Can you speak Canadian?

Question

can you translate this:

"They'd cut off my E.I. and the pogey was still a week away, so I rounded up all the twoonies and loonies I could find in the chesterfield, and hiked a coupla clicks to the LC to pick up a half sack and a mickey, but settled on a flat and a twenty-sixer and a plan to get right p¡ssed.

It was a skookum plan, but I shoulda paid the hydro, cuz they cut me off and now my two-four froze along with the taps and I'm huddled in my tuque, johnnies and mack - without enough left for a hot double double and a jambuster. I'm set for butts though and I've got a whack of KD (but nowheres to cook it).

I'm also late for rent on my bachelor, so I'm dekeing my Jean-gee Pepsi landlord as I promised I'd sign over my GST rebate when I got it from revcan. He's somewhat of a goof but I don't want a kerfuffle cuz HNIC and Coaches Corner is tonight and I want to see the Habs knock out the Leafs (like a good 'pegger I'm rootin for anyone but Hogtown)."

eh?

Answer 1

Yeah although you have mixed several regional dialects... Personally I think Northern Ontario has the better slang..lol

can you translate this??

Hey man! Party at the camp tonite.. bring the range were goin risk roadin too... dont forget to pick up a twixer of wisers and a mickey o worm juice on the way outta Suds. Pick up some bago butts on the way too, and dont forget the papes were gonna need lots cause we cleaned out the spot last week.. Pick up the boys from the rez on the way too man buddy owes me some green. Were gonna have a jam sesh too itll be kick ayas... we already got some timmy hos, so dont worry bout that. Oh ya, we need some mix too and pick up some OJ for the shrooms gets a better buzz goin. So hurry up biotch and dont be f*ckin the dog, or we'll start on the two four without ya.. we already busted out the BTs and did some two lites, party!! woo hoo.

Answer 2

They would cut off my employment insurance and the welfare was still a week away, so I rounded up all the $2 and $1 coins I could find in the couch, and...I don't know what "hiked a coupla clicks to the LC to pick up a half sack and a mickey, but settled on a flat and a twenty-sixer and a plan to get right pissed" means. Is the person going to some liquor store in Manitoba?

It was a good plan/the best plan, but I should've paid for the electricity, because they cut mee off and now my twenty-four pack of beer froze along with the taps (the drinking game I assume?) and I'm huddled in my winter hat?, johnnies? (don't know what that is) and mack (a raincoat/coat?) - without enough left for a hot double double (coffee) and a jelly-filled donut. I'm set for butts though (don't know what that means) and I've got a whack of Kraft Dinner (macaroni and cheese) but no where to cook it.

I'm also late for rent on my bachelor (not exactly sure what that means...apartment? room?), so I promised my landlord I would sign over my GST (goods and services tax) rebate when I got it from Canada Revenue Agency. He's somewhat of a goof but I don't want a kerfuffle (don't know what that means)...because Hockey Night In Canada and the intermission highlight (called Coach's corner) is tonight and I want to see the Montreal Canadiens win the Toronto Maple Leafs (like a good pegger? (what's pegger) I'm supporting anyone but Toronto.

eh?

Most of the idioms or "Canadian words", I don't know. I had to look it up. Most of the words, I've never heard of and I've been living in Canada for over 10 years. Thanks it was fun. Now I know more Canadian after looking some words up.

Answer 3

They had stopped my unemployment (EI = UI)payments and the welfare check was still a week away, so i gathered up all the spare change (loonie = 1$, two-nie = $2) I could find in the sofa and hiked a couple miles to the liquor store (LC = Liquor Commission) to get some weed and a half bottle of J.D, but had to settle for beer and a 26oz and a plan to get sh--faced.

It was a great plan, but I should have paid the electrical bill because they turned off the power and my beer froze along with the taps. I'm huddled in my hat, long johns, and ragged clothing without even any money for coffee and toast. I have enough cigarettes though, and got loads of Kraft Dinner (but no way of cooking it).

I'm also late on the lease for my small apartment, so I'm avoiding the french landlord (Jean-Guy is a common french name and Pepsi is a derogatory slang for frenchman in Manitoba and Quebec) because I promised I'd pay the rent using the money I got back from my government tax rebate check. He's a bit of an idiot, but I don't want to get into it with him because the hockey game is on tonight and I want to see Montreal eliminate Toronto from the playoffs. (Like a good Manitoban, I'm cheering for anyone but Toronto!)

Answer 4

they cut off my employment insurance and my social service check is still a week away, so I rounded up all the two dollar and one dollar coins I could find in the sofa and walked a couple kilometers to the liquor cooperation to pick up a 6 pack of beer and a flask, but settled on a 24 case of beer and a 26 oz bottle of liquor and plan to get drunk
it was a good plan but I should have paid the electric bill because they cut the power and now my beer and pipes have frozen and I'm hubbled in my knitted cap, long under ware and coat- without enough money for a coffee and donut. I've got enough cigarettes though and a lot of Kraft dinner.
I'm also late with the rent on my apartment, so I'm avoiding my landlord because I promised to give him money for my goods and service check rebate when I get it from revenue Canada. He's an idiot but I don't want a fight cause hockey is on tonight and I wanna see the Toronto Maple leaves play. I'm a good Winnipeg but I'm rooting for the Leaves.
What do you think?

Answer 5

Do you actually want me to write it all down? I could if you really wanted me too, it would just take some time.

Most of it's common sense. And very few people in Canada "actually" talk like that. Sure we have some funny expressions or words that you might not get, but think about it like reading Shakespeare. You just need to get the basic idea and the rest will come later on.

Besides what's wrong with being a proud canuck eh?

Answer 6

It was perfectly clear to me. And how are you watching the Habs, if the hydro is off and you can't cook the KD?

pegger - Winnipegger - inhabitant of Winipeg
kerfuffle - fight, argument
LC - Liquor Corporation
flat - 24 cans of beer
twenty-sixer - 26 oz. bottle of liquor, usually whiskey
taps etc. - the water pipes are frozen
tuque - knitted hat
johnnies - long johns - underwear - "Stanfields"
mack - mackintosh or mackinaw - coat
right pissed - drunk
bachelor - bachelor apartment- 2 or 3 room apartment

Answer 7

Love it!! I've sent this off to a few of my American Friends and they all had quiet a chuckle; as they remember the 1st year in school I spoke in a similar fashion. Good job.

Answer 8

Ah yes...I know this language well. Your talking Atlantic Canada talk me friend. Ya must be a Newf I figure. I could translate it for ya...but I'm in a rush to me next answer. I'm from Atlantic Canada myself. :-)

Answer 9

Yep, sounds like my best friend from Newfoundland speaking, and all the translations above a correct..

Answer 10

Too funny eh, hidin out on the land lord. You sound like a Newf (no offence)