how can you put your life back together when your best mate steals your husband?

Question

i was with my husband for ten years and he has just left me for what was my best mate . i was told the day of her fathers funeral

to find out more about this check out this site

http.// cliftonlloydthanx.blogstop.com

i must say to people who think i mistreated him i never did i gave him everything i ahd and more . as for her she can crawl from the rock she came from and take him and that bastard child
with them of the nearest cliff

Answer 1

just move on and thank God you found out and that they are out of your life

Answer 2

That should be http://cliftonlloydthanx.blogspot.com/ The other URL leads to a squatter.

I think it would help a lot if you don't think of this as your friend 'stealing your husband'. People aren't property, and tangoing requires couples.

Once the dust has settled and these two people have stopped shagging like crazed weasels, and face up to trying to build a life together, it's highly likely that at least one of them is going to realise what they've lost. Maybe they'll regret it. Maybe they'll want to go back to the life they left.

For a man who's been married for a decade, the opportunity for a fling can be very attractive - a chance to feel again the thrill of a new 'conquest'. It works for women too: a new affair is *exciting*. It may even be irresistible. In this case, it was.

But there's a big difference between the heady delights of a new passion and the deeper love and interdependence that makes a good ten-year marriage. Passion dies down eventually, but the bond of a good marriage can last forever.

When your understandable anger (frustration, hurt, humiliation) dies down, you might want to consider - calmly and rationally - whether you'd really prefer to go back to how it was before this happened. There are two possible answers, and both have ramifications:

If you *would* like him back, you have to be prepared to stay rational and wait for a signal from him. It may be a while in coming, but when and if it does, you have to try not to let your anger screw it up, because he may be too scared and humiliated himself to do it twice.

If you *don't* want him back, then you have to ask yourself whether the relationship was ever very profound in the first place. If this infraction is enough to destroy any affection you may have for him, is it fair to blame him for feeling unhappy in the relationship? Well, maybe you think it is, in which case you can let it go without regrets. You'll still have to interact because of your kids, and I hope you won't tie yourself in knots trying to hurt him over this. Because whatever happens, deriving pleasure from another's pain is a pretty lousy hobby.

CD

Answer 3

First of all you need to start to let go of the pain and to heal from this. I suggest counseling for you and for how you are feeling. Take up a new hobby and get a complete makeover and a new hairstyle. Go get some new clothes too... This will make you feel better about yourself. Make some new friends as well..... Do things for you and try to keep positive and upbeat through all of this. Good luck to you and I hope things get better for you soon... Here comes lots of hugs your way. I can feel your pain.
First of all this person was not really a friend at all to have done this to you and your husband did not really love you the way he should have in the first place or this never would have happened. You deserve better then this for you and for your life. I was nothing you have done.

Answer 4

Its difficult to deal with the end of an intimate relationship but to also lose your best friend on top of it is overwhelming. Try to look at this as an opportunity to change your life for the better (as hard as it may be). Make new friends, date, surround yourself with people who you know love you (family, your children, your church.......) I am sure you have friends other than you "best mate" ,lean on them for support and encouragement. Just because your husband is no longer in the picture and your "best mate" will no longer be your best mate, get a new best mate. When 1 (or 2) doors close it opens up other doors. This is not the end of the world, it's the beginning of a new journey for you. Embrace it and go forward. Don't allow others down falls to bring you down. Good luck!

Answer 5

I wouldnt say she was a friend in the first place and thay both deserve each other , life will get better just wait and see just look at it another way once a rat always a rat he will cheat on her soon enought and she will know how it feels and as for him , he will most likely come running back with his tail between his legs ,give him a good old kick in the nuts and tell him go do a run and a jump,

Answer 6

First, like maximum of others you're examining the ten Commandments with a twenty first. Century mentality as though they have been written in English and for people who think of how we do. it is to no longer say that the ten Commandments at the instant are not suited on the instant, basically that we fail to nicely known the way they have been meant. at first, the ten Commandments initially have been favourite as "The Decalogue," or the ten words. those 'Ten words' have been inscribed in God's Holy Language (extremely than present day English) and have been divided into the 'do' and the 'do no longer' lists. initially the ten Commandments have been ten single words written in an easier language that conveyed a which ability almost impossible to translate right into a single English be conscious. as an occasion, 'thou shall no longer kill...' A extra spectacular translation for this Commandment into English could be: "No-homicide," if a single be conscious existed in English that would desire to particular this which ability. None-the-much less, in our very own day and age 'homicide' remains unacceptable on a similar time as 'killing' is especially cases unavoidable and is often very needed. Adultery, thievery, mendacity and covetous conduction all defy appropriate ethical norms and fall into the 'do no longer' classification. what's so surprising approximately this? the 1st 5 Commandments are addressed to a people who known a Covenant with God and basically factor out the 'policies of habit.' lower back, what's so surprising approximately this? As an atheist you will possibly be able to desire to evaluate your self an urbane and state-of-the-paintings person plenty too clever to have faith in God. the ten Commandments have been meant for a simplier people so why are you even bothering us basic-people on the non secular and Spirituality talk board of Yahoo Questions and solutions??? Are you likely no longer basically an atheist yet in addition a... Troll? Inquiring minds want to nicely known! H

Answer 7

Hi there

Been in a similar deal. Trust me these type of people are everywhere. Some are your friends some can even be your family members. Best to compose yourself and start building a new life for yourself. Its awful to say but sometimes you have to learn the hard way about certain people and the tricks they do. No one shows their real side until they have to.

You are better off without the pair of them and will meet someone who will treat you better

Best wishes

Idai

Answer 8

say good ridance
or
would you rather find out 10 years later they were sleeping together,,,,
everything happens for a reason.........
perhaps God opened the doors because you can and you do deserve better in Life.
It might hurt but, the pain will pass and one day you'll be thankful for the future you're living
and you'll think how silly you were to want to settle for a loser of a mate

Answer 9

You take it a day at a time and cut all ties with them both.Contact a solicitor and start divorce proceedings on the grounds of adultery.Don`t have any contact with them but only through your solicitor.Eventually you`ll move on and the hurt and anger will go away and just remember once a cheat always a cheat............good luck.

Answer 10

I feel your pain. There is no greater pain than the betrayal of your husband and a friend in the married world.
Take it one day at a time Hun. Surround yourself with fun people and fun things. And love yourself more. Know you didn't cause this. They did!
God bless and good luck!

Answer 11

I am so sorry. I too Lost my husband, but that was to my babysitter who was 13. It is hard to get over. I wish I had a more direct answer for you but you need to go through the grieving cycle. I wish you the best of luck and remember that you have support here.