Is sex something special?

Question

i am 14 years old. i am a virgin. all my friends aren,t so im kinda pressured to have sex. i am a freak and a very horny young man. so if i think with my dick i would have sex everytime i got the opportunity. but im thinking with my head. and i have been told that sex is something special that should only be shared with someone special. i have also been told i am too young for sex. if sex is something special, how come men all over the world go to clubs with the intention of meeting a girl, taking her home and having sex with her than never see her again? im also worried that in the middle of the sex i will have to stop and say to my partner i am sorry i can,t continue i don,t know what im doing. so any advice? should i wait until im grown, or is it ok to do it now? and if so should i only do it with someone special or any girl i know who is willing?

Answer 1

Sex is a special thing, meant between a husband and wife. With sex comes a lifetime commitment to each other, to live, to love, laugh and share, through the good bad and ugly. Sure being a teenager is hard and you may feel pressured to have sex, but it is all part of growing up. My advice is wait until you are married. Not only will you have to worry about an unwanted baby, you wont have to deal with the emotional baggage attached.

Answer 2

I'm a 27 year old woman who has some advice for you. Sex is very important and should be saved for someone special. Think of if this way, if you went out and just had sex just for the experience and the girl got pregnant, condom or not, what would you do? You are 14, I didn't lose my virginity until I was 16 and I regret that I even did then. It was my high school boyfriend and we were together for awhile and it just seemed like time. I wish I had been a virgin when I met my soon to be husband. What matters is not "getting off" or the peer pressure, but whether you truely love the person you're with. I realize kids now (you're a kid to me, 13 years difference) have alot of pressure and it is hard to ignore, but you're a kid, be a kid, don't put yourself in a situation that you honestly aren't ready for yet. Not to mention STDs and other stuff. Just be strong and don't give in to the pressure. When you really love someone and want to share and experience love in that way you'll know. Believe it or not sex is not all about just getting your rocks off.

Answer 3

Never worry what people around you are doing. As long as you know in your heart that you're doing what's better for you in the long run. You are not a freak. All young men and many women are extrememly horny. I think you're wonderful for thinking with your head!! You're way ahead of your friends. The reason why adults tell you you're too young for sex, is because many times, they have done something in their past that they regret. Maybe they got an STD, a disease from sex. Aids is huge. People getting attached and hurt when they dont realize that its just sex and not a relationship. Young people are very horny, and haven't gone through enough of life to realize what they may want when they're more mature, around their late teens. That's why so many older people REGRET having sex too young. Make sure you really like the girl. Make sure both of you understand what the sex means. Is it only sex, or are you looking to be her boyfriend. If you just want sex, then lay that all out before hand. Trust me, plenty of girls don't mind. But many others get confused and hurt when the man's intentions aren't explained. The reason why people say sex is special is because it is. While in movies, its just all in good fun..and even young adults, they just want to have sex...sex is always so much better with someone you really are head over heels over. If you don't know anyone like that, maybe you shouldn't have sex because it wont be really all that worth it anyway. Watch some porn!

Answer 4

I'm a 15 year old Christian evangelist, be prepared.
God made men this way, it's not unorthodox to have feelings like that. Just being the fact that sex is something special and it should be saved for marriage, because then you know it is the supposedly right one and the special one. That's how God intended life. Not just to go around promiscuously and getting girls pregnant here and there.
14 is really not a good age to have sex. Coming from a girl, and a Christian, you really should wait until 25 or something like that.
Being pressured in society is nothing special. I go to a all girls school and it's "no longer cool to be a virgin". I know what it's like to be pressured like that. It's even more pressure when an evangelist comes into the school (aka me).
Anyways, kid, we live in the day and age of where cyber sex and masturbation and real sex is cool to have at our age. The fact of the matter is you can get STD's faster at such a young age. Do you want to have STD's or just wait to have sex? I thought so.
God made man and woman to have sex when they get married. Just remember that.

Answer 5

Well, I'm 18 and a virgin and I know how you feel. You shouldn't have sex just because everyone is is 'saying' they are. Some ppl lie just to seem cool to others. At any rate I think you should wait until you meet that special someone. The first time you try will be real embarrassing anyway. Me and my boyfriend tried one time and it was so embarrassing because I didn't know what the hell I was doing! Luckily me and the dude were really close friends. We laugh about it now! We haven't and won't try again until marriage. Just wait until you are ready. You do not want to get an STD or worse get a girl pregnant. Just wait!

Answer 6

Sex is both something that can happen just because someone wants it to happen, and it is also 'something very special' that should be kept 'just between the two of them for the rest of their lives' ... and you are considered to be 'too young' for sex because you can't know all of the reasons why both answers are 'true' at the same time at your age, and you need time to 'mature' in your outlook before you decide whether to do one, the other, or 'both' in your life. Sex is a matter of 'choice' and also of 'opportunity' ... and I'm going to tell you the same thing I said to my sons when they were your age. Make 'best friends' with your hand. That can 'take care of the urges' you are feeling right now ... you're going through the last stages of puberty, and those 'feelings' are all of the new 'hormones' running rampant through your system. Your hand isn't going to care whether you 'stop' or 'continue' and it's not going to 'tell tales on you' either. Also, even if you decide not to have sex until you are 'older and wiser' and maybe with that 'one true love of your life' ... please be sure that you NEVER walk out your door without carrying a condom. Don't just 'slip' one into your wallet and 'forget it's there' because heat and time will 'age it' and it won't work if it is too old ... so buy yourself a 'large box' of them and put a new one into your wallet every Friday before you go 'out' ... because you never can tell 'when' you won't be able to 'resist' your urges, and you should ALWAYS WEAR A CONDOM with any 'young woman' until you KNOW that she's your 'one and only' and that you and she are both 'fully healthy and clean' and are going to spend the rest of your lives together. THEN and only then should you 'not' wear a condom ... and I think that for most boys, they should be at least 18 years old (legally an adult) and so should the girl ... but I know that 'things happen' and that you need to be 'prepared' just in case something does.

Answer 7

You are not a freak, it's very normal for a 14 year old boy to be thinking of sex all the time.

Don't let them pressure you, but just find someone you want to be with. It's scary the first time and you will be very nervous, don't worry you will be fine. No one knows how to do it well at first, but practice will make you better.

Don't think it's special or it will just put too much pressure on you. Fact is it's can just be sex if you want. Pressure and performance don't mix well in men when it comes to sex. Fact is for most men it is just sex...keep repeating that to yourself.

Answer 8

You want it straight? It is what you make it. If you have sex just to have sex, it's pretty much just as special as shaking someone's hand. Seriously, it's NOTHING special.
Unless you find someone you truly love. Then, it's pretty amazing because you want to have sex for them- and they want it for you, and so you're both working for eachother, and it's really kind and unselfish. Etc. Listen though- 14 is a fine age, I didn't lose my virginity until I was 17. It's no big deal, honestly. You probably think I don't understand, but, well, I wasn't 17 that long ago.
Also, don't worry. A) Just as many girls go to clubs to hook up with guys and have sex as guys do, and
B) Not all guys are like that. Case in point: Me. And lots of others. So, don't fret- your whole life is ahead of you. You'll experience it soon enough, but it should be what YOU want it to be. Don't worry man, when it happens, you should be wicked comfortable. If you have any doubt, just be like, meh- not now. For me, it was SO like, simple and easy, and turned out really nice. So, honestly, just lay low.
Also, the majority of your friends are lying. It's a fact, not a guess.

Answer 9

Sex is, like other things in life, what you make of it. It has the potential to be something very very special. It is an expression of intimacy. Being intimate is sharing with someone your most personal inner self. It doesn't have to be that way, it can be just about getting the pleasure and excitement of it. But there is no comparison of "casual" sex to "real" sex. It is up to you how you want to experience it. There is nothing wrong with you. You sound like a normal young man. In fact I think it is admirable that you can ask this question and that you want to be responsible about it, and this is why it will probably be more special for you, and you will probably have a better experience with it than your friends have. And you will probably find better girls and relationships in the long run with that kind of attitude. Wait until you feel ready and find someone to share with, because then you won't have to worry about what to do and you won't feel guilty afterward. Even girls who are willing now can feel used if you just have sex for the sake of sex. They may act like they don't care, but how they are treated by you is important to them, and imortant to how you will feel about yourself.

Answer 10

First off...I seriously doubt all of your friends are having sex. At your age it's all about boasting...I'm in college and still have really normal/non nerdy guy friends who haven't had sex.

In my opinion sex is special, at least make it special your first time. You don't want to be old and look back at your first time and regret the fact that you just had a random hookup with some girl you didn't even know & who meant nothing to you.

And yes, I also think you should wait a little while. You have no idea of the emotions and consequences that go into having sex. Condoms/birth control aren't fool proof. Are you really ready to be a daddy?

Answer 11

Its supposed to be special. You sound like a very sweet young man and very responsible. I was 15 when i first had sex but i had been with my boyfriend for 2 years and i felt like i was ready. were still together and very happy. But DONT feel pressured to do it just because your friends are. Since they arent being responsible like you they could end up with an STD or pregnant or anything. When you meet the right person who you want to share that special moment with youll know and it will be great. Men who pick up girls in bars and clubs just want to use the women they meet because they are thinking with their *****. Just make sure if you do decide to do it youre ready and wont regret it AT ALL. And be safe. good luck and keep using your head. E-mail me if you want to ok.
good luck