My fiance gets mad at my son when he goes potty in his diaper. He sends him to the corner and yells at him. I told him that potty training should be a fun time for him (you know to feel like a big boy). That we should never yell when he doesn't remember to make it to the potty. We should praise and encourage him and never be mean about it. Won't the potty training take longer if my fiance continues to act like an immature father figure???
2007-03-14 11:58:38 · 30 answers · asked by Lana Marie 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
"Mee-Maw" Yes, I do confront my fiance. I tell him to leave him alone and that what he is doing is wrong. I will usually take it from there. But my fiance acts all hateful towards me after and thinks I am not Mothering right.....he thinks I am not doing enough. But that is not how I chose to handle certain situations by yelling! By the way.....my Son calls his Grandma "mema" which I believe is the same way your yahoo ID is pronounced.
2007-03-14 12:25:21 · update #1
Why the HELL are you still with this grown boy child?
Your son should be more important to you than an as+++++. If you chose to stay with someone who is abusing your child the least you could do is tell him to leave your child alone.
Yes, yelling and punishing a young child while trying to potty train him is abuse!!! This is a learning experience. NOT BOOT CAMP!! I take it your son is not 15 yrs old, that he is still a little fellow. Your son will be terrified of accidents as well as going to the potty because of this arrogant b++++++. He won't know what is going on.
Come on MOM! Put this baby first, not some hotheaded p++++.
SHAME ON YOU!! for letting this happen.
God, I get mad when parents think it is OK for someone to mentally, verbally or physically abuse a child!!! Poor baby!!
How do you feel Mom, when this pr+++ is verbally abusing you? And you are an adult!!
2007-03-14 12:15:34 · answer #1 · answered by Mee-Maw 5 · 3⤊ 2⤋
The best way to potty train boys is to get strickers and other rewards, jump up and down, clap and get excited for the child when they do go. Get rid of the diapers and let the child pick out some big boy undies (use pull ups for nighttime until they start to stay dry at night). What your fiance is doing will make your son not want to use the restroom at all. You have the right idea.
2007-03-14 19:09:24 · answer #2 · answered by Blondi 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hmmmm,
Your fiance is totally out of line! He is going to do more harm than good. You have to let him know that he is traumatizing your child! Yelling at him will only back fire. How old is he? Does your son show the signs of being ready to potty train? i.e. telling you he has to potty, pulling at himself, not pottying in his diaper for atleast 2 hours at a time? If not, he probably wont get it until he is ready, no matter how hard you try. If he does show those signs , then simply taking him to the potty often will help him to understand the basic concept. Try going to the site below- maybe if your fiance reads this, he will understand the affects of what he is doing to your child. Wish you the best!
mamaofthesweet4
2007-03-14 19:14:55 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
You're right, yelling and punishment should NOT be a part of potty training. Using a diaper has been your son's only way of "going" for so long and now he has a whole new method to learn, that's hard! If your fiance won't lay off, tell him you'll be in charge of the diapers and potty training from now on. Children should NEVER be punished for their natural body functions.
2007-03-14 19:03:34 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Pull a Dr. Phil and ask your fiance "How's the yelling working for ya?" It isn't, so a different approach needs to be taken. No offense, but he is bullying your son. How would he like someone yelling at him every time he screwed up? You have it figured out. Good for you Mom!
Try to encourage the dad to take him to the potty like "big boys" do. It is easier to learn from a man...so I've been told.
2007-03-14 19:40:15 · answer #5 · answered by Silver B 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Wow - your child will NEVER be able to potty train if this behavior continues. Yelling actually hinders this particular development as well as others. If you were learning to drive and everytime you get behind the wheel and someone shouted at you and sent you to your room for the slightest mistake you would more than likely never want to learn how to drive. Acccidents happen, I cannot belive your fiance is doing this. First you need to decide if your son is even ready to potty train - usually about the 27 month is actually an average time for boys. You MUST encourage him when he does go to the toilet but NEVER NEVER yell at him for failing to do so. It is more of you and your fiance's fault your child is not telling you he needs to go to the restroom, or your fiance's lack of attention to the child's needs. I do not mean to sounds harsh but my goodness, it is an incredibly harsh thing your fiance is doing to your child.
2007-03-14 19:06:04 · answer #6 · answered by AnswerGirl 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think you have a larger issue than potty training your son here. You sound as if you have a real communication problem with the man that you plan to marry and spend the rest of your life with. He also seems to have issues with anger towards your son, jealousy maybe? Take a long hard look at how he treats your son, and how he treats you when he doesn’t like the way you "mother". Ask yourself; if your sister was involved with someone who acted this way toward her and her child would you really want her to marry him - honestly? When you were young if your mother were dating a man that talked to you like that as a child - would you want Mommy to marry him?
That is more of an issue than is yelling at your son a good way to potty train - that one is answered in its asking - because you even know it's not.
Good luck to you and your son - and your "future husband" ?
2007-03-18 14:51:52 · answer #7 · answered by Mum of 6 - newest born 8-25-07 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is my opinion that this is a bad way to potty train. By yelling at him you are making him feel ashamed, and he may feel scared to even attempt using the toilet. You are right the positive reinforcement is the best way to go. Yelling at a child when he can't control his functions yet is well wrong. Potty Training takes time and patients don't be to hard on the little guy.
2007-03-14 19:04:25 · answer #8 · answered by Melanie N 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well being agressive with your child is never a way to potty train him one of the best ways to do this is to let him run around without a diaper on. Most of the time they will not use the bathroom on the floor
2007-03-14 19:03:01 · answer #9 · answered by xgangstashawtyx 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
yes, this will terrify and frighten the child which can cause they boy to wet himself when he is scared for years.
potty training should always be about fun, encouragement and praise.
now there is a fine line once they have been going on the potty for a while, my daughter went through a period where she would pee her pants to get a new outfit.
this had to be stopped so had to "discipline" her when ever she did it.
but that was when she had been going regularly for several months not starting off.
rewards work well to, make potty time treat time or special reading and singing time.
they love it.
2007-03-14 19:10:20 · answer #10 · answered by Blessed Rain 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋