My perception is that white girls get defensive when approached by a black man in a bar or club?

Question

I'm black and in my area the bars there are predominantly populated by caucasians, of which I find no problems with, however, it seems that when I try to approach the girls, they are appear defensive and some of the guys look at me warily. is this all in my head or do people find it offensive. I have no racial qualms with anybody, i understand we are different racially, but it shouldn't be an obstacle

Answer 1

It all depends on the culture of the area. Where I live, it's a mixed vibe. Some of the caucasian women actually hunt down the black men. Some would never be seen with one and vise versa. You have to realize that most white people do not know anything about blacks except what they see on TV or read. And you know most of it is a misrepresentation of blacks as a whole. So they may feel superior or intimidate. And when people feel that way...they tend to steer away from what is making them feel that way. In your case........black men. Don't be offended, it's crazy that things are still this way, but it's the way it is babe.

Answer 2

My sister married a white dude and we all love him, he's one of the family, so we not all like that. I honestly don't care as long as the black woman I see a white dude with ain't my wife, lol. There's a lot of self-segregation in the black community and an intolerance to outsiders. It's stupid, but to a lot of black men, a black man with a white woman is viewed as a sort of justice: something he's taken from "the man", while a white guy with a black woman is seen as a hostile intrusion into the black community. Sorry to say, but the black community struggles with progress too. The idea of "color-blindness" is something many black people expect of other races, but feel no obligation to live up to themselves.

Answer 3

well I am sure that does exist, I was actually accused of overreacting whenever I was approached or had to walk through a crowd of white men. I had just read some true and very scary book about serial killers and shared it with everyone at work. anyways my ex husband was annoyed cause whenever we walked past clean cut college type middle to upper class white men,I'd grab my purse tight and walk fast or cross the street.

my friend at work was white guy and he was afraid of white guys after reading the book, cause charming ,good looking well dressed,clean cut, educated men are like the typical serial killer type.

anyways, I dont do that anymore, point is we react differently to groups or people who are from different social groups than ours or based on what we read or see. Racism is wrong but it is real and you are deluding yourself if you don't think it is alive and well or institutionalized today

Answer 4

Alas, there are negative stereotypes that still exist and I think the girls may appear defensive because they are actually a little scared or insecure. It's not fair to pre-judge people, but it still happens and until they allow themselves to get to know you, those that pre-judge will often see "scary black man" instead of a regular guy approaching them as often occurs in bars.

Try not to get too frustrated...it may be a while yet before the stereotypes are significantly diminished or gone.

Answer 5

It's not offensive, but some people just grew up socializing within their own race due to either upbringing or surroundings. No, it shouldn't be an obstacle so don't let it be for yourself, just do what you do. You can't change everyone's mind.

Answer 6

Have you given some thought as to how you approach the ladies. Perhaps you are too direct or forward, aggressive and insistant - no one likes to be cornered. If this is not the case, have you considered letting the ladies approach you.

Answer 7

White fuys don't like it when black men hit of white women. And white women know this, that is why they are defensive. It may not be the politicaly corect responce, but they are scared of being stero-typed.

Answer 8

i feel maybe they shouldnt be there if they dont want that slight chance that they may be approached by a black male.unfortanutely, some people are anal and can only see their way which is nine out of ten wrong!!dont take it to offense those people you dont need to be around any ways!!

Answer 9

maybe it shouldn't be an obstacle for u but surely is for white girls. i know it would be for me. i wouldn't be defensive but i would tell that i were seeing someone even if i weren't

Answer 10

if she gets defensive shes either got a guy or is a stuck up prude *****