How to inform my parents about a change in religion?

Question

My parents are very religiously-centered people, and up until recently I agreed with them. Long story short, I no longer agree with their religious beliefs, but I'm unsure how to tell them this. They will definately be opposed to it and may try and force me to go to a church I don't agree with (specific religion is irrelevant). Any ideas?

Answer 1

You kinda have to, at least, respect their point of view as long as you live off of them. You already know that they aren't going to approve. If you live with them, it will only create big, bad problems as they will be entised to cram their faith down your throat. If you do live on your own, why should they know? Politics, spirituality, and sex are things that don't always go well in families. You already know they wouldn't approve. If it was a guy they wouldn't approve of, or a political ideology they wouldn't approve of, they might be less crazy. But, since they are 'very religiously centered' people, I'd just keep a tight lid on it as long as you can. Why do they need to know? If you live away from them, 'tell them' by wearing suggestive, by not outright, jewlery/clothes/books n stuff. They might notice, but not say anything. They would know. If you backed them into a corner and waved it in their face, well, anyone could get defensive about dearly held beliefs. You have to have the grace they lack. You have to tolerate and attempt to respect their views enough not to shock them into next Wensday. They are family, you know. Be gentle. I understand you want to be open, but you don't want them to hate you. People whose family hates them really do have a burden to carry.

Answer 2

I went through a similar situation I left my parents church when I was 18 because although a good church in some ways was not meeting my spiritual needs. I was not allowed to change churches until I was 18 but was allowed to go to a Christ centered Bible Study. I obeyed my mom and today she says that leaving the church was a good thing because it made me stronger. Pray about the change and be certain it is in Gods will. God bless.

Answer 3

Do you live in the same house with them? If not then you should just tell them! And whether you do or don't act like it doesn't bother you that you are of a different faith, perhaps buy them a book on it or something, let them discover it for themselves. When you talk about with them have a civil conversation, but before you tell them make sure you really want to change, don't go back and forth on religions making a big deal out of it each time. It might be hurtful to them but hopefully they will get over it. If somethings start happening like abuse just fold and accept their faith, it won't hurt to humor them, you should probably call social services though.

Answer 4

If they believe in forcing someone they evidently believe in hypocrisy. There are a lot of people who realize the absurdity of hearing terms like Christian baby or Muslim baby, babies don't choose. Not that your of such a very young age. I would guess that your parents wouldn't feel you have to be older to be choosing Christianity. So why would they feel you need to be older to choose anything else. No choice isn't religion it is forced slavery of the mind. And that is faith without belief.

Answer 5

First of all I am not a Christian...But as far the religious beliefs go I think you should ask them what they think about the beliefs that they are following...and if you truly dont believe in them all you need to do is debate them and prove that their point is wrong and prove your self right and make them think of the reasons that their beliefs might be wrong...

Answer 6

I have talked with many people in your situation. It seems to go best this way: talk to them seperately. Take your mom out to lunch somewhere semi quiet so the two of you can have a heart to heart. Let her know ahead of time that you have something serious to discuss- that you are not in trouble, but you need to share with her what is going on inside of your head, and in your life.
Be patient, dont be defensive or talk in an angry voice if she begins to give you trouble.
Tell her that you would like to talk with your father in the same way- alone and in confidence. That same day, talk with your father alone (if you can)
If its not possible to get him alone- then break the news to him in the company of your mother.
It seems to work out better if the two parents are not together when they first hear the news. One on one is better, that way you dont feel like someone is teaming up on you, and they have time to look inside their own head without distraction or influence of the other.
Good luck.

Answer 7

they can only force you to attend, they can't force you to believe, and they can only do that until you turn 18. if they insist you go, then honor their wishes and attend keeping in mind that you're doing it for your parents' sake. I don't know how old you are, but a few years of attending a church really isn't that long over the course of a lifetime.

Answer 8

My husband was a Protestant before he became Catholic so I understand your feelings. Maybe you should ask a friend of your parents who shares your belief to help you break the news.