This is really just a question to see if there are any other women out there who would feel the same as I do. I've been dating this guy seriously for just over 2 years now. We've talked about marriage, family, etc. I'm not materialistic by any means, but when it comes to giving meaningful gifts, he just doesn't put any thought into it. The first Christmas we were together, he gave me a set of lamp bases for my living room, without the shades ... for Valentines day, he gave me a framed 4x6 picture of us ... for my birthday, he gave me a plastic collage frame ... this past Christmas he gave me nothing. In the past 2 yrs, he has given me nothing of substance ... no bracelet, earrings, necklace ... anything of meaning. Hell, anything more personal than household or decorative items would be great. Should I say something to him? How? It makes me feel like I'm just a stepping stone in his life instead of someone he loves. Are there any other women out there who would feel this way?
2007-03-14 08:58:50 · 9 answers · asked by anon2009 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
My husband gave me a pen as the birthday gift when we just knew each other. I told him I did not like it directly. Then I got another gift, but he would not buy me anything forwardly since then. I think the better way for you is to find a chance to discuss the gift's topic with him. Open a jewelry online store, pretending you want to give a bracelet to your best friend as a birthday gift, and want to see his opinion. You can tell him which one you like most, and which one fit your dress... and see what's his reaction.
2007-03-15 19:03:10 · answer #1 · answered by hellenwashington 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you need to talk to him, 2 years is long enough to feel like you can discuss issues.
Myself.. I didnt get a christmas gift or birthday gift this year from my boyfriend at the time. But the time we spent together was way more better than any material thing. And we knew it. We didnt exchange gifts because we decided just being together and doing something fun or together was worth more.
You need to talk to him because he might be a guy that has no idea how to shop or he might be broke.
2007-03-14 16:05:12 · answer #2 · answered by Navulam 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, it sounds like he does a lot of shopping at Ross. But aside from that, it kind of depends on his income. Maybe he doesn't really have the kind of resources (i.e. income) that would allow him to provide you with the types of gifts that you would like. I would suggest you do more window shopping with him to hint at preferred gift items. I would feel the same way, the gifts he is giving you are really juvenile, and if he doesn't have the income then that's one thing, but if he DOES have the means to get you nicer gifts and is not, then I would assume that he's not taking you too seriously. Another possibility is maybe he's reciprocating the type of gift giving that you are doing? Do you give expensive gifts? Because if not, I would suggest that you start to see if he will step it up in the gift department. If not, maybe he's a tight bastard and you would not want to spend the rest of your life with a tight bastard, especially if your nature is generous.
2007-03-14 16:21:16 · answer #3 · answered by Andrea M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, you should expect more. I was like you until an x boyfriend opened my eyes. He was dating me and someone else same time. He bought us both the same gifts for holidays and stuff. Example for valentines day we both got watches however hers was a Mavado mine was a Bulova (the cheaper one) I asked him why would he buy her the more expensive and get me the cheaper one his answer was I knew you (ME) would appreciate the gift and the thought but she (the one he cheated on me with) would not accept anything less. Therefore set your standards higher and tell him to stop being either cheap or lazy.
2007-03-14 16:19:57 · answer #4 · answered by Kat G 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well it's not like he's not trying. Say next time you're in a store together "something like this would be nice for my birthday/Christmas". Some guys need to be steered in the right direction.
2007-03-14 16:08:44 · answer #5 · answered by m k 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i really don't think men get it, it's like being romantic, unless they are taught or seen it in there family,when my son got engaged i wrote him many letters on how to keep her happy, and about how women are with there monthly problem,about how they need to hear
'i love you
", a lot,you need to spend time with her and do things together,even if it's just cuddling up and watching TV.anyways he's learned a lot from his old mom,and i think he's watched a lot of chick flicks, cause he is awesome with his new wife and she thanks me every time she gets the chance,you may wan ta watch some chick flicks, or kinda tell him that when he buys gifts,buy them from the heart.and tell him never buy appliances for birthdays or Christmas.good luck Hun, they are hard to train
2007-03-14 16:13:50 · answer #6 · answered by debbie d 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you need to tell him. Otherwise he's probably figuring you're fine with everything he's given you so far, since you haven't said anything.
2007-03-14 16:05:29 · answer #7 · answered by Valerie S 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you need to tell him get it or hit it (hit the road) he isnt worth your time and you want to move on.with a guy with subtimental features .
2007-03-14 16:03:33 · answer #8 · answered by mrs jamel 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes, my boyfriend just gives me gag gifts
2007-03-14 16:03:33 · answer #9 · answered by kaysettle18 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋