How do you get over your best friend?

Question

My best friend and i have been close for 3 years - it turns out we've secretly liked each other the whole time without even knowing it until now. We do care and have fallen for each other but we decided that we both weren't ready for a serious relationship. Yes, there were times where in between, we would hook up but THIS TIME, we had a serious talk and promised that we can't be "biased" about things and go back to being best friends. We're both happy that things are back to normal...but more him than me. I'm heartbroken because that guy i've been wanting/dreaming for was the one right next to me and i can't be with him. He seems more over it than me - he's just happy we're normal again...then it makes me wonder if he ever had a thing for me....i need to trust what he said because before he said that if we were to be together it would be a time where things weren't as stressful (degree, work, etc..) and he wants it to be serious and long lasting...

HELP ME PLEASE im aching...

Answer 1

Been there!!! 5 years here. Chances are very strong that he has something for you. But insecurities are a mofo! Honest truth. In the same situation right now, I love her and feel she is the one, but unforantly she too is just happy its back to normal. The reason I believe is insecurities that she has, deep, deep insecurities. I can't break her of it, but just being normal with me I believe is more then she ever thought she deserved so it makes it extremely hard for her to even see any other possiblities. The thing that hurts the most is no matter what drama we've been in, it continues to get more and more intense each time we conlide with each other. Yes some times we both were cold, but when things warm up they warm up hotter everytime. But do yourself a favor and understand that; IT is the natural thing when we get older and get past our insecurities for friendships to accully mature into something much, much better. Its natural and personally I think it works 10times better then the old ask a person on a date system. Because the biggest part of a relationship that goes unspoken half the time is the history. Which you can never put a price on and is extremely hard to make up with another person. But you know love and if things are clicking, let it flow together and give it another chance. Maybe it well show me that I still got a chance with mine.... Besides its better to be honest all the way about how you feel instead of trying to lock it inside yourself. Shoot thats what friends are for. So talk to the man and see if you got a friend or a lover there. Your heart well adventually thank you one way or another....