am I wrong?

Question

I have done tons and tons for this girl, loans, gifts, essentials 4 her and her family,and i guess i feel like she owes me,not really owe but she should do certain things for me like phone calls when she says stuff like that.I mean i get the feeling that she expects things from me w/o giving anything in return,am i wrong to be p8issed off.

or am i wrong to think that if u do so much 4 sum1 that they should bend over backwards to thank you 9and when i say alot i mean alot)

Answer 1

I think you are giving too much and getting resentful. Just take a step back and don't give more than you feel you can. It's okay to say no. If she dumps you for it, you are better off. But I don't think she will. I think this has built up over time and you are at your breaking point and she doesn't even know it.

If there is something you would like for her to do, ask her to do it. It's not her fault you feel you've over-extented. Just ask her to give and you continue to give, but only as much as you can.

Answer 2

hhmmnn... looks like the relationship is bound to flip over. by merely saying that 'she owes u' means you are'nt happy giving gifts freely. When you are really in love with the other person, we give gifts without expecting anything in return. Sure the petty things like she should have at least call you is not too much to ask but if you start to complain even on such little things, you are not happy anymore the way things are going on. Also communication is lacking. However, t'was good that you have recognized the problem & it is'nt too late to do something provided pluck up your courage & discuss this to her... don't let her pushed you to the edge & assumed things. of cors being pissed off is normal but to actually write at y'answers shows how pissed off you are. Act now,say something to her. Talking to each other how you feel will get you a better result.

Answer 3

I agree that you shouldn't be in a realtionship if you expect to get things out of it. If you feel unappreciated then maybe it's time to move on. If you feel like this now... it will only get worse as time goes on. Do you seriously see her changing her habbits in the future? Find a sweet girl that you can share your life with. A realationship is nurtured from both sides. (Not that she has to supply you monetarily, but being sweet and consderate goes a long way in showing appreciation.)

Girls... cover your ears... I'm going to get a little harsh--
ps.. when I was dating, I've paid off penty of Credit Card debts, and have also given plenty of stuff to my gf(s). You know when you've made the right decission to break it off when she has a new bf [that doesn't have the cash], so she gives you a call, still wants to be your friend, then sticks you with, "Honey, can I borrow some cash". -- My reply... "Sorry, it's not my job anymore" she usually doesn't call me anymore after that. Which is fine with me, becuase I don't believe in maintaining friendships with ex-girlfriends... it just unnecessarily complicates the relationship with the next gf.

Answer 4

When you give to somebody and there is no agreement to "pay-back," then technically it is just a gift. I do lots and lots for my boyfriend and spend lots and lots on him, sometimes he pays me back and sometimes not. Actually usually not. Sometimes it's hard not to feel used and that's exactly what we both feel like about now. I keep thinking to myself that if I keep giving and giving that he will really appreciate me and see what a good asset I am to him. Although he usually is't very appreciative. Some people out there are just users and will take and take without returning the favor. Your not wrong to be pissed off. I suggest that you set up some higher boundaries with her, expecially if she is starting to expect things from you. See if when you start cutting her off if she then stops having a relationship with you, then you will know for sure if she is using you. If she really cares she will call and want to see you without anything in return.

Answer 5

Yes, you are wrong. If these were gifts freely given with no thought of future reward, then she owes you nothing but gratitude. If, on the other hand, you gave her things to put her in your debt, you should have made this clear from the outset.

Answer 6

You shouldn't do things because you want something in return. If you want to be nice, u know don't expect anything back. BUT in your case, she should realize!!! Atleast pay half off??? Talk to her about it. It''s not right or wrong to get pissed it's an emotion resulting from your expectations.

Answer 7

yes and no.
You should not be pissed off...afterall she is a girl and sumtimes girls can act strange and get selfish (Sorry if this offends you, but its the truth, you have to admit it).

And No you are not wrong because we all feel duped and taken advantage of when our girls do this stuff to us. Let things go for a while. If you get so sick of the way she acts and treats you, then maybe its time to movie on.

Answer 8

"its wrong that you only gave those things to her, because you want something back" its not even love, if it were love you would have done those things cause simply it makes you happy to do so, so i guess this proves to me that i shouldnt be receiving gifts from men when i dont even feel the urge to give anything back and not even think that he intends something clean and serious for me.

one of the many reasons why women shouldnt accept bribes from men who only want them to get into bed with them./

Answer 9

No your not wrong.But did you make sure to tell her that you might expect something back from her?Maybe shes too blind to recognize and you should ask a favor of her.How could she refuse after you have done so much for her?

Answer 10

yes you are wrong, dont expect someone one to do for you
just because you have done so much for her,that not the way
'it work. if you want or expect her to return the favor then you
should have made it clear. but if you looking for something
then stop giving her things.