A new priest at his first mass was so nervous he could hardly speak. After mass he asked the monsignor how he had done.
The monsignor replied, "When I am worried about getting nervous on the pulpit, I put a glass of vodka next to the water glass. If I start to get nervous, I take "a sip."
So next Sunday he took the monsignor's advice. At the beginning of the sermon, he got nervous and took a drink.He proceeded to talk up a storm. Upon his return to his office after mass, he found the following note on the door:
1.Sip the Vodka, don't gulp.
2.There are 10 commandments, not 12.
3.There are 12 disciples, not 10.
4.Jesus was consecrated, not constipated.
5.Jacob wagered his donkey, he did not bet his a.$$.
6.We do not refer to Jesus Christ as the late J. C.
7.The Father, Son, and Holy Ghost are not referred to as daddy, junior and the spook.
8.David slew Goliath, he did not kick the crap out of him
2007-03-15 12:42:27 · 17 answers · asked by maverick_youth 4 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
10. We do not refer to the cross as the "Big T."
11. When Jesus broke the bread at the Last Supper he said,"Take this and eat
it for it is my body." He did not say "Eat me"
12. The Virgin Mary is not called "Mary with the Cherry,"
13. The recommended grace before a meal is not: Rub-A-Dub-Dub thanks for the grub, yeah God.
14. Next Sunday there will be a taffy pulling contest at St.Peter's, not a Peter pulling contest at St.Taffy's.
-*-*-*
2007-03-15 12:42:58 · update #1
HAHAHAHA!!!!
2007-03-15 12:46:49 · answer #1 · answered by Jodi C 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Appears to be a good joke with bad event. I am afraid I cannot laugh at the name of jesus. Although I am a Hindu. But buddies I love Jesus in the same way as I like Shri Ram, Shri Krishan and I can not bear with any jokes of HIS name. Sorry if I soil your mood.
2007-03-16 02:39:53 · answer #2 · answered by BABA 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
A good one. Try more. It is hard to find guys congratulating girls for their jokes right.
2007-03-16 04:40:54 · answer #3 · answered by King of Hearts 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
try this on ur self 2
2007-03-16 15:04:03 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
good one not to many funny jokes out their but your's was really original and i enjoyed this one !!!! good job keep going!!!!
2007-03-15 19:54:29 · answer #5 · answered by alex t 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I like that one.
2007-03-21 14:09:57 · answer #6 · answered by levell 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
cute....but i thot the priest was gonna do sumthin stupid to the ppl!
2007-03-21 21:48:43 · answer #7 · answered by -MissyYo- 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yall crazy! thats so funny!
2007-03-15 19:52:55 · answer #8 · answered by Alicia 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
that was a good one :) have a good day!
2007-03-15 19:47:18 · answer #9 · answered by CaSeY LyNe 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
omigawd dude datz like da best joke i've read here! period!
roflmao!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2007-03-15 21:37:32 · answer #10 · answered by avg_jack 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
haha that was hilarious!
2007-03-15 19:47:55 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋