ok, so my boyfriend of 2 years and I broke up about 4 months ago. After about a month of crying, as per the norm, we decide to be best friends instead. That works for about 2 omnths, on and off, and then one day we met to hang out. He's distant then, and later, he tells me online that he doesn't want to see or hear from me again. The next time we run into eachother, he avoids talking to me at all cost, and acts like he hates me. I know it's not his new girlfriend, since she is my best friend. What is going on?
2007-03-15 12:55:32 · 9 answers · asked by purrr:) 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
You already know the answer NEW GIRLFRIEND
2007-03-23 10:25:11 · answer #1 · answered by naseldrip 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Guys will often see failed past relationships as failures to their character. This may not be a concious thought, but the symptoms show and the inklings are back there in his mind.
That is unfortunate enough. But what makes it worse is that not only do guys write off old relationships as failures, but anything that is associated to that "failure" just reminds him of when he made himself vulnerable. Now, it's often spoken of how girls are usually more vulnerable emotionally. Don't leave the guys out of that basket. Within a close relationship a guy will show different aspects of himself to a woman that he wouldn't show to other people. He won't show these things outside of a relationship, so to see someone who reminds him of those vulnerable moments...well it hurts.
He doesn't hate you, he's not disgusted by you. He hates what has happened and is disgusted that he let a little bit of himself go. He feels a little less of a man whenever he sees you.
That is not your fault.
It just takes time and communication to get over. It will be a while, give him time to heal.
2007-03-15 13:03:56 · answer #2 · answered by Jared F 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Thats a rough one. Im going through something simular. Dating on and off for 4 years, very intense relationship. Somewhere along the way we got these ideals and expectations for each other. We cant get past it. Everytime we talk we get in an argument because all we do is remind each other of those expectations and how they are not being the person we expect them to be. I cant say exactly what the reason is, since im sure your case is differnt. But something about being around you must upset him. Mayby its just an ideal image of you that you dont meet. Mayby its guilt on his end over how he treated you... who knows. He might not even know why he feels that way. Thats how i am, i dont know why i have this ideal image of my ex in my head, and why talking to her upsets me. If i could find that out and stop it, id have my best friend back.
2007-03-22 22:58:10 · answer #3 · answered by David Parker 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
His new girlfriend may feel threatened by you (she's your best friend so she knows how nice a person you are); she may not have had to say anything at all to him - he could have just sensed she is insecure about you seeing him. So let it go. Ignore him as he's ignoring you. It's for the benefit of his new relationship that he's being this way and that new relationship deserves a chance. It will eventually peter out and then he may approach you to be friends again. But beware, his ex-girlfriend at that point will still be your best friend - it's just always going to be awkward.
2007-03-23 07:40:54 · answer #4 · answered by kathyw 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I have a Feeling it is One or more of his friends they Can be so controlling at times and they are often known to be the only things that kill a relationship. Or it could be Your friend is a back stabber
2007-03-23 10:45:26 · answer #5 · answered by Arc_Angel 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Next time you should have said no when he asked you for a second time. If this happens, the guy will turn around and disappear: great, if not, he would keep looking for you and asking you out so you would know that he is interested on you
2007-03-23 11:47:54 · answer #6 · answered by Marco 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
he's having trouble letting go of you so to get you out of his mind...you have to be outta sight
2007-03-15 12:58:38 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
FIND A NEW BEST FRIEND AND NEW BOYFRIEND
2007-03-23 06:46:16 · answer #8 · answered by Bettee62 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
HE HAS SOMEONE ELSE.
2007-03-23 11:09:54 · answer #9 · answered by GARY R 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋