I am a 19 yr old female, and my on and off boyfriend of about 2 and a half years is 33. If the age difference isn't enough, we're also a long distance relationship (me-michigan, him-jersey). All of our friends know about us, and our ages, but neither of us have ever mentioned anything to our families. Lately we've been talking about our future as a couple, and where we want this to go. Lately I have been feeling like telling my family about him, but he doesn't think it's a good idea yet. I don't know if I should, just to get it out in the open. I think it might make things easier, when it comes to seeing each other, then we won't have to keep lying to our families.... Ugh... I don't know what to do...
2007-03-14 14:48:47 · 22 answers · asked by brooke3348 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
he says the reason he doesn't want us to make that step yet is because he doesn't want to do it too early and have one of our families not be so fond of one of us.... just a safety precaution on his part.
2007-03-14 14:57:07 · update #1
My wife and I met online and we've been married 12yrs she was from Indiana I'm from Georgia she moved here after we chatted online and on the phone for over a year. What you need to understand is that being in a long distance relationship can be very tough but until the time you decide to be together your relationship is personal and your own business but I wouldn't say anything right now until a time is set that the two of you are going to meet whether you going to jersey or him coming to Michigan. Also I'm 15yrs older then she is so I understand about mixed reviews. But I was taught you can't put a price or age on love. Our family and friends are cool with it and anyone else we don't care. ....Good Luck......
2007-03-14 15:06:06 · answer #1 · answered by miester44 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I hate to say this but if after this long and he does not wont to come out and tell your family's then you got to ask your self does he really wont to be with you or is he just using you for something?????????? if he wonted to be with you and wonted a future he would have wonted to come out by now what is he hiding. Does he not respect you enough or is he embarrass about it, if he was really into you and loved you it would not matter to him what anyone thought of it. I personally think you should move on I don't have anything wrong with dating people who are older, but I do know from experience that in some ways age does matter, like kids he may think he is to old, or may already have them??? interest and things activities that you like to do, your younger and have more energy to do active stuff will he in 8 years from now, I think at this point you guys are at total different parts of your lives your just starting to live he already has
2007-03-14 15:03:22 · answer #2 · answered by jenn c 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
there is nothing wrong with going out with a younger guy but you have a couple of strikes against you already. he is 14 yrs older than you and if i was your dad i would not like you going out with someone that old. Not that what your dad really matters b/c you are going to do what you want. Telling your parents is a bold move. Is he worth opening up a can of worms? I mean try telling your parents that you have been going out with a 31 yr old guy since you were 17? that here is called robbing the cradle or statutory rape.
2007-03-14 14:58:38 · answer #3 · answered by chazzz 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, do what you think is right. Second, if you can't think of anything then I'll give you some of my advice. Ok, my grandparents both had very wide spread ages. on my dad's side and on my mom's they divorced years later with two children each making life hard as heck. Now, If you don't like lying then tell your parents not harm will have been done and you can walk away knowing that you told the truth even if they don't like it. Yes, the truth hurts but its worth it...trust me.
2007-03-14 14:55:01 · answer #4 · answered by Lefty 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I dated a pair of older adult men a minimum of 10 years older than I. some have been rather super, others have been terrible with regard to the comparable as adult men i've got dated around my age. I don' think of the relationship's final with the aid of version in questioning, i think of older adult men like the reality they are in a position to nevertheless entice older females, yet older females are greater what they choose because of the fact they are in a position to narrate greater useful. Older females who date youthful adult men, those relationships do nicely because of the fact females regulate greater useful to diverse circumstances. (as long as they don't attempt to be a "mom") purely my opinion right here, yet this became into an extremely good question. Take care.
2016-12-18 13:56:45 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that he might not want to bring it up with your family yet, is because all good things need a slow introduction...im sure he cares alot about you and doesnt want to freak out your family, with the age difference... he wants to preserve what you both have, and go about this slowly... i would take it slow too, whats the rush?
2007-03-14 15:06:36 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't want you to be taken advantage of by this older man. But sometimes because of our age we can be very vulnerable. Is the relationship really serious or is he taking you for a joy ride? It is really suspicious him wanting to keep this from family members. Girl, what you have to understand is that when we are considered to be the ONE a man will not hide it! Not from his family, and his friends. If he is really serious he will want the whole world to know.
2007-03-14 14:59:26 · answer #7 · answered by stepintostep 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am 40 and my girlfriend is only 19, We have been dating for a few months now. I have met her mom, her mom's boyfriend, and her little sister. They like me and do not have a problem with us seeing each other. Infact her mother thinks I am a great guy and thinks we make a great couple too.
My advice is to talk to your parents about the age thing.
2007-03-14 14:58:09 · answer #8 · answered by droopydog88 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
the fact that he doesn't want to tell the families indicates that he's not ready for a relationship. you have a choice: continue your 'on again off again keep it from the parents charade' with this 33 year old baby, or go out and find a real man who wants to shout his love for you from the mountain tops. age has nothing to do with it, honey.
2007-03-14 14:53:04 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Let me give my honest opinion on this scenerio. I dont think this is a very good idea to be dating him. You are barely out of high school and he has been out of college for over ten years. And the long distance thing is kind of iffy. I doubt your family will be too impressed.
2007-03-14 14:53:01 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋