How can I get treated with respect in a relationship. My ex when we were together always, yelled at me, hung up on me. And did what ever he wanted, whenever. Yes, he is my ex and I shouldn't care but I do. He went back to the mother of his child? I asked him to do me one favor and babysit. I have no one else to ask so I can work on the weekends. He said no because it's unfair to her and she would not feel comfortable with it. This hurt me because when we were together. He never treated me with this that type of respect he did whatever he wanted. Didn't care what I thought he spent a night over her house while we were engaged. And told me she asked him to fix a tv in her bedroom. Then she told him she had an itch that needed to be scratched!...He said I had no right to get upset because she is the mother of his child...That really hurt me. The father of my child did the same thing he has not seen our daughter in 5 years. Because his wife thinks we still have feeling for each other.
2007-03-14 09:52:43 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
This makes her uncomfortable. She threatened to leave him if he come around us. So he made his choice. He also did whatever he wanted when we where together with no regards to my feelings also. Even though he knew it upset me. I met someone I liked we were suppose to get together. He kept saying he couldn't because he was being faithful and didn't want to hurt his girlfriend. I later found out that was a lie. A source told me he was going on about how fine this girl was of another race. He tried to talk to her. She cursed him out. So he really wasn't all that into his girlfriend he just didn't like me. Every person I ever dated always respects there other mates but treats me poorly.....why?
Sorry its long, but I wanted to include all details.
Please answer with out being disrespectful,
Thanks!
2007-03-14 10:05:51 · update #1
This makes her uncomfortable. She threatened to leave him if he come around us. So he made his choice. He also did whatever he wanted when we where together with no regards to my feelings also. Even though he knew it upset me. I met someone I liked we were suppose to get together. He kept saying he couldn't because he was being faithful and didn't want to hurt his girlfriend. I later found out that was a lie. A source told me he was going on about how fine this girl was of another race. He tried to talk to her. She cursed him out. So he really wasn't all that into his girlfriend he just didn't like me. Every person I ever dated always respects there other mates but treats me poorly.....why?
Sorry its long, but I wanted to include all details.
Please answer with out being disrespectful,
Thanks!
2007-03-14 10:06:10 · update #2
Please understand, people will only do to you what you allow them to do. Evidently you have not set healthy boundaries in the past when it came to your relationships. For whatever reason, you have felt that did not deserve better.
You need to get some good relationship counseling (alone) and figure out why you are continually attracted to men who dis-respect you and yet, you accept it. Listen, if not for you, do it for your child. If not, they too will grow up with little self-worth and end up in the same types of relationships because they are just extensions of the home life they were used to.
Read some good books "Codependent no more", "Love is a choice", etc. for a start. Those will help you build your worth. Another excellent one is by Dr. Barbra De Angelis called, "Are you the one for me".
Please believe in yourself. Say some positive affirmations repeatedly till you actually believe them. Set healthy boundaries and be prepared to walk if they don't happen. You deserve the best in life and your children do too.
Good luck!
2007-03-14 10:00:16 · answer #1 · answered by Singthing 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
People will treat you the way you allow them to. You actually teach them ,by your actions, just what they can or cannot do. Every time you let this guy treat you wrong is telling him that it is okay with you. It may hurt , but stand up for yourself. Tell the sob that his actions are not acceptable and will not be tolerated. In the long run, you will be doing yourself a big favor by ridding your life of this type of low life. Don't settle for 2nd best..you deserve better. And you know it! It may not be easy, but it will be worth it.
2007-03-14 10:05:12 · answer #2 · answered by territizzyb 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
People treat you the way you let them. Respect yourself and don't let people disrespect you. It might be hard, but kick these toxic people out of your life if necessary. You need to be surrounded by positive feelings, then you will be positive yourself.
2007-03-14 10:30:09 · answer #3 · answered by graybear 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When you allow people to do things like that to you you aren't requiring them to respect you so they don't. You taught him that so be aware in future relationships to not allow others to treat you badly. You have to be willing to kick someone to the curb when they don't treat you with respect because YOU respect yourself and you deserve better!
2007-03-14 10:03:06 · answer #4 · answered by MissWong 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You teach people how to treat you! You FIRST have to respect YOURSELF enough to not put up with behavior like that. When someone is rude to you, stop RIGHT then and tell them that it is not acceptable for you to be treated that way. If they don't like that you stood up for yourself, tell them not to let the door hit them in the rear!
2007-03-14 09:57:40 · answer #5 · answered by happylittlemom 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
In my opinion
In any relationship whether it be Friends , lovers , parents and children, or any other relationship there has GOT to be TRUST and RESPECT, without these two things I personally can't see any relationship working.
In your case I think you are better off without him as he obviously does not want to be with you.
2007-03-14 10:02:31 · answer #6 · answered by tellme 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋