A bee is seen going from limb to limb collecting nectar as the Bradford Pear Trees begin to blossom as Spring time approaches and the temperature rises in Arlington, Texas.
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If you have suggestion on how this could be written better please help.It is a cutline for a photograph.
2007-03-15 08:52:50 · 12 answers · asked by PenandPaper 1 in Education & Reference ➔ Other - Education
it might be better this way, its your choice though,
As springtime approaches and the temperature rises in Arlington, Texas, a bee is seen going from limb to limb collecting nectar as the Bradford Pear Trees begin to blossom.
2007-03-15 08:58:42 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
In Arlington Texas, springtime is approaching and the temperatures are rising. A bee is seen going from limb to limb collecting nectar as the Bradford pear trees begin to blossom.
2007-03-15 09:00:30 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
As spring approaches and the temperature rises in Arlington, Texas, The bradford pear trees begin to blossom, and a bee is seen buzzing from limb to limb collecting nectar
2007-03-15 08:59:24 · answer #3 · answered by annamaria9521 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As Springtime approaches and the temperature starts to rise in Arlington, Texas, the Bradford Pear Trees begin to blossom, and a bee can be seen going from limb to limb collecting nectar.
2007-03-15 08:57:07 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
A bee collects nectar as the Bradford Pear tree blossoms and springtime approaches Arlington, Texas.
2007-03-15 08:59:46 · answer #5 · answered by JENN K 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A bee is seen going from limb to limb, collecting nectar. The Bradford Pear Trees began to blossom as springtime approaches and the tempurature rises in Arlington, Texas.
Thats my advice to ya
2007-03-15 08:57:56 · answer #6 · answered by monkeyluver13 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's a run-on sentence, and in passive voice... maybe try something like:
A bee collects nectar from blossoming Bradford Pear trees as spring approaches and temperatures rise in Arlington, Texas.
2007-03-15 09:03:46 · answer #7 · answered by Megs 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
that is a run on sentence. could you make it into 2 sentences, and it still be appropriate for the rest of the paragraph? A bee is busily collecting nectar from fresh blossoms on Bradford Pear Trees. Spring is quickly approaching, and the temperatures are starting to rise in Arlington, Texas.
2007-03-15 09:02:36 · answer #8 · answered by pandora078 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, I think this is gramatically correct, but it makes it sound like someone who saw the picture is now writing about it. It should be more present tense, and more about the specific bee. For example: The bee is fluttering from limb to limb of the Bradford Pear trees, as they begin blossom in the new, fresh, spring air of Arlington, Texas
2007-03-15 09:01:02 · answer #9 · answered by Andrew D 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As spring approaches in Arlington, TX the temperature rises and the Bradford Pear Trees begin to blossom. Here a bee, moving limb to limb, collects their nectar.
If it has to be a single sentence, "...blossom, and here..."
2007-03-15 08:58:29 · answer #10 · answered by Burch 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋