I'm afraid to send or say the letter I wrote. I have two choices of letters; which should I use?

Question

The first letter is what I wrote at first. but I'm not sure about it. I want her back but I don't want to make her think I'm weak or obsessive or anything because it's long. I also want to be honest. The second letter came from someone who shortened it for me, and I like it and I think it would work but the problem is that I didn't write it. Which should I use? Here's the first one:

Hey. How are you? You know, ever since we stopped talking, (we haven't talked for 10 months) I had been going over everything in my head, trying to figure out what I was doing wrong. I still remember what you said to me the last time we talked, the things you were mad at me about. It was because of you that I started working on those things. I know you probably still don't want to talk to me. It's just that a special girl like you is hard to find, you're unlike any friend I've ever had. No other girl is as amazing, wonderful, smart, talented, funny, and beautiful as you. No one else has your light brown eyes that sparkle when you're happy and fade away when you're sad, or your bright smile. There was a time when I was feeling down that you could tell something was wrong because you know me. I'm the same way about you. I know you think I don't know you, and I know I don't know everything about you, but I want to know everything about you. I really care about you and like I said, you're

special to me. I'm tired of playing silly games around you, trying to act like you're not when you really are. Without you, I just had to admit that I must be really stupid for not understanding then what you were trying to tell me, that it wasn't anything wrong with me that you didn't like, it was you just didn't share those feelings for me that I had for you.
I've found out for myself it was better when you didn't like me in that way. Now that you don't like me at all, it's alot worse. For the things I've done, I'm really sorry. I was just afraid of losing you, so I did. I only want us to start over, pretend this whole thing never happened and if necessary forget that there was any mention of romantic interest between us. I know with you I don't have a chance. I just want your friendship back, if it's ok with you. (END) (continues If sent in a letter) If writing this to you makes how you feel about me worse, then if you'd like to, just forget that I wrote it.

If what you want is to never see me or speak to me again, I will just try to let you go just because I only want to make you happy. (END of 1st letter)
Here's the second one, the one I didn't write, but it's shorter

Hey. How are you? You know, ever since we stopped talking, I realized how much I missed you. I still remember what you said to me the last time we talked, the things you were mad at me about. I've really grown and worked on things to improve my life. I'll understand if you still think you made the best decision by breaking up with me, but I know that a special girl like you is hard to find. I'm grateful that you know me better than anyone else. I know that we had our ups and downs, and I would really like to work on things and get to know you again. I think there is a lot that we can learn about one another. I will respect whatever decision you make. Take care. (END of 2nd letter)

So, what do I do? Maybe I should combine the two? I'm 17, she turns 17 in two weeks

Answer 1

ok..wheres the second one.....need to compere them.....I feel upon reading your original tho there is lot left out...me being an ex journo can also read between the lines......I will just let you know this, at this time........you cannot force someone to respond to your advances, nor can you force them to love you as much as you love them.....their feelings are their own and can only be changed by them and not someone else....It may be, that as time has passed she has realized one of two things..she either loves you or she does not...but in saying that...with the time spent together and trying to get to know each other, you may just have cemented a good friendship....
Also remember, a truly loving relationship is based on a truly strong friendship..........don't give up, send your original as only she really knows what you are trying to say on a personal level...(experiences shared)...we do not have that option or hindsight..........best of luck, hope it works out the way you want it.....don't force the issue, take a softer approach, be patient and she may just respond..............

Ok.. I just read the second one and I still stand by what I say above...she will know...you didn't write that one, therefore she will also believe none of the content is really coming from your heart....(we girls are very perceptive).....send the original....good luck again.

Answer 2

Personally I would only send the other version if thats what you truly mean. Otherwise she may start to pick holes in it and test your sincerety.

It is a shame that you fell apart but reading between the lines you two are worlds apart. I can't see that after 10 months she will want to carry on where you left off. I think by now she has found someone else to spend time with so I wouldn't get your hopes up just in case, by all means tell her how you feel but dont think for one minute it will be an easy task bringing her round.

my guess is that you wanted to move the relationship that little bit further and she wasn't ready, I may be wrong but thats what ive come up with reading between the lines...

I dont know what else to suggest..

Answer 3

Sorry to say this, but you are sounding needy. I dated someone years ago like that and it got old REAL FAST. Just tell her thanks for pointing out things you needed to work on if you must, but take advantage of that advice, learn from it and move on to find someone who only knows the new you and not someone who you have to overcome your old self. And don't let it just be a "New Years Resolution" thing that you tire of, when you catch yourself sliding back into your old ways stop right there and correct yourself. Eventually you will be different and you won't have to work on it and THAT will help you find a new a better relationship.

Answer 4

DEFINTLY COMBINE THE WHOLE EYE THING IN THE SECOND LETTER! I WOULD SOO LOVE THAT IF A GUY SAID THAT TO ME!