My boyfriend is bi polar and I'm not sure how to cope?

Question

I absolutely love my boyfriend when he is in his "stable" moods. We get along great and have a wonderful relationship.

The only problem is during his "down" times. It's not an issue of anger or depression but more of being ignored. I really do honestly love "L" but how can I cope with the down times? He takes WellButrin but it only helps a little. "L" has a high tolerance against drugs.

Is there anyone else who is in a Bi Polar relationship? How do you cope?

Answer 1

i had a friend who was bipolor!! and he took meds too.... he was the koolist when he was stable. and he never told me one day.. until the day he just snapped on me.. and it made me hella sad like i didnt even noe what i did. so i feel ur pain =[

its the hardest thing and it took me forever to acept him again.. untill he told me he was bi polar and there was this part of me that was llike felt bad for him but we talked about it.. and now i ask him to tell me when hes having a down moment so it wont be all bad. and everything changed after that.
were best friends now.! =]

best of luck. my wishes to ya.!

Answer 2

It's great that you love your boyfriend. However, if you are looking into a long term relationship, possibly marriage, maybe it would be best to be his friend; best friend, or good friend, but nothing more. You must remember that this is possibly the man you want to spend the reast of your life with, and if you think about living with him, you'll have to constantly bear his "down" times.
If you DO think you can withstand that in a long term relationship, then you can cope by trying to understand how your boyfriend might feel. If you can do that much, finding the right way to rememdy his pain will be simple. Basically, find a sentence or something to say that will correctly counteract/soothe his mood.
Good luck and best wishes!

Answer 3

I have bipolar disorder and have never been in any sort of relationship since I was first diagnosed ten years ago. I am doing much better now and trying to find women to date. It is difficult I know, but just try your best to be there for him.

Also as a side note. He may not be properly medicated. I take three medications for my bipolar. Lamictal, Cymbalta and Geodon. Ask him to talk with his doctor about a mood stabilizer and an atypical anti-psychotic. He might even try Cimbryax a combination of Prozac and Zyprexa. He also might try Depakote which is an excellent mood stabilizer.

Good luck and G-d bless.

Answer 4

HI! I think that i can help you out a little bit. I am married and i have bipolar. When I'm in my down times I like to just hear that my husband loves me no matter what but I also like to be left alone for a little bit. As for the medication, i take seroquel and it does really help me.Just let him know that if he wants to talk about it to come to you and you will be there for him. Sometimes I dont want to lay on the couch or anything with him when in these moods, but i still like it when he hugs me and reassures me. Just know that he does love you and keep a positive attitude.

Answer 5

My mom and I are both bi polar. Thankfully the medication that I started on is a great fit for me. My mom was a different story though. She had to try a few different medications before she could find one that really helped her. Maybe you could talk to your boyfriend about trying a different one. I also understand how it is to have a bi polar boyfriend. I dated one for almost a year, it was really tough when he didn't take his medication, which was often. I think that once your boyfriend finds a good fit for him and takes is normally then things should definitely improve.

Answer 6

My hubbie is a manic depressant (bi-polar) and schizophrenic. And there are times when coping can be difficult, at first when he ignored me when he was down I took it to heart, now I don't take any notice. I am thankful that your bf does not have a anger issue with his bi-polar, my husband does and is now in jail AGAIN.

Answer 7

Many bipolar support groups are open to friends and family of people with bipolar disorder.

Two commonly recommended books you may find worth reading are "The Bipolar Disorder Survival Guide: What You and Your Family Need to Know" by David J. Miklowitz and "Loving Someone With Bipolar Disorder" by Julie Fast and John Preston. My listed sources are links to find the books in a library near you.

Answer 8

My mom is bipolar and refuses to take her meds. At least he's on welbutrin. I would see if maybe his psychiatrist can prescribe a different medication. There are SO many out there that can help, or different concoctions of them. Until you find the right balance chemically, I really recommend visiting a therapist yourself. It can really help you. Sadly, I have distanced myself from my mother because of her negativity and refusal to get help, but theapy has really helped me to disassociate when she gets into a low. I also found some great books at the library and online to help with bipolar disorder. I wish you luck and hope he finds the meds to help him chemically and that you both work through this together.

Answer 9

If alcohol is involved he must cut that out. This can spiral any bi polar into psychotic behavior, worse depression than ever. It will be hard to convince him of this but if this is the case, I would suggest it anyway.
Been there, seen everything, good luck and hang in there. you are to be commended.

Answer 10

He really needs a full evaluation by a psychiatrist or psychologist who knows how to treat him. Sometimes people have to try different drugs or combinations of drugs a "cocktail" to get it right. That's why you need an experienced professional to help him.