dating my boyfriend for 17 months. we live 150 miles from eachother, and mainly only spend weekends together. he is expecting to leave a lucrative job, and his home to move in with me. i feel that we truly love eachother, but i have some issues. on one occasion, during an arguement, i tried to walk out of the room when he grabbed me by the arm, and threw me to the floor. i had 2 badly bruised knees, bruised elbow, and 4 "finger bruises" from where he grabbed me. i was in shock and very scared. although we had an intense conv. immed. afterward. i still cannot forget about this. the other behavior i worry about is a clingy ex girlfriend that he still communicates with despite my concerns. i have only asked him if i could meet her, and still after 10 months, she is still a big secret. how can i resolve these issues and have the respect and trust i need and give. i am an attractive woman with countless dating opportunities. but am completely committed and devoted to this one person.
2007-03-14 13:35:50 · 4 answers · asked by chewylvr3 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Dump him. He has baggage, issues, and violent tendencies.
Next, there's probably two or three women with babies for him out there somewhere . . .
Let him keep his lucrative job 150 miles away, and find someone nice with a lucrative job in your same town.
Your devotion is unappreciated and unrewarded, dear.
2007-03-14 13:41:10 · answer #1 · answered by nora22000 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Get out of this "relationship" now, before he moves in with you.
If he is secretive about a supposed "ex" girlfriend, she is most likely not an ex at all and he is just telling you that.
He does not truly love you, he is being physically abusive to you. Anyone who grabs another person and throws them to the floor should not be trusted.
You will only end up being abused verbally and mentally and especially physically if you allow him to move in with you.
He will be throwing it up in your face that he sacrificed so much and gave up his home and lucrative job to be with you, no good can come of this.
End this relationship now before you end up getting seriously hurt or even killed by this abuser.
2007-03-14 14:02:52 · answer #2 · answered by Sue F 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is a very bad sign
However ts very hard to believe this involves a single incidence of violence, and even it it does, there are probably other issues with this man
10 to 1 this guy ratchets up the "chemistry" thing for you big time
Cheating, lying, controlling behavior, and violence, (preferably restrained to some degree) in males -were key evolutionary genetic survival traits - and most chicks DNA have built-in chemistry for such males
However, don't believe you can just wish away this evolutionary baggage, it's all subconscious anyways and if you drop him odds are very high you end up with a similar male
The monogamous, noncontrolling, honest, and non abusive nice guy who treats you with respect - will bore you to death and in evolutionary terms such non-seed spreaders in fact were evolutionary dead ends - and your genes recognize this
You probably just need the least worst jerk you can find - for example a controlling abuser who is not physically violent against you or others - a guy that will rachet up your chemistry but not put you at personal risk
2007-03-14 13:59:41 · answer #3 · answered by JET99 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
i would try and find a way to see if he is cheating wicth sounds like a good bet. and as far as him grabing you and throwing you that is a real bad sain and if i was a woman and some one did that to me i would be out of there.
2007-03-14 13:46:00 · answer #4 · answered by jesse m 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋