should i cancel a money debt of a friend? CHRISTIANS ONLY?

Question

I bought a hi-end stereo system for my friends car on my credit card as a loan. He owes me $2000. He currently has no job. I was reading the bible the other night and saw the passage saying forgive others debts as I(JESUS) forgive your debts. I currently dont have a job either but might come into some money in two weeks, should I forgive his debt and take a loss? Or make him pay me? He has paid very minimum payment last month. What should i do???

Answer 1

If he just got a $2000 sound system and his attitude is to make very minimum payments, he has some stinking thinking.

Too many times, friendships, and even marriages, have been destroyed by money matters. Is it uncomfortable for him to see you since he is reminded of the debt? That is when you should, as a christian, not make a big deal out of it ... but it still need to be taken care of.

Don't wait for him to clear that credit card debt ... you should put something into it as well. You will have the poor credit rating if that very minimum payment is late.

Don't let him see the credit card statement each month, just make sure he meets his obligations and keep the friendship non-focused on finance.

Answer 2

Well, first if all, when it says to"forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors", that is talking about our "sins/trespasses", not financial debts. He should pay you back, but if he doesn't you must forgive him. And I would be very careful about loaning money to friends or anyone else. Especially to someone without a job, and for something unnecessary like a car stereo. If it were a genuine NEED, I'd just give them the money.

Answer 3

Well--first of all, buying a luxury item for an unemployed friend on credit was irresponsibleon your part. Also dumb--as a practical matter that's a good way to lose money--and friends.

That being said, look at the Biblical story in its full context. Applied to our economics today, I would say this: first, if your friend is making even minimal efforts to pay--or if he is in a jam where he can't--you should not forgive thedept-but you should givem him as much time as he needs to pay it. Demanding faster repayment would apply only if he attempts to renege on his obligation.

Forgiving the loan is appropriate if-but only if--it becomes likely he won't be able to repay it at all, or not without suffering unreasonable hardship as a result (highly unlikely unless he becomes totally disabled or some other such disaster).

In this case in particular, your own welfare isn't relevant. You should have known better than to do this in the first place--and if waiting for the money is hard on you, consider it a lesson in financial responsibility.

Answer 4

Dear CPoppa,

I've seen several good answers so far and I must commend you for seeking Christian counsel on this situation.

I think I have to agree with Trible regarding good stewardship. It would be one thing if the debt were for essential things like food or medical expenses or housing or transporation for work. But a hi-end stereo system is an non-essential expense. To cancel the debt which he could not afford in the first place is enabling and I have learned the hard way that enabling is NOT a good thing to do.

Answer 5

first off I think you answered my response to your question already...WWJD? You eventually have to make your own decision but from experience I can personally tell you that when you do something like this as if it were for Christ (forgiving the debt) Somehow, someway you will ALWAYS get repaid. Now on the other hand I know that God expects us to learn from the situations that we go through and if this same friend came and wanted you to put something else (not necessities) on your credit card, in love I would tell them that you just aren't able to do that again. If they pay you back great!! and if not great because you just racked up some rewards from God and those are always the best kind!!!!

Answer 6

Listen, that whole 'turn your other cheek' deal when other people are taking advantage of you? No. Do not stand for it. You do that, people are going to be picking you up, tossing you down when they're done with you, and go about their business without a second thought. It's you who's going to have to pay the price, and you that's going to be miserable because of everyone taking advantage of your hospitality. That's not to say to be a jerk, either, but don't let people step all over you or get away with something just because you two happen to be friends.

Anyways, now that that's out of the way, it really depends on the circumstances. How old are both of you? Why do both of you not have a job? Does he not have a job because of a physical impairment? What? 2,000 is a large loss (at least to me) to choke down, but I guess depending on how close of a friend he is, you can choose to do what you want. But if you let him get away with it this time, he might try to do it again, and again, and again, and again... well, you know where I'm heading. Maybe you can bargain with him, and tell him to just pay half, or pay whatever he can, whenever he can. But to let him get away with it scot-free... I don't know...
Good luck on whatever you choose to do though.

Answer 7

Sound like it is his debt. If he agreed to pay for his toy that you foolishly extended him your credit for, then the agreement needs to be honored. The bible also says to pay your debits. Keep making payments on your credit because they certainly do not forgive debts. I am tired of my christian brothers and sisters trying to take advantage of me. I now have the policy of a legal contract when loaning anything that I need to get back.

Answer 8

The Bible also says," Neither a borrower nor lender be. " I would not forgive this debt. But you may not ever get it back, sorry to say. Especially if you are out of work. No, your friend should pay you back, if it's only a few bucks at a time. This has split up friendships, if you let it. But you are not being unchristian expecting to get your money back from a loan. It is unchristian to not pay back.

Answer 9

He should pay you when he can but you are a good friend to be concerned like that. Maybe you guys can work out a solution. You are a good person for wanting to relieve your friend's hardships. Your friend should also be kind and reciprocate. He should make some effort to help you also, but if he can not at all, forgiveness is better for you than anger towards a friend

Answer 10

you don't have to cancel the debt,forgive him for taking so long and just ask if he can pay as much as he can when he can. he atleast made the minimum payment for you,it may not be ideal but you can see him making an effort,you both are in need so be patient.