pints of Guinness please."
So the bartender brings him three pints and the man proceeds to alternately sip one, then the other, then the third until they're gone. He then orders three more.
The bartender says, "Sir, I know you like them cold. You don't have to order three at a time. I can keep an eye on it and when you get low I'll bring you a fresh cold one."
The man says, "You don't understand. I have two brothers, one in Australia and one in the States. We made a vow to each other that every Saturday night we'd still drink together. So right now, my brothers have three Guinness Stouts too, and we're drinking together.
The bartender thought that was a wonderful tradition.
Every week the man came in and ordered three beers. Then one week he came in and ordered only two. He drank them and then ordered two more.
The bartender said to him, "I know what your tradition is, and I'd just like to say that I'm sorry that one of your brothers died."
The man said, "Oh, me brothers are fine - I just quit drinking."
The local District Judge had given the defendant a lecture on the evils of drink. But in view of the fact that this was the first time the man had been drunk and incapable, the case was dismissed on payment of ten shillings costs. "Now don't let me ever see your face again," said the Justice sternly as the defendant turned to go. "I'm afraid I can't promise that, sir," said the released man. "And why not?" Because I'm the barman at your regular pub!
Wishing everybody a Happy St Patrick's Day skycat!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2007-03-16 22:28:35 · 22 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
two for the price of one what a bargain lol
2007-03-17 01:24:42 · answer #1 · answered by barn owl 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
....nevertheless humorous!! 2 couples had long gone away for the weekend. the two men, Jack and invoice, have desperate to attempt to cajole their different halves to do somewhat better half swapping for the nighttime. After various beverages that nighttime they succeed. Jack knows of it is that factor of the month for his spouse and the assumption-approximately invoice no longer understanding this makes him smile. the lads agreed that as quickly as they take a seat around the breakfast table here morning, they'll faucet their teaspoons on the area of their espresso mug the style of situations that they did it with one yet another's different halves. the subsequent morning they are all on the breakfast table, somewhat hung over and fairly uncomfortable, whilst Jack proudly faucets his teaspoon three times against his espresso mug. After a quick 2d of questioning, invoice takes his teaspoon and faucets it as quickly as on the strawberry jam and three times on the peanut butter!
2016-10-02 06:42:48 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ha Ha! Good ones. Especially the second joke! Funny!
2007-03-17 00:49:22 · answer #3 · answered by cats 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The first joke is good, but can't be true, an Irish person would never stop drinking!
The second one... is it even a joke?
2007-03-16 22:31:49 · answer #4 · answered by Ni 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The brothers joke is one of the best I've ever heard.
2007-03-16 23:43:57 · answer #5 · answered by Santee 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The first one was the best!
2007-03-16 22:31:22 · answer #6 · answered by Kate 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
lmao... those are hilarious..
hahaha hahaha
thanx for the laugh
Happy St Patrick's Day to you too
2007-03-16 23:53:53 · answer #7 · answered by PerFecT StrAngEr.. is back 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
the first one is a bit old but still funny,
second one lol
2007-03-16 22:39:59 · answer #8 · answered by ellierckworld 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I liked it, happy ST Pat's to you too
2007-03-16 22:36:09 · answer #9 · answered by Sunset 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He He He!! Happy Paddys Day!!
2007-03-16 22:34:18 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋