I dont know what to do, i have a new born baby and the mothers a drug addict,please give me answers?

Question

I am 20 years old and my X G/F was 19 when my baby was born. My baby is 4 months old now. 4 weeks after the she gave birth, she broke up with me, and within a matter of 4 days was seeing a 31 year guy with a 14 year old daughter. Come to find out this guy sells heroin and now my baby's mother is shooting dope. I don't know what to do. She is refusing to get help. A little girl needs a mother growing up , not an addict. I know a lot of kids I grew up with who got addicted to heroin, so i called them up to ask them questions and they told me it's so hard to kick the habbit. What would you do Please answer I wuld appricate it. I want my baby to have a mother

Answer 1

The baby does need a mom, but she needs a good mom that will take care of her and her needs. A drug addict will not be able to provide that and could even put the baby in danger. In this situation the baby is better of without her biological mother. I applaud you for taking the baby. Be there for her and never leave her like her mother did, a person needs to have someone they can rely on. Someday you will find another woman who will love you and your baby, and your baby will have a mother. A mother is someone who loves, cares, provides, supports and takes care of a baby, not necessarily a biological person. Be strong and try to keep the little one from her drug addicted mother, at least until she is a bit older.

Answer 2

I would suggest that you should call the cops or department of social services or child protection services. I am a foster parent and have a 2 1/2 month old baby in my care due to the birthmom's "problems" that she was willing to kick. I only wish this little guy had a daddy like you to care so much about him...he only has us! They can help you make sure the baby is safe, and get the baby away from the mother (which is needed!) They also will work with you about getting custody of the little princess, and can help you find child care while you are at work. The will work with you, just let them know that you are unsure of how to go about the situation. The plus of contacting them is that they will also try to help the mother. Because their goal is to have both mommy and daddy in the child's life, but they also know that sometimes mommy isn't able to get her life together, and that is when daddy steps in.

I don't know if she is breastfeeding your little one, but if she is that means your daughter is getting the drugs too. Something to be concerned about. Also, if she is doing drugs, how do you know your daughter is being taken care of? Where is your baby when mama is doing the dope? Is she in the room? Has she been forgotten because mama NEEDS her fix? All questions you need answers to. Time for daddy to step in and take control of the situation.

Answer 3

If I were you I would custody of your baby, it wont be hard considering what your baby's mom is doing. If you are worried about being a single dad at 20, you know that its going to take a lot and it till be tough, I know you want your baby to have a mother but if the mom isn't doing anything good with her life than their is no point, whats important is that your baby feels loved and has a good dad to look up to, your baby is only 4 months when it comes to her teen years you'll know how to handle it, or who knows maybe you'll find a new person and your baby will have a step mom! either way you need to do the right thing and take your baby away from that drugged environment, tons of bad stuff could and will come of it. Save your daughter there is no bother saving your ex...junkies are very stubborn and even if she wanted to quit, it probably couldn't happen

Answer 4

If you feel that strongly about your baby, then why don't you get custody of it. and then find you a good woman to marry. If that is not an option, and you only want the baby to have a mother, and not a father. then call in the authorities and have the baby removed from the home and given to the state to take care of it and find it a home with a mother and a father. That baby doesn't have the choice to be in a home with a heroine addict. that habit is a bad one, and most people become addicted right after their first shot. its that addicting.
If you truly love that little one, then give her the best gift you could.. a home with parents that will take care of it and love it with all they got.. lots of families can't have children and babies are really hard to get. give her love. love her with a new home.

Answer 5

I am really sorry, and I don't think you are going to like my answer, but leave your ex. If she broke up with you, she probably doesn't even want to be your daughter's parent, and get her out of the picture. She is a terrible example to your baby. She won't help out at all, especially if she's getting high a lot. If anything, she could endanger your daughter. Say she left something lying around the house and your daughter got it and put it in her mouth? And say this happened repeatedly? Do you really want to put your baby at that kind of risk?
Leave your ex for good. If she tries to fight you for the baby. take her to court. You'll get custody because she is an unfit mother if she is doing drugs. Otherwise, she'll go to rehab and your little girl will have its biological mother.
If you leave her, you can still date and find your soulmate who will help you take care of your baby and act as your daughter's mother. You don't have to give birth to a child to be a parent.

Answer 6

you need to get custody of your daughter..
What is worse, having a mother who choses dope over you, or no mother at all...
She doesnt need a mother who doesnt care enough about herself of the baby and ends up getting into heavy drugs..
she needs people who love her to raise her..
If that means being a single father, then you have to step up to the plate. Im sure your family will help you and give you support thru this if it is the better thing for your child.

Answer 7

You will need to get Child protective services involved or the courts. Get full custody and with the courts involved they can order her to take rehab and weekly drug screens to help her stay clean. If she were to fail any of them and can make her go back to rehab again and take her visitation rights from her. If she loves that child this will kill her inside and make her want to clean up. She will need alot of support along the way as well. I sure hate to hear that she is involved in drugs.. people just do not see how much it hurts them and the ones that love them. I wish you the best with your baby and good luck with the Mother. Be firm with her and do not give in one any of her excuses.. she is going to need professional help with this.

Answer 8

Take your child from her. Go to court with a lawyer, or call the cops/CPS/SRS. My nephew was the son of a crack addict and it put tremendous stress on him emotionally that my brother has had to deal with. Yes, she needs a mother, but she needs a person(you) to be a protector and father. And it's better if she won't get help to remove the child from her soon or the emotional damage will be life long.

Answer 9

all that child needs is for you to go get her and save her life.
what the H*LL are you doing on the computer?!!
as long as she has you and you have love enough to want the best for her THAT'S all she needs. she doesn't need a mother. she doesn't have one now.

as far as i'm concerned, if you aren't part of that child's solution (to mom's problem) you are part of the problem. if anything happens to that child i hope you are held responsible if you don't go get her NOW.

SORRY
i was totally under the impression she had the child with her and you knew she was with her WHILE doing heroine.

i didn't know YOU have her 24-7. different story.

YOU GO DAD. not all women were meant to be mommies. just because they can spit them out doesn't mean they are good parents.

Answer 10

You need to get custody of the baby, and fast before the baby gets hurt. The baby needs a mom, but that's not the kind of mom she needs. Turn your ex and her new b/f in to child protective services. Good luck!