In a nutshell:
Met guy on dating site.
Been seeing him for 4 months.
Things going well.
Saw he was still logging into dating site regularly.
Against better instincts posted a fake profile (I know, I know).
He contacted fake profile.
Fake profile is meeting him for a date this week.
My problem with this is: armed with this information I really don't know what to do. I don't want to be seen as a bunny boiler, but things obviously aren't going as well for me as for him. Do I dump him straight off? Now I know where I stand do I go along with it just for fun and date other people as well? Or do I turn up for his date with fake profile just to see his face?
2007-03-16 22:45:17 · 16 answers · asked by Picky Bird 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
PS: Had been getting intuition he wasn't being quite honest with me for a while, so my friend advised me to do this to find outsooner rather than later.
Mast_Kumar, why post? You obviously are in desperate need of the points....
2007-03-16 22:56:36 · update #1
Walk away. If you confront him he'll probably walk anyway because you caught him out. If after 4 months he's still dating other people then he's not for you - unless you want to be with someone who dates other people behind your back.
Don't tell him the date is you. Don't cancel the other date - let him show up and be stood up. He deserves it for messing you around.
Ok you'll be a bit disappointed but 4 months isn't a lifetime and you'll get over it easier now. If he's making a date with your fake profile you can rest assured he'll have been dating other women too.
One of your reactions might be that it's still early days and you can win him over. Don't kid yourself though honey. If you're needing to change someone in terms of attitude to commitment so early on in the relationship then there's very little chance of a happy future. Do yourself a favour and go find yourself another date!
2007-03-16 22:53:32 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Now it depends on what it is you're looking for. If you were looking for something serious then you should know that online dating is very tricky. You cant trust that person unless there is good reason to believe you are definitely an item. 4mths is no time to see that and he is obviously not ready to committ if he is still logging in. But what i'd do is go along to the meet and introduce yourself as you're fake, so he knows you know. Then just say...no biggy. But when you leave let him believe its all good and you'd still see him (if you wanna) and do you're own thing. If thats too long... then just dont tell him anything... just leave him hanging and get on with your life. He'll soon get the idea that he's been dumped without you saying a word and that will hurt him more, (or not depending what kind of animal he is!!). Good luck.
2007-03-16 23:43:19 · answer #2 · answered by chiccigyal 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This is not good. I think the best thing you could do is meet him as agreed (as the fake person) then he will get one hell of a shock when you turn up. Tell him that you knew he wasn't being honest with you and decided to find out for sure. You now know he is a loser and can confidently tell him that you and him are finished and not to bother contacting you again. At the end of the day you will be the winner in all this because you will meet someone nice and be happy. He probably won't. Pride yourself on the fact that you are a faithful truthful person and have self esteem not to put up with this jerk. He really isn't worth it but you are.
2007-03-17 00:30:01 · answer #3 · answered by Pete R 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Thats a hard one, but you seem quite rational about it all. I would confront him but not in an offensive way. You will have to come clean with the way that you found out that you may not be the only person he intends to date, but you should also be the bigger person and just try and deal with it calmly. He is a rat for contacting your fake profile, and as satisfying it would be for you to see him squirm if you meet him on your 'date', I wouldnt even go to the effort to meet him.
I know this doesnt really make up for what has happened,, but you should be glad you found out now after four months and not 12 months when you have formed stronger feelings for this person. You sound like a nice person so move on and find someone who wants you and you alone. You deserve better. Good luck with everything.
2007-03-16 22:54:48 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
To be honest, if he is seeing other people, then he is not really commited to you. If it's like this early doors, then it is going to be like this later on. He is also casuing you to change your normal behaviour patterns, again not good. My suggestion here would be get out, run for the hills, blow him out! Have some respect for yourself and dont let this guy mess you around. Find someone who will commit to you and treat you with the respect, care and thought you deserve, not play you for a fool. I did think about joining a dating site, but after reading some of the posts on here.... May be not!
Anyway good luck, and do yourself a favour ditch the losser before you get really hurt.
Hope things work out for you!
2007-03-17 01:04:48 · answer #5 · answered by djp6314 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I would go on the date just to see his face then dump him!! That is not the thing to be doing!
2007-03-16 22:48:55 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
u naughty girl doing thay sly thing...anyway done now no point dwelling on it... it would depend on how much u liked him and can u see urself with him for the forseable future??? i would talk about it with him if u like him that much..but if u really can't see urself staying with him then brake it off... no point staying with him for the sake of it...then on the other hand u could meet him with the other profile u made and then see what he has to say 4 himself...good luc...xxx
2007-03-16 22:52:52 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
well...unfortunatelly this type of men never stops....
From other side 4 months are not that long period. Maybe he needs more time to change his mind ..I think you should go on the date and see what will happen...dont keep this inside you...good luck!
2007-03-16 22:57:23 · answer #8 · answered by cherry 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would turn up at the fake date and say,"Surpise!", then I'd dump him.
2007-03-16 22:56:20 · answer #9 · answered by Rocky 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You should show up (what a coincidence) as yourself and watch him squirm as he waits for fake profile.
2007-03-16 22:51:55 · answer #10 · answered by kuntess 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋