My mom wants to adopt my baby cousin???

Question

I do not agree with my mom adopting my cousin. My aunt is a big loser who can't take care of her children so my cousin is temporarily living with my mom. My mom wants to adopt him because she wants him to stay with the family but she is so mean to him. He has problems b/c of the life he's been forced to lead so far and he is troublesome but she treats him like crap. He is not treated the same as my sisters who still live a t home. My mom screams at him and he is really trying. I don't know what I can do??? I want to call the social worker and remain ananymous. Is this wrong and can I do this?? Please help???

He's 3 by the way:)

I am not a spoiled brat or a child I am 22 years old and do not live at home. My stepfather will never accept him b/c my cousin is half black...don't ask he's a jerk...I want my cousin to have the best life possible.

Answer 1

Honey, I feel for you and the position you are in. You do need to do the right thing. Have you ever talked to your mom about how she treats this young boy? What kind of Mom was she to you? Why do you think she is treating your cousin so badly? This little guy has had a tough enough life. I do think you need to intervene. I do hope something good will come of it. Bless you for your bravery. I am proud of you! You just came forth with more information. Your step father may be coming down on your mom which is why she is being so hard on the boy. She wants to do the right thing but steppy is an A_ _. You do need to act upon this. I would hate to think this little guy's life is at risk. Again, good luck!

Answer 2

Normally, my first reaction is to talk to your mom, but I would imagine you have already done so. If not, please start there.

You may be able to call a social worker and report a concern. It is not wrong to protect a child, ever! Most schools have social workers that handle cases like this, if he is in school you may want to call and talk to the social worker there. He/she can help you and also talk to your cousin about it and may decide that he is in need of some counselling or mentoring or other help. If there is not a social worker, the school nurse is the next place to go. Both are trained to handle cases like these.

If there is not someone at his school who can help or if the people there are not helpful, my suggestion would be to call the child protection agency in your area/state/etc. In Illinois, it is called the Department of Child and Family Services (DCFS), but it may be different wherever you live. Calls to DCFS are always annonymous to the parent so that the parent cannot retaliate against the caller. I am not sure, but I would think that most of the similar agencies also ensure anonymity. Calling would mean that someone would investigate the arrangement and decide what should be done. This would also be a factor in any adoption case that gets filed.

Please do not get discouraged if you hit obstacles along the way. You are doing the right thing in wanting to protect your cousin. This must be very hard for you, and I wish you the best.

Answer 3

Sounds like your mom really doesn't have the patience or time to deal with him any better than your aunt did. I'm sure she has his best interest at heart, but that doesn't mean it's a good idea. But before you call a social worker, can you think of any other relatives that could take care of him? It would be sad for him to be taken out of the family completely, but if he's in danger at your house, it may be the only way. Good luck, hun, hope it all works out.

Answer 4

Yelling isn't a reason to call a social worker/CPS.If the child has food in the cabinets, clothing in his closet 6 or more items, a bed on the floor even if it's a mattress, no bruises, no broken bones, no sexual harm being done, they aren't going to take that case. talk to your mom, confront her when she yells at him, ask her why. Tell her she is being unfair. If that doesn't get through to her, maybe a social worker would be a good call.

Answer 5

i think of 18 is only too youthful to undertake. And to be blunt, $1600 a month isn't actual an extremely extreme earnings-- inspite of the indisputable fact that it ought to search so which you will infants who're used to the wages they could make at a summer activity, and have on no account had to stay independently... no longer precisely a extreme suggestion that she's waiting to be certain. She could conflict to make ends meet on that pay point if she had a baby. there is not any genuine way she ought to locate the money for the adoption costs, and whether she ought to, it strikes me as a splash unfair to hold a baby right into a undertaking of poverty, or no longer less than perpetual money issues, by way of adoption. i do no longer think of any expectant mom in her suitable techniques could choose your cousin for an adoptive be certain, according to her age and financial status, and the fact the toddler could ought to pass into daycare for the reason that she's a single be certain. What precisely does your cousin think of she will supply that the toddler's organic and organic mom can not? This strikes me as only shifting the baby from one mom in disaster to a distinctive teenager who would be positioned right into a disaster by employing having a baby placed along with her. Your cousin can actual evaluate adoption back in some years whilst she's extra financially stable, yet for now bringing a baby into this could turn it right into a disaster undertaking. that may no longer honest or variety to the baby. In adoption, the baby's desires ought to be the undertaking. it is approximately your cousin's needs. She shouldn't undertake till she's arranged to fulfill her baby's desires-- which she at present isn't. ETA: Your edits to objective to justify this are only making it worse, so I recommend you supply up once you're forward. heavily. She purely works section time using fact she's residing off relatives money? She ought to assist herself yet would not worry using fact mommy and daddy (or grandma and grandpa or whoever else) seems after it for her? How is THAT indicating a accountable be certain? She would not even stay independently. How is she meant to be seen accountable sufficient to have a baby, whilst she shall we human beings help her? additionally... she already cares for better than one baby below the age of twelve? and she or he's purely 18 herself? She would not choose a baby. She ought to shield the infants she's already liable for, no longer carry extra into this occasion. This only seems worse and worse. Your cousin is somewhat no longer waiting to undertake.

Answer 6

Yes sweetie if you feel that he is being treated wrong than by all means call and report it.Don't let that poor child suffer any more than he already has and is, reach out and help him, and if you know that she could treat him better and is not and will not than no it's not wrong it's the right thing o do for him good luck

Answer 7

That is not good. He already has enough issues, from his own family, losing his family, and now trying to work in another home.
She needs to understand his behavior and work with him on changing it. If she doesn't do that, he would be better off elsewhere.
Talk to your mom and see what you can do. If that don't work then I would recommend calling dss, but not sure what good it would do.
If adoption becomes an answer outside the family, We would be interest. e-mail active.

Answer 8

If your mom is truely treating this child the way you say she is, then call the social worker and report everything that you know.

Answer 9

u r doing a great thing for caring so much. can u talk to a social worker not acutally involved in the case to get better guidance?
a 3 year old needs lots of unconditional love, if u can preovide that, it will help w/ his behavior.

Answer 10

if u care for you baby cousin and u dount want him to be treated so bad by your mom, u might as well talk to ur mom and ask her the real reason why she wants to adopt him and juz treat him like a crap? this aint make sense i think there's a reason behind it........