My son is 13 and he is starting to ask alot of questions about sex. I am scared because I think at times I am too blunt and if I do answer, it might shock him.
2007-03-15 15:28:13 · 6 answers · asked by dawnie s 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
You MUST be honest with him. If he's asking a question, answer him using the proper names for things, be honest, tell the facts and don't ever issue old wive's tales. (hairy palms, going blind, etc.)
I'd avoid the whole "sit down and make a big deal of it" thing parents have done for years. It tends to make kids nervous and embarassed.
If he asks you about sex while you're cooking dinner, keep cooking!!!! Don't stop -- it'll seem like a big deal to him an make him feel like he can't approach you.
Answer the question as if he were asking "Mom, where does gasoline come from?" or "Why are some people vegetarians?" These are good questions but would you sit down and draw diagrams and make these into huge issues? No! Treat sex questions the same way. Good, honest answers with as much info as you have but don't do anything abnormal to make him feel uncomfortable or you'll blow your opportunity to have an open-door policy with him for questions.
Of course you'll want to teach him about your morals and ethics that you have in your household/family. And you can definately include that into your answers, but don't be condescending about it and don't make the morals the big deal. He'll understand that sex is a no-no (and an off-limits topic) but he won't really understand what it is, what constitutes it, what the rules for disease/pregnancy control are. He'll just know he's not supposed to do it and therefore shouldn't admit to doing it, ever, w/o facing the wrath of mom and dad. So make it clear that, yes, there are rules for sex, but its just as important to be educated as it is to follow the rules. :-D
If he's old enough and brave enough to come to you with questions about a topic he's probably nervous asking about, then give him the respect he deserves by answering his quesitons in an adult manner.
Don't be condescending. Don't be intolerant or embarassed.
Its better to be too blunt and honest than to give the kid false information OR to make him ashamed of his body.
Let's not forget he could get any information from his friends at school. If he's taking the time to come to YOU and trust YOU for the right answers, you owe him the courtesy of being open, honest, and NOT making him embarassed or ashamed for asking.
I hope this helps.
2007-03-15 20:03:38 · answer #1 · answered by kerrisonr 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I started from the beginning. My daughter was curious when she was 3 and we just tell her things are natural...We dont make a big deal about it so it's not a big deal to them...whatever the question we answer (of course in a way that they can understand at whatever age) honestly.
2007-03-16 15:00:21 · answer #2 · answered by Melba 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
answer them when they ask. Put the terms in language they understand and correct any vulgar terms with the correct terms. Teach them respect is a part of it.
Ask him what he currently knows and then take his questions.
2007-03-16 03:30:26 · answer #3 · answered by AveGirl 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
u need to answer them when they start asking questions.... and give him the true, blunt answers..... u dont want to misinform him.... even if u dont do it on purpose..... answer him truthfully..... he'll find out the blunt truth even if u dont tell him..... u learn from friends and peers just as much as teachers in school......
2007-03-17 00:31:28 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
As soon as they ask or you see that they are maturing alot faster then normal. And as soon as the opportunity arises.
2007-03-17 00:08:23 · answer #5 · answered by manny 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
DEAR
THIS IS THE RIGHT AGE OK ASK HIM WHAT HE KNOWS AND THEN TELL HIM WHAT YOU KNOW OK
TAKE CARE
2007-03-16 04:53:00 · answer #6 · answered by ? 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋