I've fallen in love with my boss and I'm not sure how to handle it???

Question

I am the personal assistant to my boss and we spend alot of intimate time together. Over time, we've become closer and closer. I think he loves me too but neither of us have talked about it.

The sexual harrassment policys are very strong where we work and he's in a Very Powerful position. He is currently single and I would like to know how he feels about me, but it's akward because he has ALOT to loose. How do I ask him how he feels about me?? I need to talk to him about it, but I don't know how to broach the subject. Help??????????

Answer 1

dont handle it.....maybe you can discuss this outside of work ....but if i were you i would let him bring up the discussion....but dont you say or do anything cause then you can loose your job and not be able to share these intimate time together any longer....so chill and no more intimate time and when he asks whats up then you spill the beans

Answer 2

This probably sounds very cut and dry. It's probably not what you want to hear. But: DO NOT GO THERE WITH YOUR BOSS. There is no upside. First of all, it will poison your working relationship. Even if things continue to go well between you two, your integrity will be compromised (sneaking around, letting personal issues affect your business decisions, etc.). If things go wrong between you, you will have to come to work everyday and answer to your recent ex. Not fun. I think most of us prefer that our private lives and work lives are separate and exist in two different worlds. If you date at the workplace, all the good, bad and ugly of both private and work life is mishmoshed together. Not something I'd want personally. And if this gets around, both your reputations will suffer and you could both be subject to discipline. Your boss is actually the one with the most to lose - dating a subordinate makes him a prime target for a sexual harassment claim. He's in the power position - you could easily claim that he pressured or coerced you into dating him (not that you would, but you could). All in all, it's bad idea. Your career and your love life deserve better. You guys can always be a great team - just keep it professional.

Answer 3

If I were you, while you are at the job site-I would leave well enough alone. You both have worked too hard to get where your at to someday take a chance of losing it all. Meaning that if you two were to ever get together and something were to go wrong, one of you would have to leave the company. Who might that be? Who has seniority, and is more important in the company? Think smart here! If you truly are interested, you need to leave the company and date each other. Sorry, it would be the only way the relationship would survive. So unless you decide to ignore your emotions, and start being only a business lady their like your suppose to be, I wouldn't be asking him anything.

Answer 4

Get a couple of tickets a few days in advance to some play or event that you think the two of you would enjoy. Tell your boss some friend had them and was called out of town and gave them to you and ask him if he would like to go with you to the event.
If he accepts you can then mention to him during the date that you really like him as a person and see how he responds. It is better to keep your private life and office life separate until you know how the other person feels about you.

Answer 5

You have to realize how important this job is to you. If you're really feeling like a relationship with your boss has potential and you're REALLY excited about it, maybe you could look into finding a new job. However, before I just quit my job at the toss of a hat, I would make sure your boss has similar feelings.

Maybe pull him to the side when you two are out of the office. Just tell him how things are.

Just make sure you're ready for this, because if he doesn't have similar feelings he could begin to feel uncomfortable around you and think that your feelings for him could affect your job performance. But, who knows, it may already be affecting it.

Answer 6

If you two spend a lot of time together you should tell him how you feel (assuming you two are alone). If he feels the same way, he'll tell you. If not, he probably won't report you because even though he may not love you, by spending time with you, he is most likely (at the very least) a friend.

Answer 7

If you approach him say after hours while not at work it's not sexual harrasment to approach him.

Besides, just bringing up your feelings for someone is not harrasment anyway...if you bring them up and act on them and he's not interested that is a different story.

It's not against the law to tell someone you have feelings for them...you won't lose your job for asking him to go out unless of course your office has a no dating policy.

Answer 8

Be very, very careful. Just think, how do most relationships end? Poorly. If you two start dating and break up, you are out of a job. If he really is special, perhaps you need to find a new job and let him know your feelings before you leave.
.

Answer 9

well it is great you love someone but i think that you should talk to him about it and see what he thinks of you and tell him to be honest and the matter that you two are working together and are spending time together is great BUT HE COULD LOOSE HIS JOB!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!even if it is his choice he could into some trouble so i think if you want him to keep his job than just stay friends but just talk to him about it.

Answer 10

approach it like there was no policy, or better yet, u make out and go on dates as ''friends"... but with all seriousness, if you truly love him, talk to him about it, there is no policy saying you cant talk about it.