She contacted him in September last year after years of no contact. He replied and they have been emailing for months since then. I found emails between them both in January 2007after i got suspicious of his behaviour. He was acting very secretive. I told him i knew. he Admitted the whole thing and added details. he says he made a mistake by tellin that her the kids and i had left him. i still cant get over the fact that he dis-owned me to her. I also found some email that he had saved in special folders. His explaination of the whole thing is that he was trying to empathize with her cause she had a divorce and he did not want her to think his life was too perfect. Does that make sense to anyone??????
2007-03-17 09:18:31 · 23 answers · asked by colleen 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
His excuses are very lame to say the least, you know in your heart that they are. He is a player who doesn't know what or who he really wants. He wants to keep a wife and someone else just in case he becomes unhappy with the other lady. Some men and not all but a select few are this way, they can't and never will be happy with just one lady in their life. They are social paths who think the world evolves around them, and his excuses make sense to him because he believes it. If a man who is happy with his life doesn't act this way, but you have to understand if you allow him to continue to act this way he will. If not her he will find someone to play the pity party with and then your world will be upset all over again, that is if you believe him this time.
2007-03-17 09:58:42 · answer #1 · answered by dollynjanie 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
oh honey been there done that! He is a LIAR at best! Do you really love this man that much who would disrespect you that much. Remind him about alimoney. child support! and you would get everthing and he would get the bill for his unfaithfulness and dishonesty!
. Sounds like he isn't being honest with you;her or his self.
He has no business having any relationship or communication with her. That he lied about you and the kids.
Email this woman and tell her everything. Sounds like he wants his cake and eat it too.
You cant make anyone love you or stay with you.
Read Dr. Phil loving smart.
After all these years? I know this must be tearing your heart out of you. Ask him to put his cards on the table. What about all the years with you and kids.
What caused them to get a divorce? Sounds like he is trying to get her back.What other lies has he told her and you?
Let her and him know the cost of this includes hurting Innocent people including children.
Talk to her woman too woman. I would email her and tell her to cry on some other woman's husband shoulder.Then I would deal with him. It would be hard to read her emails thru two black eyes.! What nerve!!!! He has and she does too..........!!!!
I am a redneck southern woman.. I would be cleaning house about now.
God would never bless them! You can walk on someone eles marriage. Marriage is holy ground.. He is disrespecting God too.! You reap what you sow! I got a divorce, went back to school. lost weight firmed up, got some counseling and healing.
I grieved and let go and put it in God's hands and he gave me beauty for ashes. It wasnt easy at first but I thrived.
I have a great life now. Nice home wonderful man that loves me and a big fat child support check everymonth and i had a nice fat alimoney check for several years while I went back to school.
I got everything but the bills!lol He got his old ole and she used him for a crutch and dumped his butt when she got over her divorce. Is he ever sorry now! Oh well as i look over my coffee cup at a real man who takes fab care of me. I got a NICE big home and cool cars vacations and he lives in a dumpy apartment with two other losers! oh well!
2007-03-17 09:55:59 · answer #2 · answered by tennessee 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck, it's a DUCK! If it was all innocent then he would have no reason to hide and lie about your very existence, if anything he should be proud to let her know that he is still happily married. Not wanting to hurt her is a pack of crap in my opinion. He had no problem trying to spare her feelings, someone that he is no longer comitted to, but you, his wife he is willing to deny. I have a serious problem with that and No it does not make sense to me. I would contact the ex if I were you and see what else he has failed to tell me. You cannot trust a liar. He sold you for less than 10 pieces of silver! Good luck
2007-03-17 09:36:43 · answer #3 · answered by spoiltrini 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Okay..let's be rational...if your ex contacted you, would you raitionalize with him by disowning your family? I think not. Let's just say you had...well then you yourself can figure that you're just trying to get that side action! So yeah...you just did the whole "other shoe thing" and you see...there really is no way of covering up this mess he's made. Why don't you put it into perspective for him and tell him the truth; how you feel and what you think really happened. He's lying to her and to you...the only truth he knows is what he wants/ed! If he's disowned you to her, who's to say he hasn't done it before...or will do it again?! I wish you the best dear!
2007-03-17 09:29:31 · answer #4 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hes lying! He wanted her attention for more then a friend and knew she wouldnt give it to him if he were happily married or married at all probably. If he thought after a short time it could be more..chances are good youd be looking at an affair ifffffff there hasnt already been something of that nature going on. Hes been deceitful and you need to call him on it and let him know you are not buying any of his BS. No more lies or get out and truly be seperated buddy
2007-03-17 09:22:31 · answer #5 · answered by jslorri 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Makes sense to any of us who have been had by a four-flushing rat. He's a liar who wants to have his cake and eat it too. He needs to choose between the two of you, and I'll bet that when she finds out he made the whole thing up about you being out of the picture, his field of choice will be narrowed by at least one.
I'd tell her myself if I were you. Serves him right, sets her on the right track about him and puts a stop to the nonsense.
2007-03-17 09:26:23 · answer #6 · answered by sparticle 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
POO! he's a liar!!!.... okay, there I used that word! LIAR! hahahaha!
He was leaving himself open for a good time! come on, most men like to connect to women in misery...you know misery loves company and AT THE SAME TIME HE MIGHT GET LUCKY! most men do get lucky because I have noticed those women who claim abuse, claim they are in miserable relationships, or the ones that dump their men due to lousy relationships are great prey for the man wanting to get a piece! hahaha!
Don't fall for his stupid lies, he was feeling good because he was talking to a women that potentially wanted him!
Low self esteem moment! you two should sit down and talk more about why he feels the need to feel so needed. He might need more attention then you think.
He sounds like a GIRL! hahahaha
2007-03-17 09:32:46 · answer #7 · answered by SecretFriend 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He could empathize with her in many different ways. Sounds like he was trying to get some side action. Be very cautious of this liar.
2007-03-17 09:24:49 · answer #8 · answered by exslidergirl 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No it does not! It seems so me like he's covering up A LOT!!! Do not fall for his jokes or lies, he's just playing a game! What you should do is leave him, just like he wanted. You do not need someone like that in your life! You deserve much better and a man who will treat you like you are the only woman on earth. I hate when men do this, they are all dogs! Don't worry, many women go through this, but they have to be smart is the trick! Be smart and do the right thing-what you heart tells you! DO NOT FALL FOR HIS GAMES!!!!
2007-03-17 09:23:10 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
If he wants to be separated then grant him his wish. Or maybe its time for your computer to get a virus and all his files are erased. Then you can get yourself a makeover and screw his brains out (try a new move or do something he thinks you never will). You can try noticing and complementing him. Men need to be acknowledged just like a woman.
2007-03-17 09:28:22 · answer #10 · answered by Sheena 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋