So confused on what to do?

Question

There's alot of info so: I was diagnosed depressed about 3-4 years ago when I began cutting, on & off different meds since, etc. I am still depressed (though I don't like talking to others about it, so some, like my mom, think I'm over it it seems), I off & on have periods where I get really low &/or suicidal. I've been in a bad way for almost all of the last three years, but I've gotten another really bad period recently of feeling suicidal for months I believe (it's hard to tell when I'm just depressed or when it is more serious, I'm so used to depression), & I dropped out of highschool (was 11th grade) partway through 2nd semester '07, cause I couldn't take it. So that's some background on me. Here's the situation: I've told my friends (5) & my mother at different times before of suicidal thoughts, nothing to much happened though. Now, one of my friends tells me that she thinks she may be on the verge of suicide, & that she hates everything, not just school. (Note: Alot of my problems come from bad relationships, like I often feel belittled & walked on when I'm around my friend, causes alot of anger towards her, worthlessness on my part, etc, & I've been more upset at her lately, & I feel kinda suicidal, so I'm not in the best spot to help her). I told her she needed to get help (I don't follow my own advice), not to ignore it though she said it was just pmsing or something, that she needed help cause no one deserves to feel like that, etc. That was like a week ago, don't know what to do now. I've been in a bad way (with lots of problems with her and other friends, that I don't tell them about, btw others agree that my friends do mistreat me, but I can't abandon them) myself, and now she says she may have same prob as me, I'm angry towards her (not for suicidal thing, because of how shes treated me in the past for my cutting, depression, ignoring my probs & such), and I don't know what to do. I have a shrink, but not to comftorable bringing this up (I have huge prob talking to ppl about my feelings, cause i got tired of ppl saying I was stupid & stuff) with him, I think I need quick help, same with her, but I don't want to betray her trust, & sometimes she tends to over dramatize things, & she thinks it is just a passing thing, I'm so confused. In the past she seemed to think I was lame for cutting and being depressed (she said things like my mom was way worse off than I), so I think it's weird that she is talking about this when she seems to act like it is some overdramatic emo thing. Also confused, cause 3 of my other friends have told me that at some time in there life they have thought of killing themselves seriously, or half attempted, so I feel that maybe it is just norm? And I'm kinda worried about one of those 3 that moved an hour away from us (a few months ago) and she has told me she is really lonely and stuff, but she also says it is pms. Any help? Sorry this is so long, I just don't know what to do. Thanks

Answer 1

You CAN tell your therapist anything about yourself, as long as it is the truth, and bears some relevance to your problems. Put it down on paper and read it, if you have to. He wants to know, and it is important to the success of your treatment. Suggest to your friend that she seeks therapy as well. Give her the following resources, and keep a copy or two for yourself and your other friend: phone 1800 suicide or 1800 lifenet http://www.suicidepreventionhotline.org & http://teenline.org/ [phone (074)NEW - TEEN] & http://www.lollie.com/bluesuicide3.html Cutting: 1800 dont cut http://www.focusas.com (.com/selfinjury.html) & http://www.palace.net/~llama/psych (/psych/injury.html) Join at www.myspace.com (free) Click on "groups" and select "other", then type "self harm" in the bar, and choose a group, maybe changing later, or starting your own for you and your friends, possibly exchanging IM or email addresses. Yahoo; groups & Google; groups as well. When you feel the need to cut, put a ruubber band around your wrist (for a few minutes, max), extend and release, or draw a red line across your wrist, or hold an ice cube in both hands, and grasp.

Answer 2

Sounds like you and your friends all need to calm down. Try to get over your reservations to talk to people. Especially each other, cause you all really need someone right now and it sounds like ya'll could be a support group to each other. I think it's normal to think about suicide when your young and not sure what to do, but it's definately NOT OKAY to do. Honestly (that's the wuss way out and doesn't work because you hurt the people that actually matter more then anything). If you need someone to talk to that's a bit older, but went through some of the same things ask a question that just says "D" and I'll answer with my e-mail address. Please don't ever feel alone 'cause even though some people don't understand you doesn't mean they don't love you!

Answer 3

hullo
if you feel good about cutting your self ,and if this decreases your depression,then you might be suffering from borderline personality disorder,in which people have depression,self harm,and suicidal gestures.if this is so,then you should ask your therapist for drug treatment(anti depressant)like Effexor 75 mg per day with long term supportive psychotherapy.

Dr solo