okay so im beginning to like this guy.. we text and e-mail a lot and were in the same class- and he flirts with me, for example he'll kick my desk, and gives any excuse to be near me. the only problem is, is that i have had 4 open heart surgeries in my life. 3 when i was young and one in 2003. i dont know how to tell him or how do i bring it up in a conversation? hes a really nice guy and im sure he'd just like me for who i am. but its important for him to know before we liking each other more, i dont want to mess things up in the future. how do i tell him???
2007-03-14 15:08:00 · 10 answers · asked by aminallover29 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
wow. i had mine five years ago. i have three scars. the leg. the left arm. and of course the zipper. usually they see the arm and ask about it. thats when i tell them. none have ever run away because of it. just work it into a casual conversation, dont make a big deal out of it. after you told him every thing is ok now. change the subject. if he has questions, let him ask. but they usually dont. so relax.
2007-03-14 15:16:55 · answer #1 · answered by zsaffireblue2003 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't see a problem here at all. For starters if there is something you are uncomfortable with you can wait until you think you are dating and think it might lead to a relationship then you can tell him. But having 4 heart surgeries, I can't think of a reason anyone would be put off by that and you should not be worried that anyone would. I can't believe anyone could be that shallow. You could use a little humor, if he asks you out you can say " Yes, but I've had 4 heart surgeries already so if you break my heart I'm going to kick your ***". I really can't believe anyone would be scared off by that. If a women told me that I would be intrigued and would want to know all about it.
Please don't make it a issue, it's not necessary, besides I'm sure you have other things to worry about....your still young.
2007-03-14 22:27:08 · answer #2 · answered by D'Artagnan 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey, Lucky you!! It is wonderful that the medical community has been able to help you. If I were you, I would just tell him that you have had to have some surgeries in the past. If he is interested, you can go into more details, if not, I would wait and see if he says anything later. Maybe you could tell him when something comes up about a sick friend, a parent who is ill, a death in someones family etc. Good luck and I hope your health continues to be goodâ¥â¥.
2007-03-14 22:15:24 · answer #3 · answered by kattsmeow 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He obviously likes you and it wouldnt matter to him at all. Get to know him a little more and tell him about it. He's a guy so he's going to be overprotective & probably look after you and find any reason to have you closer to him so he can look out for you. Use that in your favor, turn a con into a pro. Tell him you like him, tell him about the surgeries. Odds are you are more self conscious about it & he wouldnt mind at all.
2007-03-14 22:22:57 · answer #4 · answered by René 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why is it so important to tell him? right now it is part of your private life, and there is no need to tell something like this right from the start.
But if you really want to tell him, just tell him. the more you trust in yourself that it is not a problem at all, the more relaxed he will be. In any private conversation you might have you can just pop it out. If he really likes you for who your are, he will have appreciation for your situation. if he reacts in any other way, he is just not ready for any serious relationship with you.
2007-03-14 22:20:53 · answer #5 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't tell him. At this point it is none of his business. You are not dating, involved or anything else. If you want to keep something a secret, and obviously you do because he doesn't know, then you can tell no one.
2007-03-14 22:13:22 · answer #6 · answered by kny390 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just start talking about stuff like vital organs or something like that and just slowly start to talk about heart surgery and then just nonchalantly say, you have had some open heart surgeries.
2007-03-14 22:13:30 · answer #7 · answered by ari o 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are very lucky! Tell him, or let the info sneak out whenever you are ready.
His response will be the ultimate test of how sincere your emotions are!
2007-03-14 22:28:14 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
im a guy and it would be better to know then to freak out later
2007-03-14 22:24:33 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
actually i think that would be more appropriate to tell him when he is your boyfriend.
2007-03-14 22:12:27 · answer #10 · answered by Tiffany 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋