Some time ago I met this girl at the spiritualist church that I go to. She was down and asked what was the matter?
She told me that she was not getting on with her hubbie. I asked do you want to talk about it?
I gave her my mobile no.
Two days later she rang me. She suggested we meet up.
I accepted but I did then say listen I do not mess around with married women.
She no said It's nothing like that.
Anyhow we met up and over a period of time we became very good friends. Her hubby got to know about us and asked her to stop seeing me. She instantly shot him down by telling him there was nothing going on.
I now have to admit that we did kiss. But nothing else happened. There was no sex ( and I emphasize that)
Can I ask the girls who are reading this what is your opinion of this scenario?
Do you think that it was ok in the circumstances as above or do you think that I should have knocked it on the head.
Or the opposite side of the coin
Do you think she was after an affair? The friendship has finished
Or do you think I was slow in this situation?
Any answers appreciated
2007-03-15 02:41:34 · 13 answers · asked by Walter 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I would have to say that yes it may not always work out to be in that situation, but on the other they can be the best friendships to have. But if her husband asked her to stop talking with you, there is insecurity in that marriage and you did the right thing to walk away, I don't know if she was looking for an affair or not but good for you!
I am married and have been for almost 10 years, my best friend is a man who is also married and has been for 15 years, my husband knows I chat with him and I am open about it, if there was something that I was hiding it would be different.
2007-03-15 03:00:05 · answer #1 · answered by Tammy N 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
possibly.... but a kiss doesnt really constitute an affair now does it? however I think any women spending that much time alone with another man, when she is married, is a bit sussed.
I do think you've done the right thing in ending the friendship though - if you're not sure what she was after - then theres no point in tempting fate.
xx
2007-03-15 02:54:16 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Keep the friendship if it's not causing any concerned party any pain or hardship, but cool off the kissing bit nor any idea of taking it further at this uncertain stage. Only you and this girl know how serious is the relationship & how far it should or possible to go.
2007-03-15 03:05:03 · answer #3 · answered by MoiMoii 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're not a wimp.
In fact you sound scarily like my flat mate, he is also a "spiritualist", in fact he's also a spiritual healer & he spends most of his time on-line chatting to his female mates (he met them on a dateing site) with no intention of going anywhere with them, just feelinjg bad about them 'cos they're feeling down & he feels it is his duty as a friend to cheer them up.
In fact when his light humour & intrerest in their woes dosen't instantly thrill them into giggles he feels he has failed in some way!!!
You were straight with her from the start, you weren't interested in a relationship with a married woman.
Accept that it was a 1 way friendship which is now over BUT I THINK YOU & EVERYONE LIKE YOU IS SWEETNESS ITSELF!!!
2007-03-15 03:21:44 · answer #4 · answered by Bubbly Blonde 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think you have done the right thing to stay away you deserve to be somebodys number one not second best, plus its not worth the hassle messing with somebody who is married especially if there are children involved, if the marriage is in trouble, she shouldn't be going to other men to talk about it, it looks like she was after an affair all along to me,anyway you get out there and find yourself a girlfriend all of your own....good luck
2007-03-15 02:54:17 · answer #5 · answered by ♥~shona~♥ 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like she just needed someone to talk to, you offered her friendship and she accepted - they only thing wrong here is the fact that she kept her new friendship a secret from her husband, who was bound to think there was more to it than there actually was.
Think its sad that you have both lost your friendship with each other though.
2007-03-15 02:53:48 · answer #6 · answered by luz2loz 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think you were slow in this situation; plus you call yourself religious and you have an affair!?
2007-03-15 03:24:46 · answer #7 · answered by Mrs Stevo 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You did the right thing. Forget it now. friendships like that are doomed from the beginning.
2007-03-15 02:52:03 · answer #8 · answered by Invisible 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No you are not a wimp! Perhaps naive.
If you want to help people try joining the Samaritans.
2007-03-15 03:00:20 · answer #9 · answered by tinamon357 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
even helping each other spiritually it is advised that males help males and females help females. we are human beings and the more opposite sexes spend time together the more feelings develop. so wat i tell is u did a good thing ending the comminucation and please dont let urself be in such a situation again,
2007-03-15 03:06:03 · answer #10 · answered by vfm 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋