wife wants 2 control me, and my 7 year old daughter from my ex wife?

Question

My wife wants to controls of me, from my daughter I have from a prior marriage I had in another state. Wants to come with me, she wanted me not to tell my daughter and ex -wife she coming. My daughter is 7 y/o and I had to be at her last basketball game of the season. She wanted me not to go without her, but she changed her mind about going because I asked why I had to withhold info about her coming with me. She gets mad, I told her I wanted her to go, but she refused and then tells me I should go and be at my daughter's game. I went I asked her it’s okay 17 times. She its okay I get back. She said I disrespected by going to the game. She feels like she being played. She afraid of my ex-wife and me are planning against her, and planning of getting back together. I stay in the state for 14 hours. Got there @ 9am and left @9:30 pm with my daughter, what the last visit I had with her is 6 months ago. I spend more with her three kids I do mine own. I ready call it quits on her.


This what my wife wrote to me,
But, I have come to the conclusion that I am a single woman. I handle all I go through by myself as you handle your situation by yourself. I just need time to reinvent my life. These little interruptions with your visitation are just a form of false hope. It disrupts my family and confuses the children. I feel that we each should concentrate on ourselves. I can't make you love me and I refuse to put anymore energy into this relationship. As I have said over and over again, you have to build your trust. You seem to think that you shouldn't. Well, I needed you to and since we are on different pages and states. I have a lot on my plate at this time and I need to deal with that.
“She asked me to help her sister move to where she is at.” since I shouldn’t help her sister moved. What yaw thought on this?

Answer 1

u r ryt...ur wife is trying to control u...it is a shame for u to spend more time w/ kids that r not yours than u do ur own...children must come first.its not ur daughter's fault that she has divorced parents..spending time w/ her is the least u cud do..ur wife is being very selfish telling u that u give false hope and disrupts and confuses her children...u need to be a man..a man enough to tell ur wife that ur child is very important to u too and that she's being selfish and unfair...she is obviously jealous and wants to prove to ur child that she's the boss by wanting to butt into ur time w/ ur own child...u r not disrespecting ur wife by going to ur own child's game..she is the one disrespecting u since she knows BEFORE she married u that u have a child already and that u visit her too...divorce shud be the last option though, its bad enough that marriage is being taken lightly these days, however, dont also forget that wives come and go, but children stays forever..u dont wanna regret and be sorry sumday that ur kid might hate u in the future for neglecting her just becoz u have a selfish wife...

Answer 2

Listen, from what you have posted here, I think she's being selfish not to agree for you to see your biological child. If you had to choose between the two, who would you choose? I hope it would be your child. Women come a dime a dozen, but, you are only a daddy once. I think you did the right thing by going to your child's game and if your wife can not understand that, then she is the one with the problem. Sounds like she's jealous. Tell her to grow up or move out and take her kids with her. Plain and simple.

Answer 3

Always remember your family comes first especially your children. There are many woman out there would love to have a man that is a good father to their children so it will be quite easy for you find someone else. Just think what happen in her previous relationship why it didn't last. Give her the boot and make sure the door close behind her.

Answer 4

She needs counseling. Get her some help. Many women think that they can handle being with a divorced man with children from the marriage, however some learn very quickly that they cannot. I saw a marriage that lasted two weeks because the new wife could not handle the old baggage.

Answer 5

She needs to grow up! How dare she expect you to drop your daughter from your life and only care about her and her children. That is sick. You are entitled to love your child and see her as often as you can. She is your child and she needs you.

If your wife can't accept that you have a daughter that you love, then let her go. No one should ask you to choose them over your own children! Children come first. Good luck.

Answer 6

Unless you've given your wife reasons to be uneasy about your ex, or your ex is playing some nasty mind game; your wife sounds either afraid, or paranoid. I suspect she was badly hurt by her ex, and she is acting this way, from the garbage she went through prior to meeting you. Good luck, and try not to give up. My ex brother in law went through hell with his wife, but stayed and worked. They are happy now, and have been together nearly 40 years.

Answer 7

your wife needs a chill pill she acts like you have no history and all your time should be spent w/her she new that you had a ex when you got married also that you had a child
my advise to you is your children come first no matter what
if she cant understand that mabe it is time for her to have some alone time never let anyone are anything come between your child she is being very shelfish

Answer 8

Sounds to me like you could use some counselling.

You're being played man. A marriage is a partnership and you should be giving and receiving from the relationship equally.

If you feel this way, you owe it to yourself to fix what ails your marriage, by seeking counselling.

Good luck.

Answer 9

Divorce this nut job, and move to the state where your daughter lives. See her as often as you can, and don't get married again, until she is grown. Good luck.

Answer 10

your wife has some "issues"

you should be able to spend time with your daughter, no questions asked.

you wife is jealous... that is crazy.

maybe it's time for you to let go, and do what is best for YOU?

otherwise, ever try marriage counseling?

all the best