alrighty....
so i am 27, right? beck when i was 14 i met this awesome guy~~we were exactly the same in nearly every way, and soon became inseperable. (no you unsentimental jerks, he isn't gay) i liked him, but only crossed the best friend line once when i kissed him at a homecoming dance. lol.... i used to force him to date my friends, but we have always been best friends. i ran off and married at 17, he married at 21, i divorced at 21 and found another relationship, blah blah blah.
SO.
my marriage is failing, i am unhappy, he cheats and i feel as if i am only here to be a live in babysitter. my friends marriage has been over some time now. we are thinking maybe we finally want to cross out of the friendship zone....
he's meeting me in our home town in a few weeks....
what should i do????
i know i love him, i always have. but is it worth the risk?
2007-03-16 11:17:46 · 23 answers · asked by ? 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
true love is always worth the risk - get out of a marriage that makes you feel that way. it sounds to me that you might have been trying to find the right man this whole time and he's been right in front of you.
2007-03-16 11:22:04 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
A good marriage begins by being friends.
To me, that's one of the most important things in a marriage. It allows you the comfort of growing old together knowing that you share the same interests and that you'll still be the same two people when you're fifty that you are now.
Clearly you knew you had more than friendship feelings when you kissed him at the homecoming dance.
You say your marriage is failing. Are you getting divorced? Children involved? You feel like a live in baby sitter? Where's the love?
You ask if meeting him in your home town is it worth the risk.
True love is often worth the risk. Life is about living not just existing.
First ask yourself if he's just on the rebound from a bad marriage or if he's just seeking someone to talk to or what.
I'm not saying cheat on your husband but perhaps seeing this old friend might provide if nothing more, a chance to talk with someone who understands where you're coming from.
I'd suggest at least seeing him and see how he has changed and if that spark is still there.
Then decide if it's worth the risk of you getting divorced too.
2007-03-16 11:35:18 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes its defiantly worth the risk. Yes you have been friends for a long time but if your sure you love him and you think your ready to make the leap from friends to lovers make sure hes ready to make the change with you because the worst thing you can do is pressure him into this because he will just resent you then for ruining your friendship. What you should do is make a move on him if he responds back then he is ready to make the change from friends to more than friends but if he isn't he just doesn't like you in that way. If that happens play it off and pretend that wasn't your intention. BUT DO NOT FORCE HIM in to anything he might not want to do because that will ruin your friendship and any future possible relationships.
Good luck!!
2007-03-16 11:26:49 · answer #3 · answered by Micro spice 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your marriage may be failing but you are not yet divorced. You should take some time to get over your divorce before thinking of starting a new relationship. My advice is to take things really slowly and see if you both feel there could be a future for your relationship.
2007-03-16 11:22:27 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Life is full of risks, if you don't take them you will never know. I would advise you end you marriage, before you cross the line with your friend.Only because if you have loose ends you will not be able to devote the quality and time needed to make a relationship work with your friend.. Go TRUE LOVE!!!!!!!!!!!!
2007-03-16 11:23:57 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's worth the risk, but maybe get rid of your marriage first cause you obviously don't need to be cheated on, and if they're the "one" they will still be there when you're in the best frame of mine to be with someone new. If you wanna preview it, by all means, but if all goes well, emotions could get really complex while you're still technically taken.
2007-03-16 11:22:58 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
i think to decide such an important decesion , u should think , what r you going to lose when u quit on your marriage ? if its just collateral damage like money or a good house , then i think being with the one u love is worth the risk , but if your going to lose sentimentals or for example ur not sure u totally hate ur husband then i think u should wait give it a second try and if that fails then u knew for sure it wouldnt , good luck
2007-03-16 11:24:41 · answer #7 · answered by babyKitten 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your husband is cheating on you, and you are getting rid of him, then what is the risk? You vowed to be with your husband. Don't cross any big lines until you are divorce. But let your husband know that you are moving on.
2007-03-16 11:23:02 · answer #8 · answered by Alisha C 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
why cheat. its called a divorce. whats so hard about that concept. why stay in a relationship while getting with others. just end the first relationship so you can start the next. figure it out. you're 27, dont stoop to the level or your cheating husband.
2007-03-16 11:23:24 · answer #9 · answered by Stephanie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes. YOur husband is a @$$hole! Step 1: Divorse Step 2: Get new clothes and a hot crib Step 3:Get it ON!
2007-03-16 11:22:29 · answer #10 · answered by Alex C 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋