I get along w/ him but he loves me and i don't feel the same. I want my kids happy they want us back together. What should i do?
2007-03-15 08:42:51 · 31 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Take this from me and listen to this carefully. I got married 22 years ago and stayed in the marriage for my kids and it was the wrong move.
Children need to see loving parents in a relationship that is mutual and complete. If your marriage has rocky roads then your children grow up seeing this and it effects them later in life as it did mine.
It makes children insensitive to what relations are versus how they should be, but never grew up in that environment.
It is best for children to see their Mother and Father loving each other and being good role models for their children and they learn from that.
If they see arguing or disagreements constantly and or see their Mother crying and in pain that is bad.
They need love and so if I had left and my wife found another husband that would love and cherish her as she wanted my kids would of seen what a real relationship of love truly is and they learn from that.
So my advice to you is don't stay in a relationship just for the kids because it teaches them the wrong things.
Your in a catch 22 situation and you ant what is best, but in the long run when children grow up visually seeing with their own eyes and feeling the love that comes when two people marry that is what they need.
2007-03-15 08:51:53 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
How long have u been apart from him???
How do u feel about him now?
He tell u he LOVES u, but what about u??
I think u should think things threw there was a reason y u both broke up. Don't just go by what he tell u. Go by his actions.
Yes his the father of Ur kids he will always b.
Don't make the same is take if u don't feel the same u should not do it. Move on with Ur life. Be honest with him and tell him y u can't..... Stop the games and be a woman take care of Ur kids and Ur self.
If u do go back get family Canceling ....
Good luck!!!!!
2007-03-15 15:51:44 · answer #2 · answered by Natural 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO! Not if that is the only reason...your kids will learn to be happy with you two each happy leading your own lives...who is going to be happy if you are with a man you do not love? You won't be happy...he may be happy for a time but that'll pass when he finds nothing he does makes a difference in your happiness...so now you are unhappy and he is unhappy...what are the chances of the kids being happy?
Never get together or stay together "for the kids" if you wouldn't do so if kids weren't involved...that more often than not tends to be a losing deal for everyone involved.
2007-03-15 15:47:56 · answer #3 · answered by . 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should do what is best for you. If you do not love him, then it would be a loveless marriage and you would likely be miserable. You broke up for a reason and if that issue has not been resolved, then it will come back to haunt you. You can have a meaningful relationship with him and allow your children to do the same while living your own life. The both of you could work out a way for the children to make the most of the time with both of you.
2007-03-15 15:49:13 · answer #4 · answered by fly guy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't stay/get back together just for the kids. Do you want them growing up seeing you two not in love? What kind of relationships is that going to lead them to have? You can both lead an active role in your children's lives, without being together.
2007-03-15 15:47:16 · answer #5 · answered by Valerie S 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Dont go back.......I am sort of in the same situation. My son's father wants me back after we have been seperated for about 3 years now. (We were together for 4-5 years). He is doing worse now then he was back then, so definitely not for me. Besides....we get along alot better now...lol. Go Figure!!
Dont do it!!! Keep moving on........dont use the children as an excuse to get back together, it did not help when you were already together, RIGHT? Think about it.......Peace
2007-03-15 15:49:21 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
your kids will not be happy if you only go back for them! You have to keep you happy for the entire family to be happy and function properly!! All kids want their parents to get back together, that does not mean it is the best thing for anyone! Do what is best for you and it will also be the best thing for your kids! Best wishes!
2007-03-15 15:48:26 · answer #7 · answered by wish I were 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Kids should NEVER be the reason you're with a man!! If you aren't happy they wont be happy!! Be good civilized friends and if that doesn't work with him then @ least you and your kids know later that you tried...in time they will adjust but as always it's going to be hard on all of you! Good luck!
2007-03-15 15:51:19 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Absolutely not! Coming from experience, you and your kids are better off without him. If he is your ex, there had to be a reason that you guys split. The kids are not a reason to get back with someone.
2007-03-15 15:47:43 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you don't feel right with him, don't get back with him, maybe try going to the park with your kids and him, then you'll figure out if it is meant to be, if it isn't just spend days together with your kids and do something fun that you all can enjoy.
2007-03-15 15:48:29 · answer #10 · answered by lovepink8080 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋