Things are out in the open now & over & done with about a relationship what I should not have been having with someone 9 & a half years out of my age group.. I'm only 18, but still have feelings for this person. My parents however do not agree with the relationship & its legally immoral. I am not allowed to contact this person anymore, but after everything is over & done with I still feel like I would like to talk to them. They were a good friend in my life, something of which is lacking from people of my own age group & I find older & more mature people easier to be around & communicate with. I dont know what I should do at all?! Should I try & leave this person alone(I dont know whats even happen to them) & move on with my life & let them live they're or after a while should I attempt to talk to them again & be friends after everything is over(legal issues). There will be nothing filed against him or I of which we 'wont' legally be allowed to see or talk to eachother. So I dont know?
2007-03-17 03:29:08 · 10 answers · asked by Lor 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
leave this person alone.i think that will be better for u.i know that this is not easy but time can make us forget all things
2007-03-17 03:44:28 · answer #1 · answered by schams2006 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
1. Legally immoral is not a term in common use. Something cannot be legislated as moral or immoral. It is precisely because we do not all agree on morality that we have to have laws. If you were under 18 when you got involved with this person, that was illegal. If this person forced himself on you or took advantage of your innocence, that's (in my opinion) immoral. Your parents are of the opinion that this relationship is harmful to you, and they are doing their job by protecting you from a man who may be fabulous but is probably taking advantage of you.
2. I know that having an older person as a friend and confidant is essential. Especially if you feel like people your own age don't 'get' you. There is nothing wrong, legally or morally with having a friend who is older than you. However, it gets murky when that friend gets so intimate that you start having sex or being physically close.
3. My recommendation: Leave this guy alone. He has his own stuff to deal with, having just been legally reprimanded for being with you. Try again. Just to find a friend, or be around older people - here are some ideas:
*Volunteer at a child care center or school. Get to know the teachers.
*Get a job in a dentist office. Meet your co-workers.
* Join a study group or book club that has mostly people older than you.
* Just be active in the world, beyond your usual hangouts (where only people your age are) and you will make friends.
* Don't look for a romantic or sexual relationship. You're only 18 - learn from watching other relationships, from talking to older people, from LIFE! Take it slow.
Here's a warning: If a man makes you feel special, but he also makes you feel ooky, leave him alone!
2007-03-17 03:46:56 · answer #2 · answered by RF 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If the relationship was enough of a problem to cause "legal issues", then I would be willing to guess that the relationship should not be initiated again.
When a relationship is over, we feel a form of grief. Give it a little time and it will diminish. In the mean time, make new friends, form new bonds, and think twice about what you are getting yourself into. Do not contact this person.
2007-03-17 03:34:28 · answer #3 · answered by Wango138 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are 18 then there is nothing in the law that stops you from seeing him. I don't get it. Were you under 18 when you were with him? If you didn't have sex then that's not illegal either. If you want to talk to him then go ahead. However, you say that you don't know what happened to him so you must not have talked in a while. Maybe you two aren't as close as you though if you havn't been communicating. If you want to be with him then call him. There's nothing wrong with that.
2007-03-17 03:36:50 · answer #4 · answered by Vince R 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you are 18 and a legal adult anywhere you live, you can do anything you wish, your parents or friends cant make you do anything now..and age is not an issue about people,, age is only a number..i know what you are going through,i have been there and done that also, and i know she still cares about me too, but she listened to everyone else, and a friend told me she has been so midserable and wants to contact me again.. so i am waiting for her anytime.
2007-03-17 03:47:18 · answer #5 · answered by wongfiehung2003 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well if you don't want any problems and so that he won't get charged with anything, I think its best to move on with your life, and if you ever get your own place, maybe then. but for now since I gather you live under your parents roof, you should listen to them. but as time goes by your feelings will fade and you just might meet someone that will fill that void in your life. good luck.
2007-03-17 03:36:20 · answer #6 · answered by misty blue 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are 18, then move out and do whatever makes you happy.
2007-03-17 03:32:37 · answer #7 · answered by mikey 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What can possibly be illegal about you seeing someone if
you are 18 yrs. of age ??...
Nothing wrong with you seeing someone 10 yrs. older than you.
2007-03-17 03:34:09 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
take my advice girl and stay away from him or them. you'll thank me later. try to hang out with people your age trust me. forget about him and move on in your life. you'll forget him very soon so don't worry. good luck.
2007-03-17 03:41:09 · answer #9 · answered by lunacat 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do whatever you feel would make you happy
just don't go and get your heart broken.
2007-03-17 03:37:36 · answer #10 · answered by nightdreamer 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋