am i a bad person?

Question

im 14 my mom really ill at the moment and i give her **** when im really stressed even though i don't mean it and i tell her i hate her and say stuff like i hope you die but i feel really bad as shes really ill today i told her that i hated her and wished she was dead but i was stressed i didn't mean it and this makes her really upset does this make me a bad person?i said sorry but shes not speaking to me at the moment

Answer 1

you are a typical teenager, at least you are asking for help so you have noticed that you have done wrong...my son i ADHD and is always saying horrible things to me ,it breaks my heart... why dont you offer to do something for her,ask her if she needs anything from the shops, or write her a letter and leave it by her bedside with a cuppa.. at least then you can express your feelings without getting into another argument..tell her how much you love her and how sorry you are and try and explain why you say them things,there is nothing stronger then a mothers love,its hard to understand unless you are a mum yourself... good luck

Answer 2

Hey I dont think it sounds like your a bad person. I think you may get stressed due to the fact that your mum is ill and maybe this is getting you down and in turn you take your frustration out on her. At 14 I used to get angry all the time and say much the same things to my mum. You may have hurt her for the moment but she will forgive you soon enough as mums never stay cross for long!!!Just make a big effort to not shout and if you feel your self getting stressed take some time out and go for a walk or something where you can go and scream at the top of your voice (makes things feel much better!!!) and when your chilled go and talk to your mum and try and explain why you get stressed and that you feel bad when you say those things to her because I'm sure she knows that already!

Answer 3

Hi. You're at a difficult age right now... probably going through alot of changes and challenges in your life and you really dont know how to deal with them. And, maybe the one person you want to talk to about it isnt well herself. So, here's a suggestion. Take a moment, if you can and think about all the things that is p***ing you off right now. You could write it down or put it on our pc. Then find a good moment and take a cup of tea to mum or make her lunch if you can and tell her you have stuff that you need help with and a good chat with her might help you understand whats going on and work through it. Mum loves you and obviously cant argue back with you cos she isnt well... but if you show her respect, she will show you the same in return and am sure will be prepared to work things through with you and help you. Thats what mums are for. Openness is very important and to be able to communicate with each other would help make your relationship with each other stronger and more respectful. I'm a parent of 2 grown kids. My son is 18. I have a relationship where we talk about absolute everything. If we're not happy we thrash it out and the air then becomes clear. There is nothing worse than a bad atmosphere. So as part of you maturing, try this. Good Luck!!

Answer 4

I can remember going through this horrible stage, you are not a child and not an adult and it feels like the world is against you, my dad died when I was a teenager and I was really horrible to my mum, I have no idea why I took it out on her, you always seem to hurt the ones closest to you. Do you have anyone you can talk to, it will really help just to get whatever is frustrating you off your chest, even through your mum is ill im sure she will understand its a difficult time for you too. If you cant talk to her just now try writing her a letter and explain you really didn't mean to hurt her feelings, she will really appreciate it and maybe you can get back to being the caring daughter she needs.

Answer 5

Just give it a bit of time. But is no good saying sorry and then keep on doing the same thing all the time. Try and see if the school can provide you with somekind of "Anger Management". This might help you to control your moods a bit better. Its hard being a teenager but even harder trying to be a parent to one. Your not a bad person its just your behaviour thats bad. Hang on in there. Its get easier after then next 5 years or so.

Answer 6

You're 14. That's why you say stuff like that. I love my mum and she's the best person ever but when I was younger I used to get well stressed with her and tell her I wished she was dead etc. It's hormones etc and all part of growing up. You'll come to love here again soon!

Answer 7

Just a thought, are you angry and stressed because you are worried your mom could die( I just don't know how sick she is).In this case it might be normal to be angry.However if your mother is really sick you need to try help her not give her more stress.She is probably worried about your daily lives and is thinking of all the things she can't do right now.You need to think about how she is feeling right now.How do you think your mom feels? you hurt her terribly when you wished she were dead.How would you feel if she is more sick than you thought? Try to do your best each day and help your mom.You are 14 not 4, you need to think before you talk.Try think of her needs first and show her you love her.

Answer 8

ok slow down stop thinking ur the bad person start thinking y u r stressed and try and resolve it you need to realise that mum is not the problem and she needs you right now i know at 14 its difficult im not much older my sel but let me know what it is your stressed about and i wil b happy to talk to you if you dont mind me asking what is wrong with your mum

Answer 9

You have not done anything wrong,tell her you are very sorry and how important she is to you, you know sometimes it happens to children,not all at this stage of puberty to behave like you do but they do need someone to talk to so since your mum is ill she do not have the courage to do that but i think inside her heart she loves you vey much,is just that you hurt her but she will be fine and she is still angry to herself that she is sick.

Answer 10

no you are not bad, you are a teenager and the anger you feel towards your mom is normal its called rebelling, however you say that your mom is ill so maybe you need to think before you speak and count to ten when you feel anger boiling, remember we only get one mom and you must learn to treat her with the respect that she deserves, talk to her and tell her how you feel, what triggers your outbursts, moms know best and she will have been there herself when she was your age,good luck