I've been seeing my boyfriend off and on for the past 41/2 years and I thought everything was going well, but I was asking about marriage and he said "I guess it's not in the cards for me" What does that mean?? Why are men so afraid of getting married???
2007-03-16 08:06:11 · 15 answers · asked by Melissa B 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I broke it off and ALMOST married my new boyfriend, but didn't.
I don't know why I came back to this guy...
He's 46, so any career is pretty much over.
2007-03-16 08:15:27 · update #1
It is the female worst nightmare having our mother's words blaring back at us " Why buy the cow if you can get the milk for free" We laughed about all those old fashion values we joked about it after all we have birth control and women's lib.(right) We forgot the like breast implants the pill was invented by a man too. Why do you ask and what does this have to do with the trend of men not wanting to walk down the aisles anymore? There couldn't be a correlation between our sexual freedom and men's marriage phobia(that always has existed) could it? Why yes, it is cause now they feel that they can get sex any where and anytime. Some of us women have even lost the art of getting a man to marry us oh, trust it is an art form that should be listened too. Now, don't get me wrong being independent is a good thing but we need to start leaving those that don't and get with the ones that will. We women need to have a conference and restate some rules on what needs to be done to bring these guys back to heel so that we can enjoy freedom.
Bottom line: He is saying that he don't know about you but as far as he is concerned he ain't getting married. What you need to do is any little domesticate duty you use to do stop it and advise him that " I guess cooking, cleaning,dating, having sex and taking care of a grown man that can't marry me is not in the cards for me."
2007-03-16 08:22:12 · answer #1 · answered by calmlikeatimebomb 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's not interested in being married. Plain and simple. Marriage isn't for everyone. My question is how are you just discovering this after 4 1/2 years? That seems like time enough to know someone's views on most any topic.
If marriage is something you want? Break it off with him in a friendly way and go date others. Don't blame him for knowing what he want's. Thank him for not marrying you when its NOT what he wants!
2007-03-16 08:11:01 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
That means that if you plan on getting married soon, this is not the guy for you. I don't know what the fear is, but I presume that some are afraid of losing the ability to "play the field" or freak out about settling down. I'm sure most of the stuff they hear about marriage is heard from someone who is unhappy in their own. NOT the best source.
2007-03-16 08:11:47 · answer #3 · answered by Rico 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First off, don't stereotype by saying that men are afraid of getting married. My wedding day was the one of the greatest days in my life, and I looked forward to it long before I ever popped the question.
As far as your guy's statement, he doesn't want to get married. He probably isn't ready to settle down yet, or he doesn't see the two of you staying together (which I could understand with your "on again/off again" history).
2007-03-16 08:12:58 · answer #4 · answered by Ritz Grimarren 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am 52 years old and the sad truth is many men dont want to get married {I know because a lot of younger fellows have confided in me} because they have no rights they lose their property and have no rights to their children. I am not speaking as a legal expert because I dont know for sure but that is the impression that a lot of men have and we all hate the family law court
2007-03-16 08:33:45 · answer #5 · answered by bill k 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's commitment. One thing I learned is that with certain men, they have a fear of being with only ONE woman. Or they have been hurt before, and fear the pain again. I would sit him down and talk about it. And if he NEVER wants to get married, then maybe you consider moving on. Don't waste your time for a guy who is not trying to grow and progress with you.
2007-03-16 08:10:37 · answer #6 · answered by S4tisf4ctionz 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Guys get married when they feel they have accomplished things professionally and when they are ready to get married. If you are young , like under 25 that would be the case for most guys.
2007-03-16 08:11:22 · answer #7 · answered by KID87 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
in case you suspect in saving your first time for marriage, and have held out this long, then stick to it. once you ultimately permit pass and share your self with the only right suited guy or woman, it ought to be explosive. i did no longer wait till marriage, yet ought to on no account on no account relish intercourse exterior of a deeply dedicated dating. only too old college that way perchance, yet by employing itself intercourse is isn't sufficient. With a deep sufficient love and have faith, that's excellent, and it fairly is problematical to have self assurance that the two could be a threat with somebody who won't make a dedication. i can not relate to the "guilt" situation, no longer whilst it involves intercourse. by employing itself, intercourse is only an activity, and has approximately as plenty inherent morality or immorality as a monkeywrench. the only right suited or incorrect of it fairly is what human beings carry with them, no longer interior the act itself.
2016-10-01 00:49:18 · answer #8 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Guys are idiots. I'm sorry but it's true. Every guy I know has done some sort of jackass nonsense when it comes to a marriage. They are weak and deep down they know this. It too hard not to be selfish. Its too hard to share a life with one. They'd rather share the wealth with all. It's all very childish.
2007-03-16 08:15:54 · answer #9 · answered by chelexhay 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Hello! at the 1 1/2 year mark you should have gotten a clue! he does'nt want to get married! Move on !
2007-03-16 08:09:51 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋