my myspace and found out we were sneaking around and read my textmessages on my cell. I dont know what to do. how do i keep seeing him without my dad finding out?
2007-03-17 10:51:48 · 50 answers · asked by madam 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
Your boyfriend is too old for you. You should respect your father's wishes as long as you live under his roof.
Sorry, but that's the way it is.
2007-03-17 10:54:00 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 7⤊ 2⤋
Without sounding like a parent, try looking at the situation from your parent's point of view. I recall I hated my parents and thought they knew nothing. However, looking back they were actually much smarter and wiser than me.
Now let's think about why? Well, they have more life years of experience and as such can draw from those experiences.
At 15, how much do you think you know? Probably a lot and think you know everything. Well, can I ask where do you think you'll be in 5 years? You'll be 20 by then. So you think possibly college? Do you think in 5 years you'll still be with your 19 year old BF? Most likely not.
Statistically speaking, 99% of teenage relationships fail within 12 months. The other 1 % get pregnant and stay together out of guilt which then leads to other problems and the couple eventually break up.
Either way, you should give your parents the benefit of the doubt. You'll be with them much longer than any BF relationship. They'll be there for you when you get married, have children, etc.. as you mature and grow into your own life experiences.
So for now, abide by your parents' wishes and let them "win" this battle. There will be plenty more and you'll want those W's on your belt such as the request for a car, college assistance, apt in the city, etc...
;-)
2007-03-17 11:00:02 · answer #2 · answered by Destination Wine and Spirits 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Be so glad you have a dad like this. Just remember you are 15 alot of kids can't date before 16. This 19 yr old guy you're seeing should be mature enough not to be sneaking around with you. If he respected you at all he wouldn't expect you to do this. Remember, You have to respect yourself. I don't care if you are 15 or 25. Start now and let men know how you expect to be treated. Don't put your tail on the line just to see them. Don't forget, your dad was a 19 year old boy one day, that's why he is concerned. Give your Pop a break, I think he was kind of mild on the punishment.
2007-03-17 11:41:49 · answer #3 · answered by HarleyChic 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No offense, but it's pretty stupid to "sneak around" and then post about it on MySpace. Did you think dear old dad doesn't know how the web works? Maybe you're not interested in sneaking around at all. Maybe you're just trying to get more attention from daddy. That might explain why your boyfriend is so much older than you. You're at the very end of the x/2+6 scale.
2007-03-17 10:55:40 · answer #4 · answered by Chris A 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Why is he not dating someone his own age? You are not even old enough to drive!
I would have done more than grounded you. Your dad did the right thing.
I sooooo wouldn't sneak around your dad's back now. He doesn't trust you and you need to earn that back before you decide to date someone that could go to jail for making the moves on a young gal like yourself.
Be patient and wait it out. Once you are 18 and he is 22 then maybe but, until then stick to guys your own age.
2007-03-17 13:39:42 · answer #5 · answered by JennTarbox 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh if there was one thing I could tell you and hope that you would listen to - would be stop sneaking around. I know he seems perfect and you dont see anything wrong with it but your boyfriend is technically an adult. Put yourself into your dad's shoes - If you had a teenage daughter. I personally think your dad is perfectly right to try to stop you from seeing him - its parents like that who keep their kids from making huge mistakes, because at 15 you cant see all the mistakes that 'first loves' can blind you from seeing. Please know that there WILL be other guys and there will be more perfect ones that you can be with while keeping harmony. Im sure you dont really like being in a big drama with your dad and boyfriend anyways. At the end of the day - who is more important to you and who will be there ALWAYS? Its that person who deserves your loyalty right now.
2007-03-17 10:57:37 · answer #6 · answered by radiancia 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well, let's see. I'm old enough to be your dad, so I won't assist you with the sneaking.
Your dad is probably scared that you'll ruin your entire adult life before it even begins. You are under the age of consent in most states, so if this MAN you are dating is doing anything with you he runs the risk of statutory rape charges.
Speaking of which, what sort of case of arrested emotional development is your 18 yr old MAN that he is dating someone underage? I'm not suggesting he needs someone old enough to drink, mind you, but old enough to vote would be nice.
He obviously knows this is wrong or he wouldn't allow you to sneak out behind your father's back.
No, this isn't unfair. Your dad is willing to have you hate him in order to make sure you are safe. That is hell on a parent.
If you were mature enough to be dating an 18 year old, you'd be listening to your dad and abiding by his rules instead of sneaking around.
You'll have more than enough time to screw up your life. For now, he's the parent and his rules control. Wake up.
2007-03-17 10:59:56 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You should sit down and have a serious talk with your father about wanting to see this boy. Ask your father to please talk to you about why he doesn't want you to see this boy. Offer your father assurances that you understand his concerns and be very frank with him about what you would do to prevent what he is worried about from happening. You should also tell him how invading your privacy makes you feel. If he loves you and you explain to him how much his invasion of your privacy makes you feel he will probably understand. In return however you will need to be open and honest with him. Don't sneak around and hide things from your father and he will be much more comfortable with letting you make your own decisions because it will demonstrate that you are more mature. Try reminding him that you know he loves you but you will legally be an adult in just 3 years. You do want and need his guidance but you cannot grow and mature if you are being controlled instead of guided.
IMHO I think that a 19 year old guy dating a 15 year old is a bit creepy. I would seriously be suspect about his motives. It is not necessarily that he is a bad guy but all boys that age are driven by powerful biological drives. There is a 99.9999% chance that this boy will not be the love of your life. It may not be worth it to damage your relationship with your father over. I know it is hard to understand now but I guarantee you that your father is worried sick about you and his reaction is because he cares about you so much.
2007-03-17 11:01:51 · answer #8 · answered by Sirex 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If u really like this guy stay with him but go about it the right way. Have this guy meet your dad and talk things over all 3 of you i know this sounds dumb but i know this can work when i was 16 i did the same thing and my bf was 22 my dad did not like this at all but he did not know him is why. So i had my bf sit down and talk to my dad he really got to know him a little more and liked him from then on i was able to see him. Its been almost 6 years now and i am still with him my dad thinks of him as a son. Give this a try noting bad can come of this.
2007-03-17 12:00:10 · answer #9 · answered by kim 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Wow, you should be lucky to have a father that cares so much about you and wants to protect you!
This guy's too old for you, one. And two, you should listen to your dad. He's lived much longer than you. Been there, done that. He's been in this guy's shoes already and knows exactly what he's after.
As for him reading your myspace, hey, it's in public view already. So if anyone can see it, why can't he? If you're asking this type of question, that just shows how young you still are. You shouldn't act responsible if you can't take responsibility for your actions.
2007-03-17 11:40:03 · answer #10 · answered by leafmistress 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Um. It's a four/three year age difference? Be happy she isn't sneeking around with a fifty year old. Hes eighteen years old, and shes fifteen. How is this disturbing? Hes as much a "kid" as she is. I could understand consern if she was dating a 30 year old? But eighteen? Oh please. You parents need to take your heads out of your asses and just leave her alone. Depending on the state shes in, she can have sex with him legally when she turns 16. Not eighteen... AOC is usually around 16. And no, NOT WITH OTHER 16 year olds. She can legally screw someone up to 4 years older than herself.
At to the person above. If the AOC is sixteen, and he gets her pregnant when shes sixteen, this "adult" cannot be charged with anything.
2007-03-18 05:13:46 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋