I decided I don't want my late father's money from his estate, I will just sign the check and give it to my daugther. I have always been independant from my family also, there has been spoiled brats in the family. This is what I am most comfortable with at this time.
I have some tough issues to deal with rights now, Dad dragged us to through a life of alcohol and a rough one. I have to find in heart to forgive and move on. I need to be a peace with myself right now. Please send me your prayers. I will be seeing a Counsellor. Any advice??
2007-03-16 22:26:29 · 5 answers · asked by Emily L 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Yes.
You can be right, or you can be happy.
Forgiving your father is not a matter of duty. You don't ever have to do that as long as you're willing to live with the consequences of the emotional burden you keep carrying.
Here's a story:
Two Bhuddist monks, sworn to celibacy, poverty and non-contact with women, travelled through the countryside. They came upon a river they needed to wade through. At the side of the river was a woman who had a hard time crossing the river.
One of the monks picked her up and carried her across.
Hours later, his fellow asked him: "Brother, why did you pick up that woman at the river? You know we're not supposed to have contact with women?"
His fellow replied: "Brother, I set that woman down miles ago. Why are you still carrying her?"
Make a simple decision right now:
Let the past be GONE or carry it further.
Your father is DEAD, and all his evil deeds are in the past. The only evil deeds yet to be done are the ones you will do to yourself by throwing a good future after a bad past.
2007-03-16 22:35:59 · answer #1 · answered by flywho 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your father made mistakes, but he's gone now. Leave the past in the past and try to forgive him. If you don't need the money setup a trust for your daughter. You need to try to look at all of the positives in your life. You said you had a daughter and maybe a husband? Focus on your loved ones and realize that no matter how bad things were they're in the past and you can either leave them there and go on or you can stay there with them and miss all of the good around you. I'll pray for you and your family. God Bless You!
2007-03-16 22:54:31 · answer #2 · answered by candy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take the money from your dad's estate and set up a trust fund for your daughter.
As for forgiving your dad, you have the right desires and something that may help you fulfill that desire is trying to understand what led your father down that path.
Was your grandfather an alcoholic? A lot of behaviors our parents have are behaviors they learned from their parents.
Forgiveness will give you peace and understanding will help you forgive!
Good Luck!
2007-03-16 22:44:21 · answer #3 · answered by Rustb 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i'd say keep the money in a savings account and have your daughter as the beneficiary... not sure how old your daughter is... but if she's going to university, then have the money go to her tuition... if she's out of university, maybe use the money for her rent or her new car...you get the idea, right? one thing though in life, if you can forgive your parent(s), then you can forgive anyone, including yourself... seeing a counselor is a great idea as well... sounds like you have gone through tough times and survived them.., my prayers be with u
2007-03-16 22:49:35 · answer #4 · answered by ogg08 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why see a counselor when you can just use yahoo? LOL.......no but for real I empathize with you. My father dragged me through a life of emotional beatings. I will not get into detail of it. I know how it is to hold grudges. just know that it is better to release it and learn from it or think nothing of it. I am sorry for your loss I don't know how it is to loose a dad...... I always considered him already gone.
2007-03-16 22:36:14 · answer #5 · answered by Green 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋