Is this kind of weird for a 17 yr. old guy to think like this?

Question

I guess I'm just mature for my age (17), but along with wanting to do what most guys my age want to do (rush and join fraternities, party, etc) I wish I could just skip all of that and just get married. Ofcourse, I do intend on partying and living the college experience (unless I DO get married) but I'd rather find my sweetheart and cuddle w/ her until the stars burn out. I most likely am not going to get married 'till later because I am young, but is this strange of me to want??? Most of my friends just want to join a fraternity, drink beligerantly, and have random sex...


Just to make clear...It's not like im really ugly with no friends and have no life lol. I've had my fair share of opportunities with girls. I use to model and have been heavy on the party scene. I just think my wife-to-be would appreciate it if I didn't have sex with a lot of girls before her because I know I would want my future wife to limit her pre-marital experience.

Mallory - that'd be really cool. i think your account got suspened tho so i don't know your email address. if you ever see this you can email me. [e-mail]

Answer 1

you sound like a really sweet guy =] i'm 17, and i used to model too =].. umm that's cool, as long as u don't make any decisions you would regret later.. like if u did get married really young, just think before you do anything... but remember to have fun at the same time.. maybe you'll find a girl you'll fall in love with this way.. we only get to live the college life once.. so live it up =]. and yes, i like it when guys haven't had a lot of sex... also, i know it sounds kinda dorky, but the thought of STDs kinda freaks me out, so it's better if a guy doesn't have that much sex.

if you wanna e-mail me, that'd be cool.. i have pics and stuff..
xox mal

Answer 2

Do you remember what you thought about life just 5 years ago? I bet you saw things very differently then. Nowadays, I am sure you see things in a more complex way. I bet you would probably do a few things differently. If you could change your way of thinking in such a short span of time between now and 5 years ago, don't you think your way of seeing the world will get even more complex in another 5 years? Do you know how hard it is to even stay in the same relationship for more than 5 years? There are no shortcuts in life. We all need to experience dating, holding down a job, paying bills before we can be ready for marriage. Think about it, what would the 22 -year-old version of you say if you had gotten married and settled down at the age of 17? Most people I know who settled down that quickly are not the happiest campers. I hope you focus on a plan for your life if you are that serious. I mean, go to college, get good grades, get an advanced degree and earn a lot of money. Then, I bet you would make better choices for a life partner. You do know that the divorce rate in this country is higher than 50%, right? Do you want to be married for 5 or 10 years before you or your spouse decide "things have changed" or "we are not the same people" and then get divorced? I was once your age too and I also dreamed of settling down. Now I realize a lot of it was the flood of hormones my teenaged body was experiencing, not to mention the reality that I would be a legal adult in a few short months... Whatever you decide to do, good luck. PS: Those guys that want to join a frat, etc. seem very immature. There are so many organizations that do good for our society. Do we need more elitists running around in this country?

Answer 3

You're not weird at all. You just seem more mature than your friends do. Not to put them down or anything. These days it is so rare to find a guy who thinks the way you do, it's kind of sweet and charming. I'm seventeen too, and I think that your expectations of yourself and "wife-to-be" are admirable. Just keep in mind that marriage changes the relationship and adds a great deal more stress to a person's life. Not to say that marriage is bad, but that it needs hard work and commitment. I think whoever you find will be very lucky.

Answer 4

no, not at all. I'm nineteen, have only been drunk once, have never had sex because I'm waiting to marry my girlfriend of almost two years, once we finish school, I have never randomly hooked up, nor am I rushing a fraternity. You're completely normal, and yes, I think it is a maturity thing. My dad used to say i was 15 going on 35.

Answer 5

Your future wife WILL appreciate it, because guys tend to be jerks at your age, it comes across as strange but its not... I'm 20 and getting married this year, and people think I'm strange too because I'm happy to not screw around. Its special to be with the one you spend your life with, instead of 40 other people first... Your wife isn't going to WANT to wonder "do i measure up to the ones before me" every time she goes to bed with you... that doesn't mean she has to be your only one, but the fewer, the more important she will feel... if you find a girl as special as you are, meaning as interested in her future mate as you are in yours, you'll be just as special to her... there is NOTHING weird about choosing live towards your future instead of in the moment... it might just save you from STD's...

Answer 6

It is wonderful to hear people like yourself still exist! It is not weird, people are probably gonna tell you that and you can tell them to take a flyin' leap. There is something special about being able to give something to someone you care for deeply that not many other people have had. Standing firm can be hard but you'll make it as long as you don't let someone else convince you otherwise.

Answer 7

omg... i just luv you.... i thought all guys were so immature.... thats so good for you.... see thats why i like older guys (i'm 15 and i like 18 year olds, not like 40 just so you noe) they are more mature.... i mean when you go on dates don't ask the girl to marry you, that will totally scare her away, but yeah live you life, but think about your future. One day your going to have such a great wife.....
:)

Answer 8

I think that women will be over you since people I know aren't really sincere and "romantic"I'm not gay, I'm just saying that women love guys like you and to want to do "cuddle" is what a woman wants (usually unless they're the gay ones).

Answer 9

dont get married to quick, my sis got married at 16, and had a son back on indenpencence day in 2000, right after that, her 17 year old husband got sent off to prison for 7 years for doning drugs because of his son, which he thought ruinded his life.

now jeff is 6 and we have had to teach him that he dont have a dad, but one day he will ask "where is my dad, can i see him?" and none of us know how to answer that question.

im not saying your like that, but its best to wait in any situation

Answer 10

Okay, just because you added the part with "I used to model" makes me think the contrary of everything you say.
And what you "think" isn't anything special, because you clearly state you wouldn't mind living the collegge experience, you just PREFER a relationship.
So, whatever floats your boat.