Boyfriend never pays for anything...Am I over reacting?

Question

I've been with my boyfriend for almost a year now, and he is a nice guy. But he always seems to never have money when it comes to doing stuff together. I always end up paying for everyting. And though I'm not asking for him to pay for everything, it would still be nice. Because I do not have much money myself after my bills, so what we do is limited. And I've only gotten a stuffed bear from him for valentines day. He didn't even have money to spend on me for my birtday. I bought dinner and a movie. Should I dump him? I mean, its not his totaly fault his doesn't have much money......but why couldn't he save a little bit to do something every once in awhile?

Answer 1

if he is a poor boy who has no funds at his disposal, you need not abandon him or other wise, if he were a rich guy, and does not spend any thing , leave him .

Answer 2

Hang in there.

Be careful of dumping your guy for the wrong reasons.
My boyfriend never had a stable job until he met me and we were friends before as well and as far as I am concerned with his history, he even refused to go out on dates with girls because he never had any cash to even take them out for a regular coffee.

However, for the past year that we've been together, he made sure his wallet was almost never empty. Maybe a little pressure from my part helped though in terms of "acting" like a girl who wants to be taken care of and not settling for anything less.

SO you are right in a way to expect him to save a little for your outings because men are supposed to bring in the finances, at least more than the women. Unless you want to be the sugar mommy.

Just don't settle for it if you don't want to. If there are holes in his pocket, i.e. his money just goes into illicit drugs consumption, gambling, alcoholism, then this is where you could rethink your relationship over, unless you really want to be a mom and help him get out of his misery. Trust me, it is not easy.

But honestly, money... it's all over the place, but you just have to bend your back and pick it up. Laziness will get you nowhere.

Answer 3

WOW! I would seriously think about finding a guy who...at the end of the day, appreciates you and puts a priority on investing not only time and attention to your relationship but money as well. You are not overreacting. I'm no love doc but I know most guys love to spend money on thier girls...thats just what you do. Sure the girl can pay EVERY once and awhile. But come on honey, don't you deserve to have dinner bought for you on your birthday. Move on.

Answer 4

You are not overreacting, especially if you have brought this to his attention. A young man has plenty of time and energy to take his butt to get another job or work overtime if necessary. It seems that if the situation has not gotten better, you have very different views and expectations. It has nothing to do with being a golddigger, but a man should be a man, especially if he wants your womanly goods. Tricks are for kids and dirty old men. Never trick a dude. You are too good for that!!!! Dudes only get away with what you let them get away with. Would you be paying for your best girlfriends way all the time when going out? He is supposed to be your friend right? Basically, your closest friend if he is sleeping with you. Girl...it is definitely time for you to put him in check.

Answer 5

ok the truth ur gonna ended up gettin tried of ur not gonna want 2b with sum1 who doesnt wrk cant seem 2 have money even on his birthday u might that u gonna stand by but if u were gonna u would be on yahoo and ask 4 advice on what 2 do so i am going 2 tell u that u r gonna tried of payin 4 him i know was with sum1 who was like that i got so tried of being his lillmoney maker it was 2 da piont were he ask me how much money i had in my pocket it got so annoyin that i left him i couldnt deal with a broke dude ur guy is sefish as long as u keep givin him money he aint gonna stop

Answer 6

No, you are not over-reacting. He needs to step it up in the relationship and help when it comes to the two of you going out and doing things. What is he spending his money on anyway? Frivolous things or necessary things? Either way, if you can't handle being his Sugar Mama, then get out. I personally would dump him if it were me.

Answer 7

i had a boyfriend like that he always said he has no money and i was paying for everything then i found out he did have money and he just didnt want to spend it when he can spend someone elses. i soon got rid of him and now i have a wonderful new boyfriend in which we have a equal realationship including spending money on each other and he loves buying me things

Answer 8

your not overreating that is just low and he needs to grow up get a job and be a man what your doing is wrong your making him take advantage of you he is so lazy and comfertable with you paying everything that he doesn't even care or try to get a job tell him that for now on your not paying for anything else your a lady and you should be treated like a lady.

Answer 9

I think you should dump him. You deserve better... Girls should be spoiled by there boyfriends... I know money isnt everything but he should want to treat u well.. take you out to eat buy you gifts... If he was the right guy he would... Good luck to ya :)

Answer 10

Is this guy's name Brandon? He sounds exactly like my ex. My advice is to stop paying for everything. You're not overreacting, and I bet he has money when it comes to buying something he wants. When you go out, pay for yourself only. He'll get the hint. If he doesn't, you may have to think about whether your affection for him is worth carrying a freeloader.

Answer 11

There is definitely something wrong with this picture here. It seems that he is just a cheapskate and wants you to do all the paying. I think I would dump him and find someone who is at least willing to go halfway.....