I want To Cheat Back?

Question

She cheated twice on me 20 years ago . Fist was for 18 months. Second was only twice becouse she got pregnant with his child . She just confessed and ask my forgiveness and i did. The problem she open the door to something i thought about but I would not break my marrige commitment. But why not now I can say well it just HAPPENED . Or you would not understand how lonley i was. I;m sure we can think up a million reasons. Maybe it will make me feel better and i can confess to her when i'm 70. HELP

Answer 1

do not cheat on her back but you are sort of living in the past.. didn't you say you forgave her... anyway if you want to get revenge on her theres something called divorce which for you I reccomend

Answer 2

Man, if you're thinking thoughts like this, you might wanna rethink how this relationship is actually going. If you can actually see yourself cheating on her, maybe your love isn't as strong as you thought it was. Other than that, it may just be plain old resentment and jealousy, but you need to understand that this was 20 YEARS ago, and people change a lot in FIVE years, let alone TWENTY. Focus on who she is now, and think about whether you could or couldn't live with your doing this. Aren't you a better person than a cheater? Aren't you higher than that? Think about it. You CAN beat this my friend, and my advice is to DEFINITELY not cheat back. It's the past, and she probably regrets it every day. Instead, take a closer look at this current relationship, and talk to her about it, or someone else to see if you can figure out what's going on and what you're thinking. Good luck, mate.

Answer 3

No, don't cheat back. That will just make you look as bad as she already does. If she confessed and you forgave her twenty years ago, why would you want to do something like that now. The past is the past and I think you should try moving on. If, however, you are having marital problems maybe it's time you two went to counseling together. Maybe that could help.

I'm sorry she cheated on you, but don't stoop down to her level. Try a different route like counseling I'm sure that would help.

Answer 4

Firstly, you must realize that she broke her commitment... not you. You really need time away from this woman so you can evaluate what your next step would be. Do you really want to spend the rest of your life with someone who could cheat on you, conceive with another man, and keep it a secret all this time?
Cheating won't solve anything. You'll have your revenge, but the damage will still be there. Do yourself a favor before you go dragging random women into bed. That might just make the situation worse.
I wish you luck. Remember you deserve better... especially from your wife.

Answer 5

Gary,
Why do you want to feel guilty for the next 20 years?
You know that what she did was wrong so why do you want to do something that you think is wrong as well?
If all that you want is sex just tell your wife that you are going to get some, just to get even but all it will do is make you both upset.
You need to really foregive her and both of you move on. Planning ways to get even or hurt each other isn't helping the situation.
On a cynical level, you have the moral high ground so why give it up. Better is if you can share the ground together and move on.

Answer 6

Hey you should just forget it because it happened so long ago!

If you were happy until the cheating story teller then you should tell her that although you gorgive her it is still bothering you and might need some time to really re-think things.

The worse thing that can happen is her getting upset but remember that she brought this to herself by cheating!!!

Take some time and hang out with your friends, go to nude bars and drink some beer, have a good time, maybe even take a vacation in a place considered a fun, party, wild place and don't tell her what you did once you are back! If you do have a sexual encounter just don't tell her and have fun!! If she tells you that, that's not fair just tell her that, what she did was not fair and now you need a vacation to really know what you want to do..................forgiving is not forgeting and the trust you had for her needs to be fixed, and you need some time alone to think about it and since you always had the dream to go to that place it is nothing but fair to go by yourself since you did not had the choice to pick the guy she was with and were not told she had this feelings, or what ever she felt for him, to you!!

If you decide to occupy your time to think and relax good for you..............you really love her!!

If you decide to have fun and party and have sex with someone else..................you might still have feelings for her but wanted revenge.

Or

You want to find out if by forgiving her and keeping the relationship you are doing a good thing or a bad thing!!

Good luck and just remember what ever you do where ever you go, make it your business and don't tell her!!! Make her feel what you felt when she told you her cheating story without having to tell her.............that will always make her think about how you may have felt when she told you what happened!!

If she cheats after your vacation or while on vacation and she tells you...................leave her!!!!!

Answer 7

She just put you on the slippery side of the slope. I'm taking a wild guess but I think she's trying to tell you something else , it's not the first time a girl tells you something in 69 different ways before she comes clean.
For all the girls reading this, your not all like that, just some of you.
I would get a divorce, then go do someone else, it will help your self esteem much more that way.
Ask HER what would you do if I cheated on you, you might be surprised.

Answer 8

Don't. Its just plain stupid. You want to have some one else? Get a divorce, you have every reason too. The idea that because your spouse cheated gives you some right do the same is pure idiocy. Say you punched me in the face, would it be all right with you if I kicked you in the nuts? Or should I be a man, take the punch and walk away (probably laughing about how you hit like a girl). Get a divorce, then bang whoever you want.

Answer 9

i think u should be the good guy type and not cheat on her back because if u do...she will never forgive. So what if she cheated on you before, it was a while ago, and if ur so mad at her then just tell her how u feel, or if u dont want to do that then just break up with her. I still think u should just talk to her about it instead of us...dont be wrong like her...i know u still love her, of course, she's ur wife!!!!

Answer 10

What!? That is no way to live... Get outta there! It may happen again, and doing it back won't make you happy. Find a nice girl with morals, that, will make you feel better. I know marriage is a life long commitment, and I would never want mine to fail. Anything could happen and I would try fix it... anything. Anything except cheating. That is one thing that would make me end it the instant I was aware of it. My bf cheated on me after 2 years, I stayed with him, didn't completely trust him anymore (that causes problems), 4 years later I ended up doing it back. It didn't make me feel better, I regret it! That's not who I am, but I now have to live with the fact that I did it. I am no longer with him and have found someone who would rather die than cheat on me. That makes me feel better.

Answer 11

Trust me, you don't want to go there. You need to know that you have more integrity than that. It's completely understandable that you want to, but it won't help the situation at all. Then she could go out to have revenge sex, and the cycle would begin all over again.

She confessed because she obviously felt guilty. Besides, she kind of owes you, doesn't she? If you cheat, then she doesn't owe you a thing.

Give yourself some time to absorb what happened. If you need time away from her, go to a motel, but don't cheat. You'll feel terrible regardless of her indiscretions. Decide if you want to salvage your marriage, and if you don't, then move on with a clear conscience.

Good luck.