No recollection of something I did?

Question

I was very upset yesterday about something and I remember considering e-mailing the Samaritans, but have absolutely no recollection of actually writing or sending an e-mail to them. But today I've had a reply from them, so I must have.........

It's really freaking me out that I can't remember it - I have no idea what I wrote in the e-mail, and absolutely NO memory of having written it in the first place.

I don't use any recreational drugs and I hadn't been drinking alcohol at the time. I do suffer from depression and anxiety, and I do have a tendency to dissociate slightly when I'm very distressed, but not to the extent of having no memory of an event.

Has anyone else ever experienced this? Why can't I remember writing to them? It's really scaring me :o(

Yes, I did ask this on the mental health board a couple of hours ago, and I remember doing it, I just can't stop thinking about it and wanted a few more opinions - is that so bad??

I'm on venlafaxine for the depression/anxiety, but I've been on the same dose for the past 12 months and never had any similar episodes, so I don't think it's likely to be related to medication.

Oh, and I'm only 24.

Answer 1

I have had many similar things.

I suffer from severe depression and anxiety, but when things get particularly bad, I 'black out'. Its odd, but I just stop processing things and have no memory of them. The memories never come back either.

I'll have an arguement with my patner, and then cry/drink myself to sleep. When I wake up, I've got no memory of it, and carry on as normal with him till he explains.

When people get mad at me when I've done something wrong, I don't remember. I've got absolutely no idea why my last relationship ended - we argued and he left. I don't know why or what happened.

I also suffer with dissociation disorder, so it likely is related. Its strange that I can function and do so much when my mind isn't there.

If you are seeing a doctor, you should mention it to them. I'm waiting to see a specialist so don't really have any idea why this happens or what to do about it. Just wanted to let you know that you aren't alone and that other people get this too. It is scary, but I'm getting used to it now. It started happening to me when I was sexually abused at 11/12. I know it happened, but can't actually remember very much about it. Its very strange.

I'm on AD's too - lofepramine at the moment, but I've been experiencing this whilst I've been on other types of medication and when I've not be taking any. I'm only 20, so I don't think its 'senior moments'! You might consider asking for more opinions at the forum here: http://www.crazyboards.org/forums/
Its mainly american, but there is a dissociation disorder section that has some very knowledgeable people about. Hopefully you'll be able to find some reasurrance.

Answer 2

Don't worry Jen - at least you are getting an offer of help, so concentrate on that. You may just have had a 'senior moment' - which can occur at any age, but especially when you are stressed. I once poured the boiling water from the kettle into the tea caddy and then put the teapot back into the cupboard - no idea why! I hope you soon feel better.

Answer 3

I have done things like that in the past, but, much worse. I would come out of a "blackout" Somewhere completely different from where I was. I found out that certain things were triggering this and I started to undergo hypnosis. I haven't had a spell in about 12 years now. Try to think about what the last thing you remeber doing is and see if there is a connection to you blanking out.

Answer 4

Hi,I has a similar experience only mine was after a car crash.
It come on 2 to 3 months after crash I do not know what happened for 2 days & that was over 30 years ago.I stilll do not know what I did reading your question brought it back.Try to forget it,it will take time but you will eventually put it to the back of your mind.Good Luck

Answer 5

Aah I'm sorry you are feeling bad if it is a worry to you then it's important to you, just try and relax maybe if you give them a call and talk to them as they are understanding. I don't know much about anti-depressants I do take amitriptyline 20mg at night to enhance my painkillers. Just call them and even if you feel a bit silly they will put your mind at ease they deal with some awful things so try not to worry too much. You take care now.

Answer 6

u said u suffer from depression, are u on any meds for that? if so it may be a side effect . if your not taking any meds then u should speak to a doctor about it. i don't want to scare you anymore but it could be anything from a "mini stroke" to simple exhustion. I hope you find your answer though and i'm sorry i can't be any more help than that.

Answer 7

are youn on any new medication? chances are a practical joke. dont freak out. if you did write the email then you did if you didnt you didnt! you are here in reality reading this email. anxiety is horrid. diazapam is great when used carefully also dosulpien is a good a.d. for anxiety and its freaky thoughts!

Answer 8

don't be scared all of us do very unusual issues even as our minds are below pressure. I too emailed the Samaritans one low evening and did not shop in ideas it till I were given the answering e mail. in simple terms placed it right down to the undesirable day. melancholy performs havoc along with your memory and that i even must have a "bible" with each thing I definitely have executed in the course of the day so i remember I definitely have executed them.

Answer 9

Because I am a telepath and I erased your memory of it...
Duh...

Answer 10

so just apologise to them