I am now 30, and my great uncle has been an absolute blessing to me up until this point. He is getting older, however, and is lacking spirit. Unfortunately, I am living over 1,000 miles away and cannot be by his side to cheer him up. I just had a new son recently and family life is taking up a good deal of my time. I am planning on purchasing a plane ticket for him to come from PA to FL to visit for his Bday. What could I plan that would be very meaningful to him and perhaps re-ignite the fire inside of him that once burned so strongly. He always used to say "Ahh, it's a great life"...now what i usually hear after we discuss past events is "Them days are gone" or "Yea, those were the days" spoken in as if defeated especially when i speak of things we did together. Please help calm my restless spirit that is torn between being by his side to the end and raising my family here in FL. Thank you and God Bless!
2007-03-14 06:57:56 · 10 answers · asked by Bumbo 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Awesome! You're obviously a great guy. Be like a son to him. Sit with him and talk with him. Talk about everything you can think of. Ask him about his childhood. He will remember and share some of his best memories, things that he probably hasn't thought about, let alone talked about, in decades. It's not a bad thing to talk about death. Ask him if he's afraid to die. You might be surprised by his answer and blessed at the same time. It strange, in our society it used to be ok to talk about death and taboo to talk about sex. Now everything has flipped. Give him your time, he'll be thrilled to accept it, I'm sure.
Have a blessed day!
2007-03-14 07:28:20 · answer #1 · answered by JV 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Honestly, there really isn't anything that you can do while he is there, that's only like a one time drug high, good while you have it, but after it's over, back to the same state of mind. He needs friends or family to see on a daily basis, people to talk to, places to go. How fun is it to be doing all those things in life when you're alone? Your ucle is getting older, and we all know how much older people love talking about the past. The best thing I can suggest is to maybe find some way that he can move to FL in the same town as you. Not move IN with you, but to be closer, where he can come over for dinners, go to the zoo with you and your family, do things with other people. I think one of the biggest things for an older person is to see their families grow up, mature into adulthood, and if he doesn't have that in his life, he's probably feeling like his life is worthless. Of course, if your wife agrees, which if she's a good person and sympathetic to him, she should, then it won't be a problem to have him living a little closer. If she does agree, and you decide to talk to him about it, expect him to put up a fight, he isn't going to want to feel like a burden to anyone or feel like he's encrouching on anyone's space. Plus if he's lived where he is for a long time he's going to be resistant. But don't have regrets later in life if you did try this and he didn't go along with it, and he passes away. Kids have to grow up and move away, that's life. Just know that you did the best you could, and that there wasn't anything you could do different really. Just make sure you always let him know you care about him and love him. Good luck and the best of wishes. Sorry I couldn't have been more of a help. If you want to ask more about what I said, feel free to email me :-)
2007-03-14 14:12:59 · answer #2 · answered by t.larae 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You sound like a very kind and compassionate person, and Im sure your great uncle already appreciates you. Personally I would send him a card with your childs footprint in it, maybe with paint. Then I would write a message about how important his life has been and despite what he thinks, people are proud of him and what he has achieved so far in his life, and are counting on him to keep contributing. Tell him that he has inspired you and that he can still keep inspiring others, and most importantly, tell him that the little footprint is his great nephew - who wants to follow in his great uncles footsteps... :-)
2007-03-14 14:23:26 · answer #3 · answered by crashdog492 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Make up a photo of you and your son for him to bring back with him. Put together a photo album for him to look at when he gets home. Take lots of pictures while he is there to add to the album. An old friend of mine told me that just getting a phone call during the day would make him smile for a few more. Keep sending photos for him to add to the album, even just everyday ones.. so he feels he is part of it and not forgotten. Keep him informed of everything you, even if it's no big deal, just so he feels part of it.
2007-03-14 14:17:54 · answer #4 · answered by mayihelpyou 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get your butt down there, pack him up, and move him close to you. And why wait for his birthday? Get him a plane ticket now...especially to see your new son! That might be the best thing to get some spirit into him! He probaby feels left out, useless, and neglected. Show him he's not....while you still have the chance.
2007-03-14 23:25:16 · answer #5 · answered by Mama_Kat 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Probably the greatest thing that you could do for him would be to LISTEN to him and to let him see that you follow his advice. Let him tell you his stories so that he can relive them with you. Give him as much time and attention as you can without making him feel like an invalid. Ask him questions and avail yourself of his knowledge. I'm 41 now and I wish that I had an older relative around to guide me. They have so much experience and so much to teach - if only we would listen.
2007-03-14 14:03:36 · answer #6 · answered by Dovie 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
i was going to tell you to spend time with him...................and you are! i bet that you don't need to do anything. just being near him is all he needs. it's hard to be that age and alone.
god bless you for being so compassionate and loving towards your uncle!!!!
2007-03-15 22:03:57 · answer #7 · answered by that girl! 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Some ideas from my side :
Nice welcome on arrival -decorate your house.
Put old pictures of him when he was young and with you.
Make the food of his choice.
Spend maximum time with him
Live each moment when he is with you.
2007-03-14 14:07:19 · answer #8 · answered by pizza 1 · 3⤊ 0⤋
is he in a nursing home? that could definitely be what is giving him that kind of attitude.
best present...move him out there with you permanently
be cool...
2007-03-14 14:02:28 · answer #9 · answered by CC Babydoll 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
bring over a couple of hotties and have a wild orgy together, he'll love it.
2007-03-14 14:01:53 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 4⤋