Toddler hurting herself?

Question

My daughter who is 4 1/2 has quite a temper, and when she is throwing a fit she sometimes hits herself. last time she bit herself enough to leave teethmarks. Anyone have ideas on how to deal with this? she does not hit or bite anyone else. thanks for everything!

Answer 1

Its going to be hard to do but completely ignore her. Your daughter is doing this for attention and when she gets a reaction from you you are playing into her hands. I know its easy for me to say but i can almost guarantee if you deal with her behaviour matter of factly and calmy it will stop. She wont hurt herself if mummy isnt making a fuss anymore. If you have other children make a fuss of them whilst she throws these tantrums to show her that only children who behave get your love and attention. Its common for children to use tactics like these, some hold there breath, bang there heads on the floor etc. Try ignoring it and see what happens. Praise good behaviour like crazy, she will soon learn that being nice earns your love and affection. Good luck x

Answer 2

My two year old son is going through the same thing but not as severe. Don't baby her when she hurts hersefl on purpose, that clicks in her brain and tells her if she wants you she has to bite herself. Throughout the day praise her for every good thing she does. When she starts her tantrums leave the room just make sure, (and I know you do) that there isn't anything there she could seriously hurt herself with. We did with Eli and he hasn't bitten his arm in a week. We got worried because he was starting to bite his sister. I think if you do this consistantly everything will work out. Don't take her to a shrink unless you feel nothing else is going to work....they have habits of delaying results so they can make money and most times make things worse.

Answer 3

I know that's difficult to deal with. Sometimes when my 3 year old gets mad she will pinch herself or scratch herself. I hate seeing her get like that and I'm hoping she will grow out of it. What u may need to do is somehow get her to calm down and talk to her. Ask her why she does this to herself and explain to her that it's not good or even that it scares mommy. Also, when you know that she is about to lose control you should try to stop her before she can do anything. Even if this means holding her in your lap and holding her arms or legs down. This is what I've begun to do w/ my little girl and it seems to help a little bit. Good luck!

Answer 4

She's a drama queen doing it to get attention. I suggest you punish her for this unacceptable behavior instead of giving her sympathy or trying to stop her from hurting herself. She won't do any serious long-term ER type hurts to herself, so don't try to stop her, just ignore her and put her in her time out or something.

And do this for at least a week. Don't do it for one day and say "oh, well THAT certainly didn't work"

If you are consistent, it should get worse on the first day, better on the second and almost gone by the third.

Answer 5

Well I would say that when she throws temper tantrums you can try to calm her,.. Done by wrapping your arms around her from behind and holding her firmly so she can't hurt herself while in a gentle voice you instruct her to take a deep breathe and count to five and continue this until she is calm.. I would say that she is probably very emotional and hasn't found an outlet for her anger.. You can also suggest that she scream into a pillow to release some of her tension, you really need to try to find an outlet for her that works.. maybe talk with your pediatrician I too had to deal with a "strong willed" child as I like to call them and these are some technics I had to use

Answer 6

I guess I used to do that, I remember saying I was going to bite my fingers off, eventually after my mom started to ignore me and I got older I realized that hurting myself didn't hurt anyone else, it was hard though, and took a long time, I remember that even after I stoped hurting myself physically, I still hurt myself, I would get mad at a teacher and just not do the work they asked for, but it took a while for me to realize that he didn't care if I did it or not he was happy to fail me though.

Answer 7

As a mother who has raised 4 children to adulthood.....Ignore her. It's no fun to bite yourself if no one is watching.

And 4 1/2 is too old to be throwing a tantrum. That's more along the lines of being a spoiled brat.

Answer 8

She is to old to be throwing fits! 2 yr olds do that. You need to punish her when she acts like that, it's not appropiate. You also need to find out why she is so frustrated. Encourage her to talk about what is making her so mad. Teach her the proper way to deal with anger!! You should have done something about this sooner, but at least you can get control before it's to late! Watch the Nanny shows, you'll learn how to give her effective time outs!

Answer 9

for my recommend if she ever has her mood tantrum i'd sit down her on the naughty step or day out for 2 minutes or 3 minutes bypass down the interest aspect and clarify why you position her on the naughty step u will favor to talk in deep voice tell her know your the boss if she is going off the naughty step save putting her there every time and she will be able to grant in on the accurate if she apologies to you she may grant you with a cuddles or says sorry.

Answer 10

she is probably stressed out and/or is probably really frustrated! she is feeling SOOO much emotion that she cannot handle the intesity of her emotions, so she bits herself to relvie the tension inside her body. u areprobably blessed with a deep feeler, who feel every emotion with GREAT intensity, just like me (i am a deep feeler too). congrats =)

try telling her to scream in her room, scream into a pillow, or hit the pillow


good luck