Dear Wife,
I'm writing you this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you
for good. I've been a good man to you for seven years and I have nothing to
show for it...
These last two weeks have been hell. Your boss called to
tell me that you had quit your job today and that was the last straw. Last
week, you came home and didn't even notice that I had gotten a new hair cut,
cooked your favorite meal and even wore a brand new pair of silk boxers. You
came home an d ate in two minutes and went straight to bed after watching all
of your soaps.
You don't tell me you love me anymore. You don't want sex
anymore or anything, either you're cheating on me or you don't love me
anymore, what ever the cause I'm gone.
Your Ex-husband P.S. Don't try to find me. Your sister and I
are moving away to West Virginia together...Have a great life..
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dear Ex-Husband
Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter.
It's true that you and I have been married for seven years, although a good
man is a far cry from what you've been.
I watch my soaps so much because they drown out your constant
whining and gripping. I did notice your hair cut last week , the first thing
that came to mind was "You look just like a girl!" but my Mother raised me
not to say anything if you can't say something nice.
And when you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me
confused with my Sister because I stopped eating pork seven years ago. I
turned away from you when you had those new silk boxers on because the price
ta g was still on them. I prayed that it was a coincidence that my sister
had borrowed $50.00 from me that morning...and your silk boxers were $49.99.
After all of this, I still loved you and felt that we could
work it out.
So when I discovered that I had hit the lotto for ten million
dollars, I quit my job and b ought two tickets to Jamaica. But when I got
home you were gone.
Every- thing happens for a reason I guess.
I hope you have the fulfilli ng life you always want ed.
My lawyer said with your letter that you wrote, you won't get
a dime from me.
So take care Signed...Rich as Hell and Free.
P.S. I don't know if I ever told you this but Carla, my
sister, was born Carl. I hope that is not a problem.
2007-03-16 07:58:01 · 21 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
LMAO!!!!!!!!! That is tooooo funny!! I'm going to have to share this with my friends and family! It's freakin' hilarious! lmao......thanks for making me laugh so dam hard today!!
2007-03-16 08:02:58 · answer #1 · answered by Incognito 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Good One!
2007-03-16 15:01:52 · answer #2 · answered by Lightning Striker 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hahaha.wat goes around comes around....sounds like something a guy would do 2 a gurl
2007-03-16 15:21:01 · answer #3 · answered by sweet angel 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
HA HA HA!! That is absolutely FABULOUS! I love it. Everything does it fact happen for a reason.
2007-03-16 15:02:44 · answer #4 · answered by woodkd1 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is so funny!!! 1 star for you
2007-03-16 15:19:11 · answer #5 · answered by heyyall 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
LMAO !!!!! That is too funny, the best one I read so far today.
2007-03-16 15:01:45 · answer #6 · answered by nikkid6910705 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
lol it's quite funny. the poor bastard got what he deserved
2007-03-16 15:03:19 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
LMAO great joke
2007-03-16 15:01:58 · answer #8 · answered by Dr Universe 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
very funny and could have been my wife lol
2007-03-16 15:07:37 · answer #9 · answered by full_strokes_baby 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Crazy! I loved it!
2007-03-16 15:06:38 · answer #10 · answered by exodosgurl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋