I'm married 19 yrs, 2 kids, apparently ideal marriage. But I've fallen in love with someone else. Help?

Answer 1

Really sit down and think about what path you are about to take everyone on. This is a big thing you are about to do here. No one can tell you how to feel or what to do but whatever road you decide to take please do it the right way. Have you done everything possible in your marriage to try and keep it solid, I mean EVERYTHING. Good luck to you and your family.

Answer 2

First are you sure its love? Often after years of the same thing we reach out for something"new" "exciting", "different" because of boredom or familiarity. Before you do anything I would do some serious soul searching. Are you sure you want to throw away 19 yrs of marriage? Maybe you need to spice up your marriage or make a change in your life like a new job or hobby. Be sure that it is really love you feel and that it is going to be worth giving up all you have for it because it will not be an easy road to choose. Then if you are really sure sit down with your husband and be honest and straight forward because he deserves that respect and honesty after 19 years. Good Luck and God Bless

Answer 3

I hope I dont sound judgemental because I am really not trying to be. Why after 19 years of marriage would you even think of cheating or trying to find someone else. Now that it is already said and done you need to be honest with your husband eventhough you might be scared. I know that it will hurt too because at one point in time you loved your husband and he is the father of your kids. 19 years is a long time to invest into a relationship and I think that you should try to go to some kind of marriage counceling to see if the issues in your marriage can be resolved. If he even wants to forgive you.

Answer 4

Most of these side affairs are LUST and have nothing to do with love; it is the forbidden aspect that mkes it exciting, also somoene you don't live with...they always look good, are always in the mood for romance, have no work to do other than pleasing you, etc. Flimsy reasons for breaking up a 19 year marriage...and of course, if you do, and marry this person, the same pattern will repeat once the newness wears off and reality sets in.

Answer 5

I'm sick of people trying to force others to stay in marriages with their opinions. The only help I can give you is to follow your heart. If your in love with someone else move on and let your spouse find someone that will truely appreciate who they are. And not take them for granted and just do things solely out of responsibility to them. I do not know the ages of your kids but whether they live at home or are adults they will sense something is not quite right between you and your spouse if the feelings one or both of you have have died. Good luck.

Answer 6

Get a grip...fast. For one thing, there are so few 19 year marriages you should be celebrating what you have achieved, not concentrating on breaking it up. At my age, most of my friends are on their second marriages. If I had a nickle for every time someone told me they screwed up and they wished they could do it over and have their marriages back again, I'd be able to buy something really nice! Go to a counselor on your own right now so you can talk openly and find out if it's love or lust.

Answer 7

well this is a hard thing to answer but here it goes. first ask urself this do u really love the girl u married. and ask urself y did u marry her in the first place. i mean i'm know this guy for 2 years and dating and now b/f and g/f for 2 months it'll be 3 months on the 19th. and just recently i thought i liked this other guy. i mean he was sweet, cute around my age kinda and i knew i could grow to love this guy, u know. but then i time passed and even though i liked him i knew i still love my b/f. so what i did was. y do i like him whats different abt him to my b/f and the difference was is that i knew my b/f longer and cared for him longer. and i thought of all the happy times and when i thought to myself god i love this man so much.
i mean do u think u only love this girl becuz she makes u feel special. i mean ur wife can do that for u again just tell her how u feel. but if u really think u love this girl and its worth giving up 19 yrs of marriage then get an divorice. HOPE THIS HELPS!

Answer 8

You are probably in lust with someone else, you have 2 kids and a wife why did you get married if you want someone else you need to go get marriage counseling and work things out in your marriage something had to be right if you got married in the beginning

Answer 9

When you say you've fallen in love with someone else, do you mean you had an affair? If you love your wife, you owe it to her and your family to put these feelings behind you. You need to distance yourself from this woman. If you don;t feel you love your wife, then you need to seek counseling. You married your wife because she was the partner you chose to spend the rest of your life with, why screw it up now? Deal with the issues in your marriage, they are obviously there other wise you wouldn't be looking for love elsewhere. The best advice I can give you is to control yourself. Lust is deceiving and can be misconstrued as love. Perhaps all you need to do is spice up your marriage. Best of luck!

Answer 10

You need tp pull back RIGHT NOW!
You must come clean with wife about your feeling for other person.

You need th work on your marriage before an issue really starts with other person.

Your marriage is okey but I would suggest a weekend getaway for the two of you and talk with wife and have some romance as well!
Good luck.