Have you had anyone say something as asinine as "there are no contradictions in the bible"?

Question

Because that one always makes me laugh out loud. Not only are there MANY blatant contradictions, there are so many it's hard to know where to start.
Here are just a few to start with;
PSA 145:9 The LORD is good to all: and his tender mercies are over all his works.

JER 13:14 And I will dash them one against another, even the fathers and the sons together, saith the LORD: I will not pity, nor spare, nor have mercy, but destroy them.

Here is another;
MAT 1:16 And Jacob begat Joseph the husband of Mary, of whom was born Jesus, who is called Christ.

LUK 3:23 And Jesus himself began to be about thirty years of age, being (as was supposed) the son of Joseph, which was the son of Heli.

Can't even get Jesus's grandfather right. How sad is that from a "divinely inspired book"?

continued...

And one of my personal favorites;

Matt.27:46,50: "And about the ninth hour Jesus cried with a loud voice, saying, "Eli, eli, lama sabachthani?" that is to say, "My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me?" ...Jesus, when he cried again with a loud voice, yielded up the ghost."

Luke23:46: "And when Jesus had cried with a loud voice, he said, "Father, unto thy hands I commend my spirit:" and having said thus, he gave up the ghost."

John19:30: "When Jesus therefore had received the vinegar, he said, "It is finished:" and he bowed his head, and gave up the ghost."

Three "witnesses" and three completely different accounts.
So, for those of you stupid enough to say (let alone believe) that there are no contradictions in this book of bronze-age jewish mythology, I say HA!
And these are just the tip of the iceberg.
Oh and do NOT come here and try and say that they were taken out of context. They weren't, and you know it.

Heaven's,
Your "PHD" must be just like Ken Hovind's, bought and paid for from a diploma mill...

Servant,
Let's actually READ it this time shall we?
MAT 1:16 And Jacob begat Joseph the husband of Mary, of whom was born Jesus, who is called Christ.

LUK 3:23 And Jesus himself began to be about thirty years of age, being (as was supposed) the son of Joseph, which was the son of Heli.

Well, well, we have NO mention of Mary's parentage now do we?
BOTH are talking about Joseph's father aren't they?
Tell me, do you have as much trouble with basic comprehension as you do reading?

RB,
That has to be, without a doubt, the LAMEST reply I've ever gotten.
But I want to thank you, I have something to post on www.fstdt.com (fundies say the darndest things .com)
So, thanks!

Lee,
Have any proof?
Yeah, I did'nt think so either...

Answer 1

EvilBible.com lists 146 of them

Guess they were ALL just "taken out of context", huh?

.

Answer 2

I agree that there are contradictions. Even contradictions theologically... (just look at the use of the doctrine of immediate reward and retribution in Chronicles, and the lack there-of in Ecclesiastes).

but one should ask: what difference does this make? As the bible was written by people in their quest for God, it is unavoidable that you are going to see them say different things at different times... the community's experience changes through the centuries.

why should a persons faith be hinged upon whether the bible was written by god or by People? as a book written by God, we would have to posit a God that has some sort of multiple personality disorder, as a book written by people, we see their very real struggle with faith and God through the millenia. why should it be any different for us?

as a devout christian, I urge you not to give up on faith simply because it has a very strange book at its centre!!! It also tends to have a lot of very strange people too!!! The important thing is to be a part of an intentional spiritual community as you experience the infinite.

Answer 3

O.K. YO----DUH, Personally brother you are offensive; but this is the least of your problems. I simply want to say this,
Even if you do not believe, Jesus Christ still Died for your Sins. Why? Cause God loves you inspite of yourself. Jesus Loves you, And as a Christian, Although I despise your thinking, I must Forgive and Love you as a Person as well.Why? Because God, The same God who created ME Created you as well, AND GOD LOVES YOU. Now, I can personnally tell you that there is NO SUCH THING AS AN ATHIEST!! For ALL KNOW HIM, YOU just refuse to believe.
There is no middle ground, a Self Proclaimed Athiest is a Person who walks the Earth Blind and Confused and has no basis in which to live life, because they do not believe one way or another; they think they are like the cows in a feild just
walking along chewing their cud. But even an animal such as this acknowledges their creator. I believe you to be an inteligent individual, so why not look for the answers instead of slamming the one true question.

Answer 4

Since you won't accept criticism, then it won't do much good to answer. But did Luke actually witness it? Did he state that? You might consider that these books were written for different audiences, that would have considered different things important, So the gospels weren't word for word with each other, but just some of what Jesus said on the cross. So all three are correct. Can you also refute the resurrection?

Answer 5

First, though I know that OUT OF CONTEXT is used as a MAJOR cop out to not deal with real issues, many of the supposed "contradictions" are in fact taken out of context. For example the skeptics annotated bibles does an excellent job of taking scriptures out of context. In fact I would argue around a 75-90% of their supposed contradictions are out of context. (that website is very interesting, I have spent a lot of time there, probably one of the few christians that have)

However, there are a few instances where the Bibles does contradict itself on certain facts.

But Note, and know one has challenged this to date on Y!A, and I have said this a lot.

The Bible NEVER contradicts itself THEOLOGICALLY.

***UPDATE***
People like to give me a thumbs down when I say the Bible NEVER contradicts itself THEOLOGICALLY. Yet, no one has ever rebutted this statement via email or even an edit to their question/answer. Hmmmmm....please, if your are going to give me a thumbs down at least have the decency to EMAIL me and let me know why. I take this issue very seriously.

Answer 6

maybe instead of trying to take the Bible apart you should try to learn how to read it - I'll answer just one of those and let you figure out the rest b/c I'm sure you wont have an open mind to accept the answers anyway
Jesus's grandfather - one was the line from Mary the other from Joseph
see how easy that was to explain

Answer 7

If you want to find an error you will make up one yourself. You're simply not understanding because you don't want to understand. Just like what the Bible itself says.

Isaiah 6:9-10
9 He said, "Go and tell this people:
" 'Be ever hearing, but never understanding;
be ever seeing, but never perceiving.'
10 Make the heart of this people calloused;
make their ears dull
and close their eyes. [a]
Otherwise they might see with their eyes,
hear with their ears,
understand with their hearts,
and turn and be healed."

Answer 8

The Bible, and the Q'uran. etc. No contradictions, they say. Gimme a break! But you as well, gimme a break! Can't you give a book the right to be wired that way it is? The Bible is not a Western text, therefore it follows a different set of logical principles.
Gimme a break!

Answer 9

Do you know what a contradiction is?

First, something has to state "A"

Then it has to state, in the same context, "Not A".

A Contradition is NOT A then B, it is A then NOT A.



There are no valid "contradictions" in the Bible.

Answer 10

I'll tell you what's even more asinine, when someone confuses misunderstanding with contradiction. Now that is asinine! By the way, the word asinine should never be used as it was in your question. Just a little note.

Answer 11

Well, someone yesterday asked 'If evolution is true, why can't plants swim?'. I don't think I'll ever encounter anything as asinine as that.

But yes, the idea that there are no contradictions in the bible is just whack.