My six year old is a tattle tale....?

Question

I do daycare and she is driving me nuts and tattling on all of the kids over the littlest things...things that arent bad but annoy her. I am afraid kids wont like her at school or here even for being a "tattle tale". Who do I teach her to stop, of course I want her to tell me if someone is doing something that could hurt someone and serious things like that, but if I dont see a kid snatch something from somebody, I dont want to know becuase when I try and resolve the issue..all the kids say they had it first!.

Answer 1

I said this to my daughter, " I know you have a lot to tell me. But I want to hear about YOU. I don't want to hear what the other kids did today, unless it was hurtful to you." When she starts with the glinda the Good witch did this or Wicked witch of the West did this, stop her and say, "I don't want to hear about them, they have their own moms that will handle them. I want to hear about you."

Answer 2

hmmm my six year old is just as bad...mommmmmmmmy, Dustyn (his brother) is reading his book upside down... and I care why? I started by telling him what the right things were to tattle on, hitting, biting, someone hurt or someone breaking a big rule, like going out the gate, hurting an animal, calling names ect. Finally after I had told him this for a month or more. I then told him that if he tattled on anything that was not important then I would discipline him, putting him in time out, taking away his beloved cartoons or what ever needed to be done. It is SLOWLY working. It becomes such a habit that it is hard to break. I have been consitent, always following through and I have seen some improvement, very little, but I see hope, a light at the end of the tattling tunnel. I hope.

Answer 3

The most important thing is for you to stay out of whatever it is. The reason kids do this is because Mom gets involved and even if the child doesn't get what she wants (sometimes it's for the other kid to get in trouble) she will always get attention. (Kids will work to get even "negative" attention.)

I found a solution to this when my children were little.

I had both kids involved go sit on the stairs and talk about the problem until they could both come and tell me the same story.

I stayed nearby where I could hear them but they could not see me just in case, but I did not get involved in the discussion. I even let them fuss with each other as long as no one was being hurt.

This worked like a charm. Over a few months the amount of tattling dropped to nearly nothing, and the kids learned to sort out problems with each other without my intervention.

But the important thing to know is that a lot of times kids tattle and fuss simply because it gets Mom involved. If Mom stays out of it the problem goes away.

Oh, and one more thing. When you first start dealing with it differently your child may temporarily do more of the undesirable behavior. Ignore it. If you tend to it while she's acting worse it will get worse. This has a technical name- it's called an extinction burst. Wait it out and the behavior will change. (Yes, you do have to protect the weaker child if s/he is at risk of being hurt, but be as neutral as possible while you do it. Just put your body between the kids and separate them while having as little conversation as you can.)

Answer 4

You can try teaching her conflict resolution skills appropriate for her age. Show her how she can deal with the issue by sharing what she understands with her peers. It may sound a bit much for kids but my six year old is a tattle tale and at first, I thought the same things you do. I didn't want to disregard her ability to assess right from wrong so I asked her what she did about the situation. It started with 'nothing' ...then it became 'I told you'...I told her that it would be good to share why what is going on is wrong with her peers based on what she understands, instead of me or another adult intervening. The child learns to apply what she knows in interrelationships with her peers. It also gives her an oppotunity to lead by example.

There's of course bumps along the road which can include complete rejection from her peers but in the long run, a lot of kids warm up to that. Still encourage her to share her stories with you but it must come with actions that she decides to take with her peers.

Just an idea.

Answer 5

Tattling should be treated like any other bad behavior. Let her know that you don't want her to tattle. You don't want her to tell you about anything that anyone else is doing unless they are getting hurt or are hurting someone else. If she tattles otherwise, she is going to get punished herself. Then, follow through. If she tattles, put her in time out or take away a privelege, etc. She will figure it out quickly and stop tattling.

Answer 6

Bullying is a widespread problem and additionally you may motivate her mothers and dads to act on it. it is no longer a "known" youthful people journey and we could consistently supply up treating it that way. many of the modern college massacres have been committed by infants who have been picked on and dealt with like outcasts. have not we discovered? those issues could have an prolonged-lasting effect on the victims and influence their tutorial overall performance and emotional wellbeing. colleges does not settle for the open use of racial or ethnic slurs by a new child in the direction of yet another, yet it is okay to belittle a new child approximately their weight or different features, real or concocted. And it desires to circulate previous the lecturers...they have adequate to do and can't be anticipated to babysit all day long. I say 3 strikes and additionally you're out for bullies. perhaps their mothers and dads will do some thing whilst they are expelled from college.

Answer 7

She is at an age where she has a hard time choosing what is the right time to tell so she tells all the time. Point out to her each time why she was right or wrong to tell. That way she can learn when to tell and when not to-its a learning experience for her-so she wont turn into one of those kids who tell all the time.

Answer 8

She is six years old thats what they do best..tattle!! Give her rules for tattling, only tattle if someone is getting hurt!! Only tattle if she really thinks its something that needs to be taken care of by you.

Answer 9

ok this is a hard subject well ok i guess that u would do nothing unless she is doing it like 20 times in 01 hour then slowly and i mean slowly try to tell them that it is ok if people do things different and tell her the difference between good things that people do that u dont like like cheerleading and bad like pinching you. k hope it helps

Answer 10

Man that suxs!! But the best way to tell your child to stop is by acting like her...just say: oh (your childs name) just spilled milk. Or whatever just to see how she likes it. I know she wouldn't like it if the tables got turned on her so maybe that's the answer!