My husband has a 13yr old that lives with us, and all he can say is that he doesnt want to go thru it again. And that he has the right to change his mind. But its not fair to tell me for the last 2years he wants children with me and then tell me no children. I have been thru medical procedures to get ready to have a child and now being faced with not being able to.
2007-03-17 08:58:00 · 9 answers · asked by Kerri S 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Sad situation. You certainly have a reason to feel as you do, but on the other hand, a person that doesn't want to have a child, certainly shouldn't. So, where do you go from here? I suppose it depends on why and when he changed his mind. If he just said he wanted another child, because you wanted one, then I'm afraid this may be a deal breaker. But, if he's changed his mind, recently, then it's a different matter. Even if he's changed his mind recently, this issue is major, because a woman's desire and need to have children is a basic human drive, and of course a person's reasonable expectation when they marry. Your marriage probably is doomed, if your husband simply says, "No kids, end of discussion." I urge you to get counseling. I normally don't, but you folks need to talk this out, with a neutral person. By no means get pregnant before this issue is resolved. Good luck.
2007-03-17 09:17:01 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Only you know if you really loves you. And you may be right that it is a lie. But chances are he is more afraid than lying to you for the past two years. Unless you always knew it was a lie.
Don't take things into your own hand and force him but make it very clear that this is something that you want and it may bring you closer together. Most guys think about the $$$$ side of having the baby and the lifestyle. Not about the love that a child will bring to the family.
Do you love him? With or without children? I wish you a lot of luck and do not discount therapy. My best friend was forced to have children and avoided sex for 1 year. Then one drunken night and a bitter pregnancy he became the father of 2 twins. He went to therapy and while he wife refused. But when they both started going (two different doctors) things worked out.
2007-03-17 09:10:39 · answer #2 · answered by dyun1dyun1 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What is your problem? It's time to face the music and move on.You are going to go nowhere with this and the sooner you realize it the better.
I can understand where he's coming from but after being with you two yrs. he should know where the two of you stand and where you're going. Changing his mind is him simply saying he doesn't want anymore children .Not with you and likely not with anyone else either. It's not fair to have strung you along and then say he's changed his mind.Don't waste your time hanging around and hoping this will change.It won't.
Get out now and find someone who will love and respect you and want children before it's too late.Sounds cruel but it's true.Don't let anyone rob you of your right to have children or you may grow old and very lonely one day.
Good Luck and God Bless.
2007-03-17 09:10:53 · answer #3 · answered by sonnyboy 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you're able to easily ruin up. in case you have a difficulty the place you like a lie detector try, then your instincts are already confirming that he's cheating. inspite of the undeniable fact that, in case you are the only interior the incorrect, and he's not then it would incedentally make you no longer have faith him perpetually. have faith isn't some thing this is loose, and he won't have faith you ever in case you insist on a try, and you will on no account have faith him if he does not get on weekly to teach he's harmless. A courting is predicated upon have faith and connecting with one yet another, no longer on regulation. in case you sense he's interior the incorrect on some thing, no remember if it rather is important or minor, you will continually sense like that. the problem isn't his infedelity, the problem is that he he's not treating you particular, such as you're his princess, his particular one and merely. He won't have the skill to ever try this in case you insist on a lie detector try. often, although, if the guy isn't treating the girl like his one and merely, then he's not feeling such as you're his one and merely, and the problem might have all started with some thing else, like him feeling inferior in some thank you to you and desiring to compensate a technique or the different to sense greater effective. it is what motives a guy to pull removed from that particular woman and swap to somebody else, somebody who makes him sense particular as nicely.
2016-12-18 16:15:54 · answer #4 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why does he not want to go through this again. he may need counseling to help him feel different. Is this the first time he told you he does not want any more kids if i may ask? Ask him if he is open to adopting at all.
2007-03-17 09:08:46 · answer #5 · answered by Lady Hewitt 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sad. maybe he'll change his mind in a couple more years.
never know the future...always throws curves doesnt it.
you married each other to have children together or no?
If yes, its kind of a breach of contract. good luck peace
2007-03-17 09:09:23 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If I wanted children bad enough, I wouldn't let any man rob me of that dream. I'd replace him.
2007-03-17 09:05:34 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like he wanted to until his little boy turned into a teenager.
2007-03-17 09:01:57 · answer #8 · answered by mt_hopper 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's time for a divorce
2007-03-17 21:03:28 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋