My 19-year-old son will hardly speak to me.?

Question

What should I do? I am 90% sure that he feels safe, loved, etc. Why won't he talk?

Answer 1

He is 19 he doesn't feel the need to speak to you. It comes with the age.

Answer 2

My son is the same way. He doesn't talk much. I hug him and give him a kiss goodnight every night, & sometimes that's the extent of our conversation on any given day! Besides, "what's for dinner," I mean. I know he feels safe & loved, too. Some guys that age just don't talk much, I'm convinced.

I'm comforted by the fact that sometimes he comes & gives me a spontaneous hug, too, and he still goes to movies with me. He probably won't be living at home much longer, and I'll miss him a lot when he flies the nest, even if he doesn't talk much.

Answer 3

Let him be a 19 year old pain in the as* for a little bit!
Once they get older the more you bug him the more he'll push you away and maybe start to hate you.
Just let him know you're there for him and don't call him for a week or so, give him some space.
Unless he lives with you...? In which case he's probably a spoiled brat. Get him out of the house so he can brood over real problems like making the rent.

Answer 4

In order to find out what is going on with him, you do need to talk to him. He may have an issue that he probably is afraid to talk about. He can also be depressed about something. Have you notice any other behavior problems that he has?

It could be just nothing wrong with him and he just doesn't want to talk to anyone at the moment. But, if you notice that this is an ongoing thing, then something must be wrong. Just hope he is not on any type of drug.

If he doesn't talk, then you talk to him and ask him how he is doing? How was work or school? Just give him a hug, he probably could use it!!

Answer 5

I was exactly this way when I was 19. It was because I want to learn to be independent from my parents. All you do is to give him some space and after 21, he will talk to you again. I am sure he loves you too and care about you. I am sure he is a good son.

Answer 6

This age is a very distinctive time that young boys are changing to young men. You know he feels safe and loved and all other good things he should be feeling. I noticed this is sort of normal at this age with a lot of young men. Do not be upset or discouraged, he is normal. lol ! this is also the age that young men really begin to think about the opposite sex and could be he is thinking them normal thoughts. Have to remember this, all young men this age, start out growing the need for Mom and Dad's constant attention and they do eventually want to have their own thoughts, start running their own life. Sounds like he is a very normal young man that is going up very nicely. Be proud, he could be screaming and demanding.

Answer 7

At 19 kids seem to think they carry the world on their shoulders. He probably has many issues that perhaps dont involve you that he needs to deal with and wants his own space. Maybe have a look at the other 10% you are not sure of, maybe there is something there. Good Luck

Answer 8

Well we teens fell like we need to be alone and once we hit a certain age we feel we must be independent. And some teens just dont like being around others and just want to be alone. I doubt its anything against you. Hes 19 he feels like he needs to take care of things by himself so tat means no running to mom or dad for help. Try talking to him or plan a family outing so you can get some quality time with him. The worst thing you can do is push him into talking to you. Dont force it or it will just get worse. Hope that helps :-D

Answer 9

Chances are good he's scared of something. I went through the exact same thing with my father when I was 17, and to be honest, neither of us remember what we started fighting about. We didn't speak for over 2 years, and now we're great. Try writing him a letter and tell him how it makes you feel when he ignores you, and just let him know you'll always be there. It will mean a lot.

Answer 10

At 19, kids (Especially boys) are moving on to the next phase of life in which they distance themselves from their parents and attempt a shot at the real world. Don't be discouraged--he'll come around once he has established himself as an adult or once he has realized that he can maintain a life of his own while also maintaining a relationship with you.