on my vacation 7 months ago, i met this guy and we had a thing throughout the whole vacation. after vacation we talked when he contacted me, and then i surprise visited him in october. four months later, in february..i went to go visit him again. we made plans and he said of course he wanted to hang out and we went to his house. he told me how when i came to visit the first time it was like giving him a puppy and he kept asking himself..is it mine? can i keep it? and then it gets taken away from him:( we talked for an hour, without doing anything. when i left he texted me right away and said "thanks for coming cant wait to see you again." i happen to be going to college by where he lives in 5 months. he asked me if the next time i come is for good? i said i might be back in march and he said "oh thats only a month" at the end of our convo i said goodnight and have fun and he said "all my fun left already"..two days later he texted me again and we talked and he told me it doesnt matter what we do as long as he sees me. he has this whole idea of waiting to see me when im living near him for good. we spoke for about 2 weeks, and now these past 2 weeks we havent been speaking... is this normal to not talk? do you think he might be scared of his feelings for me and wants to wait until im there to develop our relationship even more?
2007-03-16 07:05:20 · 7 answers · asked by lindsay m 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
How old is this guy--or, how much older than you? He says an awful lot of the "right" things, so honestly, I'm a little suspicious! Especially when you add that all of those "right" things have been followed up by...silence.
Hmm. I don't really know what to make of this. It's a bit of a strange relationship anyway, lots of visiting on your part and all the right lovey-dovey words on his part as long as you're there, then...silence.
I've never known a guy who was truly interested to just withdraw like that. He sounds maybe a little too slick...like maybe he's got something else going on behind your back. It's possible, too, that he's preoccupied with other things, but most considerate people who truly care for someone will at least call and say, "Sorry I haven't been in touch lately, but my Grandma's in the hospital. I'll call you in a couple of days."
I'd back off if I were you. He knows how to get in touch with you. If he wants to, he will. Perhaps give him one more message, keep it casual, along the lines of, "Just wondered how you were doing." You might get a clue from his response (or lack thereof). Then...practice your own silence. Even pursue other guys if they interest you. Don't let your life come to a halt over this peculiar situation.
2007-03-16 07:16:38 · answer #1 · answered by katbyrd41 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds as if he was taken back by your surprised visit as an indication of how serious your intentions are for him. Since you sound like the one who made all the attempts to visit him and also to make plans on moving closer, he politely went along with this without giving serious thought to it. Once you actually set a date of your plan to move closer, he got scared. I feel your mistake was to pursue him without giving him the chance to pursue you too. You moved too fast and this can make a guy feel uneasy. Back off, take a few steps back and stop making plans of your own as if you assume your plans is what he wants. Give the relationship the space it needs to grow. Hopefully you have not chased him off for good. Best of luck to you!
2007-03-16 14:28:43 · answer #2 · answered by pictureshygirl 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Based on what you wrote, it seems like he definitely has feelings for you. Maybe he hasn't felt like that before so he is scared, or maybe things are moving too fast for him. Long distance relationships are hard, so maybe he does want to wait until you live near him to make it work... but it wouldn't make sense for him to stop talking to you all together. I would try to call him and if he doesn't pick up leave a voicemail voicing your concerns. Good luck.
2007-03-16 14:12:47 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think this is a long question, but I read it all. Just after time things slow down. I am sure once you guys meet again, those feelings will come back. You'll have fun and wonder why you even questioned it. Have fun!
2007-03-16 14:12:37 · answer #4 · answered by live, love, laugh often! 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The man might be hesitant to express his feelings for you He may also not desire to become deeply involved with you. I suggest waiting to see if he will call you. If you do not receive a call, then you know he is not interested.
2007-03-16 14:12:44 · answer #5 · answered by david42 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Girl It sounds like he is scared who knows with guys though They are so confusing!!!
2007-03-16 14:09:07 · answer #6 · answered by Sheri 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you are just f*ck booty call and you know it. plain simple
2007-03-16 14:10:57 · answer #7 · answered by franco vita 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋