Guilty or not?/Staying or leaving?

Question

I'm a female, 18 years old and yeah, I don't know what I'm telling it but this might help answering.
Did you ever call your dad names just because he was being mean to your mum and being really impolite and just a total loser? Well I did.. and I don't know if I should feel guilty, I'm not anyway. I used to think hey I'm lucky for having a dad some don't.. but what is the use when he's never there when I'm sad angry or upset? or he never asks me about my future plans? I really don't care anymore.. should I just move from here with my mom and get a job to give her every happiness or stay in this house and show him what I'm capable of infront of his eyes? I know people won't really like to meet us if we got separated, no one likes broken families.. I just don't know if I should stay or step away and take my mother out of this hellhole, would it make things better for her?

I meant, "I don't know why* I'm telling it", sorry

Answer 1

Your mother is lucky to have a child like you.
Dont make one move without talking to your mother and see what it is that she wants.
If she is ready to move, do so but if she is not, dont force her as you will be quite disappointed if while you are busting your butt, your dad comes to his senses and begs your mother back.

Also before you make a move (assuming your mother wants to go) be sure to talk to an attorney. You might find that your mother is entitled to some financial support from your dad. that would be a great help.
Best of luck to you and your mom.
p.s.
People do not care about broken families
they are most concerned about the KIND of people that you are
you soound like a great person so it wont be an issue!

Answer 2

you might be angry with him...and you should....but dont make any dessision when your angry...you might do things that would make you fell sorry and regret later
dont guoge him only with your last conversation with him...."that's something life tought me"...try to remmember all these 18 years that you considered him as your father .... and the good things he done to you.....and try to know what your mother think too......and you might chenge your mide...after all...he is your father and the husbend of your mother...the one that she chose to be her husband and the father of her children.....
but If it's too bad...then seperation would be the best for all of you...just be sure if it's what your mother wants
but still the money would also be a problem then...unless she has a job

Maby he is angry for some reason...like work...and his anger is afftcting on his family life...I know that very very wrong...but no one is perfect....some are even much wors
you might think that he doest care about you....I donno...maby he doest know how to show his love to you and to the family....and he is loving you in an other way...like not letting anythig missing you...food ... clouthes......worm home in winter...and other stuff...and working hard to give the family evrything it needs...

OK...in my case...I dont really care about my parents relationship...I never did...I'm 18 too....and I have passed like 10 years living alone with my brother and sister.......I only see my dad 8 days evry 4 monthes....my mom dont really care about me...or my dad.....just his money...my dad dont ask me anything about my life too...or pays any attention to my school problems....
the only thing that makes me think that my dad still love me...is that he buys me evrything I want and never shout at me

PS:
1)I'm not telling that your dad is wright....just dont rush in dessisions
2)If you have any brother or sister...you might ask them what they think too

Answer 3

it's not up to you to tell your mom what to do. he may be your dad, and you have your own feelings about him, but ultimately, it's up to your mom to decide what she wants to do with her life and with her husband. she should be able to speak for herself, if she does not like the way he handles himself with her. it's a shame he doesn't take part in you life, and you feel that he is handling you mom badly, but this is something for your mom to put in perspective. hang in there, we have all gotten mad at our dad and mom, it's the feeling of the moment. but, talk with you mom, let her know what you think of what your dad is doing to her, ask her how she feels and what she thinks of what he is doing. let her give you her answers. staying or leaving the house is up to you, do it for the right reasons and not just because you happen to be angry at this moment of your life with him. make these decisions with your mom, and let her be the one to talk over her feelings of the way she is being treated by her husband.

Answer 4

Wat does your mother think of this does she want to get away from him cause i think u will find that she wont because even though he mistreats her that is her home and her haven she feels secure there.